Skipping grade levels

[aggiefamily]

Garrett's teacher sent home information today about skipping Kindergarten and going to 1st grade. He would take an assessment with the school counselor and those results would determine if he could skip Kindergarten.

Garrett is very advanced in language arts and math but not so much in fine motor skills. He is also right on track emotionally for a 5 year old (he will be 6 in November). I think he is the oldest in his class.

He can read close to a 2nd grade level and is at a 1st grade level in math. His handwriting is not at a 1st grade level but that is the subject that we struggle with.

The teacher in me says he is ready and would do well but the mommy in me knows that he might not be emotionally ready.

My question is have you or would you advance your child? What effect will this have down the road? I am worried about him being the youngest kid in his grade. Would it make the rest of his school career difficult?

[Sarah8914]

At least he is older! I'm not sure because I don't have school age children yet. I used to not want them to skip grades because of the social aspect of it, but I don't know if it would be a bad thing.

Is it something he could try and if it didn't work go back? Or he could repeat 1st grade? I don't know. I'm no help, sorry!

[Jennilyn]

I skipped grade 1 and was teased because I was so little so in grade 3 I decided to stay back and do it again to be with the kids that were my age. If it were my child, I wouldn't let him/her skip, but that's just me.

[lizzyfizzy]

i started kinder when i was 4! my b-day was in nov so i was only 4 for a short time, but i was the same age your lil guy will be if they move him to 1st...and i turned out alright! (well i'm super weird, but that's besides the point!) when i was 3 and 4 the preschool teachers couldn't keep me busy so my mom made an appointment with the principal, she tested me and put me through. actually, i always felt i had an advantage because of this. graduated when i was 17. i never had a problem fitting in or anything! it was fine! i say if he's smart enough...challenge him! btw, dd is a 5th grader and she just tested advanced on two different standadized measures. she will be doing junior high math this year! i love that!

[AddictedScrapper]

Boy that seems like a tough decision because you don't want him bored in Kindergarten but you also don't want him to feel "left out" around the older kids. I honestly am not sure what I would do, that's a tough decision.

[lizzyfizzy]

and honestly, there is not a huge difference in kindergartners and 1st graders...size wise, IMO. my youngest ds is a smaller child and a lot of people think he is a 1st grader (purely size wise).

[breakingbrie]

I didn't skip grades as a kid, and my girls aren't school age yet, but I turned 5 right before starting kindergarten, and I was always the youngest in my class and also was 17 when I graduated. Some of my friends in my grade were close to 2 years older. This is probably no help to you, but my girls' bday is in august, and I'm hoping they'll be ready for kindergarten right after they turn 5. If they're not, that's cool too(some schools have a cutoff you have to turn 5 before...), but I'm just hoping they'll be ready, I won't push them. I myself didn't mind being the youngest, and I never had any problems because of it.
LOL, I'm sure I'm no help!

[kscwgirl]

I skipped Kindy. Well.. I was in Kindy for 6 weeks and then went to 1st grade. I didn't have any problems through my schooling at all. Only thing I really remember that upset me was that I couldn't tie my shoe.. and I remember going up to this girl and asking her to tie my shoe..w hich was huge for me.. and we became best friends and remained that way.

[Misty Cato]

It'd be ideal if you could get him in a kindy class with a teacher who is willing to work with him by helping him select books appropriate to his reading level and providing more challenging math activities. That way he could stay with his age group and still not be bored with the lessons.

I was in a similar situation in grade school and stayed with my classmates. However whenever I finished a lesson quickly, instead of offering something challenging or interested, my teacher would give me more of the same worksheets. I quickly learned to take my time so I wouldn't get so much work, lol. To state the obvious, having a good teacher is really important.

[ColleenSwerb]

Now, I don't have kids, and I didn't skip a grade myself, but I wanted to throw my 2 cents out there, lol.

If you're going to skip a grade, I would think that kindy is the one! If your DS is put with them now, there will be fewer and fewer issues as they are older. He'll stay with the same kids for the rest of his schooling and make friends, etc etc.

[jorgies5]

I kind of had to make the same decision with my daughter this year. Last year, she participated in a pre-K program for kids who turned 5 after the September deadline but before the end of the year. At the end of the pre-k program, they had the option of moving on to first grade or repeating kindergarten. Her pre-K teacher told us she was ready for 1st grade. My husband wanted to move her on and I wanted to have her repeat kindergarten (it is all-day kindergarten).

But I found it very interesting that out of the 50 kids that participated in this program and were eligible to move on to 1st grade, only 3 kids moved onto to first grade. The rest of the parents decided to keep their kids back in kindergarten another year.

I honestly think it depends on each individual child, but I had a lot of educators tell me that it usually catches up in third grade when they are trying to learn multiplication and division. That is when you start seeing the gap.

