Oh the Family Drama begins!

Ok here's the background...
This year was my Dad's parents' 60th wedding anniversary. In January my extended family began planning a big shin-dig for them (secret) and after much "oh we're busy then and then and then", and "we should have it here or here", and "lets cater/lets not/lets cater" things have started to finally come together and get finalized. But my sister brought up a new "issue" and oh boy has the drama begun!

She and I are the "photographers" in the family and with her being there to visit and having a 18 month old, she does not want the "responsibility" to get photos. So she posed to the email group that we hire a "professional" to take the photos.

Well my cousin's wife brought forward two ladies. One is a "retired professional photographer" and the other is an actively working professional. They both go to my cousin's church. My cousin's wife sent us a link to her Facebook album with photos the first took. Um....they were not great. They were OK, but frankly they look like something I could take. They lighting was off on them (she had sun spots showing) and they looked like almost no processing was done on them. She only charged $50 and gave them the CD. The other has a full up website and her stuff is gorgeous and does wedding photography, etc. She has a sitting fee of $200 for large party events and then you get the proof book and buy all the other photos individually. So obviously more money.

And here's the other wrinkle...my Aunt emailed how she is friends with #1 photographer's parents and that she could really use the money and that paying $50 for a shoot like this is too little so we should pay her more. So my sister and I both emailed saying with it being such a unique event (all children, grandchildren, great grand children) being there at once, we would be willing to pay more money to get the second one since she will have all the proper equipment etc. I couldn't say that my cousin's photos looked bad because then that would bring in bad feelings that way I'm sure!

So my Aunt responded this way, "I have been following all of these strings and am going to try to stay quiet on the subject. (Since I have already indicated my personal bias towards Jessie based solely on my friendship with her husband’s parents.) But at least met me say this much: I have also seen Jessie’s work when she photographs families for Christmas cards – Does a nice job with large (8-15 person) families and I have heard that she has “morphed” faces from various selections to make an impossible group all appear to be smiling at the same time. Jessie also used to be a model before she met Pete, if that means anything. Vanessa’s example does not show all that Jessie has done.

One other comment: What level of excellence would we (and Grandma & Grandpa) be pleased with? Fully credentialed photographers can become very expensive; is everyone willing to contribute towards the cost of a professional photographer?

What would Grandma and Grandpa enjoy most? I am not lobbying, I am pondering this point. What do others think? "



So now I'm wondering...what would you all do? Would you fight it and get the photographer that you know will do a great job or would you risk it with the other one just to keep the family peace?!! I mean I guess my sister and I are photography snobs or something!

Bring forth the issues of quality between the two photographers.

Is there a chance you could do the post processing on the photos to make the family happy?

And then let there be family peace. I know a few can bully everyone, and there's some personal bias. But is it worth a war over a photographer who is going to get the shots even if they aren't perfect?

I'd stick to your guns, Kim. Your grandparents will enjoy the photos I'm sure, one way or the other...but aside from making them happy, you're preserving the memories for many generations. I wouldn't be aggressive about it or anything, but they should respect the opinion of the resident expert here...and that is you. Photos should never be skimped on. I paid for my wedding and we managed to pull it off REALLY cheap...like $2,000...and over 1/3 of that was on the photographer. While that marriage didn't last, the photos are still meaningful. I'm glad we didn't skimp.

I paid over $1200 for my wedding photos, taken by a professional. It is one expense I haven't regretted for 1 second. I would definitely pay for the professional, I wouldn't think twice about it, and I would fight until I won the battle. You don't want crappy photos!

I will always side with a more professional photographer, and I personally think that your aunt shouldn't have brought up the personal side of things (she could use the money, she used to be a model, etc). It should be based on quality alone.

Kim we went through something similar with my family for family photos this past Dec. We hired a professional studio, then my Grandma canceled it and found a lady that was cheaper. The "cheaper" lady wanted to shoot our photos inside a church without supplemental lighting and no solid background, etc. I was appalled as I knew that this photos were once in a lifetime since getting us all together is a rare event (esp since we are moving to Japan in a few months). So I did some research and contacted the first photographer we had booked and found out that they didn't even have a studio big enough for us. So I then found a studio that could accommodate us and we only paid $250 TOTAL and got the cd for the photos. I did the processing myself so all the photographer charged us for was the sitting fee. We got AMAZING photos and it was so worth it. We all chipped in and paid maybe $25-$30 each, so when you look at it like that it's not that much money considering the memories we captured!

