Making kids talk on the phone-opinions?

rach3975

rach3975

New member
If out of town relatives call and your kids don't want to talk, do you make them? I think some of our relatives think it's rude when we don't make our boys (ages 3 and 6) get on the phone if they don't want to. I certainly don't want to encourage bad manners, but I feel like forcing them to talk will make their relationship with their grandparents feel like a chore. This way they don't talk as often, but when they do it's because they have things they're excited about sharing with the relatives. There are times when talking on the phone is non-negotiable, like birthday calls or when someone calls specifically to tell them something.

So what do you think? Is it bad manners or an acceptable choice for us to let our kids say no sometimes?
 
how do you make someone talk anyway ^_^ ...

no. I don't force him to talk to anyone, hug anyone, or anythign anyone if he doesn't want to. As long as he's respectful and not being snotty.. then it's his choice.
 
Nope, I give him the phone and sometimes he says, he doesn't want to. No big deal, he's 3, I can't make him hold the phone and talk and who cares. Sometimes he will ask to call someone and then not talk. Sometimes, I will just stand next to him and ask him myself things and then he will say them so they can hear him say something new he's learned.
 
We are currently out of country so I know how this goes all too often. We don't make the kids talk. Well cause they won't. If they don't want to say anything we won't make them. We just try to make sure they can when they want to.
 
The only thing I 'make' the boys say is hello. They're not forced to talk to anyone on the phone, not even us. I figure that I'll have enough trouble keeping them off the phone in a few years; I'm not going to push them to use it now.
 
I don't make my kids talk on the phone (I'm not a big phone talker myself). I think because I don't force them, they are almost willing to least say hi. My 7 y.o. son is actually pretty funny because he's very direct, especially when I talk to him from work. He'll say hi, then tell me one quick thing, then say "okay, so I don't have anything else to talk about, do you?"
 
the only time I "make" them talk is on their birthdays. Other than that.. nope. J sometimes won't talk on the phone, but Abby loves the phone, so it's not usually an issue.
 
i wouldnt make them talk. Though knowing how much grandparents love to hear what the kids are up to, I'd encourage the kids to call them when they've had a good day at school, or done something new etc etc.
 
We don't really talk to grandparents on the phone anymore - it's all about skype in our house now. So yes - he has to talk to them for a few minutes but it's usually not a problem since he's excited to see them on the computer. :)
 
I never make my 2 1/2 year old talk on the phone. She likes talking to grandma and pawpaw but she used to not like talking on the phone. When we were little, parents would makes say thank you for presents over the phone and say hi on special occasions and that but that was it.
 
We live away from relatives as well, so we often communicate by phone....my 7 year old is usually willing to talk on the phone and say hi, but if there is a time she doesn't really want to I don't make her. My 4 year old is another story....it's like pulling teeth to get him to say hi. I used to force it, but it's really not worth it because now it's turned into more of a game for him. LOL. Maybe he'll come around someday haha.
 
No, I've never done this. If they want to talk, they can. If I try to force them, I usually just get "NOOOOOOOOO" and they scream it into the phone. Not fun for the person on the other end!

Amelia is 7, Benjamin is 9 and though they didn't used to like talking on the phone, they talk fine on it now. Rae still doesn't like to, and I don't make her.
 
If they didn't want to talk I wouldn't make them. My 2 never stop though talking and always love speaking to their grandparents on the phone, although they do run out of things to say, so sit quietly whilst they think of something. :D
 
Thanks, everyone! It doesn't seem right to me to force them either. I know all the grandparents are disappointed when the boys don't want to talk, but hopefully when they're older they'll choose to talk more often.
 
I dont force them to talk but they see their relatives so often that it was never an issue. The thing is though I have been on the other side where I dont get to see my neice that often. Like sometimes 6-8 months in between visits so when I call I do get kinda upset if she wont get on the phone because she does not feel like talking. Usually my sister will make her at least say hello and tell me what she has been doing in school and other stuff. I know she likes talking to me but is usually in the middle of playing a video game or on the computer or with her friends when I call.
 
Erin - we started doing Skype, too! the kids LOVE it!

Also, my kids beg to call my mom every day. they love to tell her about everything going on (they had to call her to tell her about the snow before we could leave the house, LOL!). They love to get on and tell stupid jokes, too. So I don't have any advice, sorry!!

(except that maybe your parents could try to make it more fun for them? Maybe they could tell the kids some jokes? that way they'd look forward to it...)
 
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