I took Rae to her preschool orientation today. It was for 1 hour, and we got to stay today. Our preschool is a private one, run by a young teacher. She takes 4 kids per class, two part days a week. We were lucky enough that she taught Benjamin and Amelia, and a spot just opened up for Rae a couple of weeks ago. She is brilliant with the kids, and they loved her very much.
Our school year cut off is January 1st, Rae's birthday is November 8th. She is only 3, but will start kindergarten next Sept, and she will only be 4. I took her in today, and I met the other kids that are in her class etc. Two were Spring babies, Rae and the other boy were November babies. I didn't realize just how small she was (she's only 29 pounds) until then, and also, how far behind she seems.
She knows her colors, shapes, and numbers. She knows some letters and can color inside the lines. However, we have a problem with her following directions, sitting still, and she won't let me teach her anything at home, which is why she cannot print any letters. She went to the orientation today, didn't pay attention to the teacher, didn't follow directions.
About 1 1/2 years ago, I started working from home, right about the time I would have begun doing some work with her (which I did with the other two). She is very small for her age, and I guess time just passed me by, and now she's in school, but she acts very much like a toddler still. I love my work, and love that I am home with them, but I wonder sometimes if I wouldn't have been better off taking her to a sitter/day care where she may have gotten more undivided attention than I could give her. I feel so guilty, the other two came out just fine, went to preschool at age 4, and ACTED like they were 4, but Rae is just so tiny, so small and toddlerish.
It's all my fault, the other kid that was there, born in November, had no problems doing anything she asked. I am really concerned that she is just not mature enough, since she is still dealing with Terrible Threes, and having trouble speaking properly at this point. I feel so sad, I know I should have spent more time with her, should have tried harder, and should have been there for her more. I'm so incredibly sad. I don't want her to be left behind, and with the way the school cut offs are, I will have to send her to kindy next year at age 4. So I need to get her adjusted somewhat over the winter.
Has anyone else gone through something similiar? I feel so guilty that I have let her fall behind, even though she is seemingly very bright. I feel badly that I was able to devote the time to my older two, but not to her. I took the time after the session to speak to the teacher, who I obviously know very well by now, and let her know that she is much further behind than my other two kids were at this point. She told me that she would be honest with me, and thought that we should give it a couple of months to see how she does, before we take her out.
Thanks for listening to me whine