We kept our daughter in kindergarten, but she definitely isn't as advanced as your son. She doesn't know how to read yet. Of course, I was also thinking about high school and I didn't want her dating older guys, being the youngest, and possibly always struggling to keep up. Just my 2 cents.

Good luck with your decision Amanda!

[MyEbella]

tough tough tough decision...
I have a daughter that will turn 5 right before she is to start kindy...aka days before and I struggle with keeping her back a year...so glad to hear that soo many of you guys did it and thought it was just fine to be the youngest...etc..

but on the other hand our son is starting kinder this next week and very well could be in 1st grade (along w/ half his class) they all did the kinder work last year in 4yr preschool.... so that said...

I do not think I would skip him up a grade! Talk w/ the teacher and principal and maybe he does some 1st grade work or goes to their classroom for certain subject...almost best of both worlds...

maybe the teacher can alter his assigments at times!

it is young and he can't make the decision himself!

good luck!

[newfiemountiewife]

Originally Posted by BrodoNY0123

Now, I don't have kids, and I didn't skip a grade myself, but I wanted to throw my 2 cents out there, lol.

If you're going to skip a grade, I would think that kindy is the one! If your DS is put with them now, there will be fewer and fewer issues as they are older. He'll stay with the same kids for the rest of his schooling and make friends, etc etc.

I agree with this, they wanted to skip 1st grade for me, but my mom decided not to do it...I can't remember why she didn't. I would think that by doing it now, you might not have the issues with the "smallness" or whatever, because he will grow up with the same kids.

Is there an option to try it, and if the 1st grade teacher thinks he should go back, maybe try that?

Amelia is almost 6 (Jan 21) and missed cut off by 3 weeks. She'll be starting kindergarten this fall. Her little friend has a birthday in December, so she'll be starting at age 4. So there's a HUGE age difference just in one grade, so honestly, I think he'll be ok there. But of course, it's something you really have to think about!

If it were me, I would do it, just my 2C of course!

[scrappycharmer]

I was offered to skip 2nd grade. My parents did not let me. Instead I went to 3rd grade for Reading and math. It worked out ok for me. I hated doing that but I survived. haha!

With my kids - both started young (4) in Kindergarten. They both have October bdays. They have both been fine - academically and maturity wise. There are times I wish I had held DS back to give him that being a bigger kid advantage. He does struggle with school more than DD but I think that is the boy girl thing. He is not as interested in it. He'd rather be out throwing a ball or riding his bike.

I think if your son is that far advance and age wise he falls into the range - Go ahead and try it. If he has to repeat you can move him to a new teacher next year and at that age - kids are less likely to tease. I would not do it at a higher grade though.

[mrsmbm]

I am going to have to face this decision soon with my almost four year old. The teacher in me is fighting with the parent in me! On one hand, I don't want her to be bored, but if I keep her back (her birthday is October 20) then she'll be more of a leader than a follower later on down the schooling road...she'll be bigger and faster (for sports, as DH always points out!) and she'll be the first one driving and dating, as opposed to the last...

It's a tough call! Good luck with your decision!

[my3hens]

I wish I had some good insight on this but definitley think you got some good advice from both perspectives. Lots of luck honey! I know whatever you decide to do you will do whats best for your child!

[BrattyMeg]

I think behavior wise, it would be an advantage to skip him into first grade (in TX kindy isn't required anyways is it??) My son gets in trouble when he's bored in class, so for that aspect it woudl be worth it. Academically you want to challenge your child and if 1st grade would challenge him and not have him "fall back" to a K level then definitely look into it.

[robinforman]

My only thought to add to this is this.... if the teacher feels (after having seen him in class for two days?) that he is that much more advanced than the other students, perhaps more of a challenge would not be a bad thing, ya know?

I would definitely say go ahead with the assessment- at least then you have all of the information on the table. The assessment could go one of two ways, only one of which requires you to make a decision in regards to moving him up. At least then you would know all of your options, right? It would also give the teacher (new or kinder) the specific skills that he is strong in, as well as those that he will need to work on.

Good luck- tough decision!

[tanbanan]

personally, i think there are more advantages to being the oldest in the grade, rather than the youngest. my mom taught 6th grade for 30 years and she said that the leaders in her class usually had fall birthdays and she could pick them out in the first week of school.

i made my dd the oldest in her grade level, she has an end of Aug birthday, and i'm SO GLAD that i did!

good luck with your decision!

[LeeAndra]

Maybe your school could do what mine did for me?

While I did not technically skip a grade, six weeks into first grade, they moved four other first graders and me into general second grade classes with other second graders. I was still a first grader, but only took second grade classes and did second grade work. I had taught myself to read the summer before first grade, so that was not a problem for me. There were also a handful of 'slower' third graders in the second grade unit I was in and one did pick on me for a couple months, but otherwise, I don't really remember feeling different from the other kids. Even being younger, I always read the most books and won all the reading awards.