My Grandma was pissy about the photog changes and she was pissy about the color scheme for the photos (girls wore black, men wore white and we all wore jeans). But after it was all said and done everyone loved the photos. So you may get some pissy family members but when it's all said and done everyone will love the photos so you totally need to get a professional, if you don't you'll just regret it I think!

So I guess I am a photography snob too!

It sounds like sooooooo much planning has gone into a very special event. I would have the professional photographer there...even if it meant out of my own pocket. If your Aunt is really concerned, she could just hire the "friend" to take candid shots throughout the event since your main photographer can't be watching everyone all the time. She may capture a unique and special moment that might have othewise been missed.

After hiring friend "photographers" for my wedding and now not having a SINGLE good wedding picture from the two of them combined, I will vote for the pro every time.

Traci Reed said:

After hiring friend "photographers" for my wedding and now not having a SINGLE good wedding picture from the two of them combined, I will vote for the pro every time.

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Oh that is so sad Traci
At least you got those HAWT trash the dress pics

haha we did those because we had no wedding pics

I wouldn't waver. While you obviously will not sway your aunt's opinion and trying to sway others' opinions will be seen as 'going behind her back,' I think you could play the photography experience card so long as you did so in an email to the whole group.

Maybe emphasize the difference of snapshots vs. event photos? A 'regular' person might not see the difference right away, but perhaps pointing out that you are trying to capture the whole experience of the party vs. a handful of group shots of everyone looking at the camera will help. 'Regular' people don't think abt/don't realize how photography can capture the interaction between people, almost like a video camera, but perhaps pointing this out, with some examples from either your own photos or from the pro photog's work, will help them see the light.

Perhaps you could mollify your aunt by promising to hire non-pro photog for some other not really that important family event later this summer? If she is just wanting to give her a hand, surely someone can hire her for a family weekend at the lake, a birthday party, a Fourth of July BBQ, etc.

Good luck. I hate family drama, but I think if it came down to photos at a 60th anniv party, I'd stick with my guns and let the drama ensue.

OK I voted professional but if I went with the family friend I would bring my own camera and try to get some pictures myself and maybe have your sister bring hers too? That way you are almost guaranteed to have some good pictures. In events like this I think its not just the posed shots which are important it is the candid shots as well.

I would say do what you feel comfortable with, this will only happen once, so it might be more expensive, but in the long run I would think it would be worth it.

Having gone with 'friend of a friend/relative who needs helping out' on more than one occasion, for a variety of things as well as photography - I loudly vote for a professional. I'd be sorry so & so could use the money or the reference or whatever, but this is a once in a lifetime thing. It needs to be done by someone with a solid, proven track record of getting the job done excellently. Not just a good job. An excellent job. This is not the annual family picinic, this is a major event & need to be done the best it can be. And that means paying for it, but it is so worth it. Serve cheaper drinks if you have to. No one will remember the drinks. They will remember the photos.

I feel strongly about this, can your tell.

As a former pro myself, I'd go with the actively working pro-- especially if she does a lot of weddings because your event is going to be a similar environment to a wedding. There is definitely an art to wedding & event photography that takes experience to develop (and which you can become rusty at if you aren't doing it regularly!).

My only recommendation would be to look closely at the print prices. I know a lot of pros are lowering their initial sitting fees to attract clients in this tough economy, and then people have a really hard time when they sit down to order the beautiful photos and can't afford much because of the high print prices. I'm not knocking the photographers at all, just talking realistically about how it works. So, try to think about how many photos you will want from this event and how much it's gonna end up costing. If there's a lot of photojournalistic stuff, you may end up wanting a lot of photos to really capture the flavor of the day. Many photographers have their print prices starting at $30 or more, so it can add up quick. You might also see if she does slideshows and or albums of the photos to purchase.