When I got to my third, fourth, and fifth years, one of the teacher aides would take those other kids that had moved up and me out of class for an hour or so 2x a week to do special projects.

At the point that I would have been moved onto middle school, which was sixth grade, they kept me 'back' with the kids my actual age, and I did a combination of enrichment activities and being put in the highest classes of the grade level for that school year.

Since I only did this through elementary school, it was not really a permanent skip, and I doubt any of my middle or high school friends even realized what I had done. I was still not as challenged as I could have been, but I and my parents definitely appreciated the effort the school system went to in order to accomodate me.

HTH!

[ditzyscrap]

If he's almost 6, I would consider moving him ahead. Mason started Kindy at 4 (his b-day is also in November, so he's the youngest in his class - but not the smallest, he's actually bigger than most of the boys, and there are only a couple girls taller than him). If he's going to be bored in his core subjects, then I would consider moving him up - the grade 1 teacher should help him with the areas where he struggles (all kids have their weaknesses, doesn't matter their age or whether they skipped over kindy). Mason was going to be held back because he was behind socially (having been around only adults his entire life, basically - all he knew was parents, grandparents, aunts/uncles and doctors and nurses)...but he quickly caught up to the other kids in that area - he's a bit behind but they're going to continue working with him now that he's in grade 1.

It's up to you, obviously, but I would move him ahead if I was given the option. Almost 6 is not too young for grade 1 (Mason will be 6 in November as well).

[aggiefamily]

I am so torn! I talked to my SIL (she teaches 1st in the same district) and she is going to come over and benchmark test him for me. I am calling the counselor tomorrow to talk to her about it also.

Who know- he might not even do good on all the tests and then I can go back to worrying about how to get my 3 year old from peeing outside.

[BrattyMeg]

Originally Posted by aggiefamily

I can go back to worrying about how to get my 3 year old from peeing outside.

good luck..the 2 boys in my life (DH and DS) still pee off the deck...not sure it can be cured lmbo

[joelsgirl]

I have a good friend who's daughter skipped Kindergarten, and she did great in school academically, but she really struggled once she got to high school and the responsibilty increased because she wasn't really mature enough to handle it. In fact, she just graduated and they're not sending her to college yet because they don't feel like she's mature enough to live on her own.


Tough decision; good luck making it!

[Brandy]

Originally Posted by aggiefamily

then I can go back to worrying about how to get my 3 year old from peeing outside.

LOL Amanda!! No real advice but that last part gave me a laugh i needed thanks lol.

[arenee]

My stepson has been the youngest in his class since 1st grade. He is now in 11th grade. He has said that he wishes he was a grade lower. All of his friends can drive. He was the smallest for a long time but he has gotten taller.

If I had it to all over again I would hold him back because even though I thought he was emotionally ready, he wasn't quite.......

That being said, each child has a cross to bear. Each thing that happens is a learning experience. So what ever you decide, is the best for your child right now. Hindsite is always 20/20!!

Good luck
Renee

[SeattleSheri]

I didn't read any of the other responses, so hopefully this is not completely duplicative. I started kindergarten a year early after taking a cognitive assessment exam. My birth day is in very late December. I did not have a problem fitting in. I was, however, always smaller and lacked confidence, which I do attribute to my young age. There were always children up to two years older than me in my classes, which is a big difference for young children (more socially, than academically). Also, if your child is in sports, they will have a greater chance to excel with more advanced physical development. Most school curriculums will accommodate different skill levels. I definitely think it's something to explore and I think it's great that you are researching it. From my perspective, if I had to do it over again, I would have preferred to be with classmates that were the same age as me. I think there is so much more to grade leveling than academic excellence, and sometimes I think schools do not give other developmental aspects enough consideration when advancing children. Good luck with your decision!

[alansrock]

I say leave him where he is and not skip K. From all the reading I have done from books Dr. James Dobson has done about boys they aren't emotionally ready for school until age 7 so I think you are doing your DS a favor by keeping him where he is and let him be the oldest in the class. In fact Dr. Dobson's books are a key factor as to why I home schooling right now so that I can know their strengths & weaknesses so that I can help them when they need help for when they do go to school one day.

[stayawake]

This is a tough one. I would say give a try to the assessment and make your decision based on that... I would worry more about a child being challened and fed than being a little smaller than kids his age. Children who are really bright can really flourish in the younger years and have good self confidnece if they are given challenges, if not they learn school is boring, and they feel out of place among their peers even if they are the same 'size'.

I don't know what schooling format are available in your area...but something other than a regular school might give you the best of both worlds? A montessorri school, for instance, groups children by three years or so and gives work to each individual child so they can be always challened and stay with kids around their age. Children may be anywhere in the spectrum of language arts, math, science, etc. and still be learning.

Kumon and other private tutoring locations can give children challengeing math and other work to do outside of school, and some teachers will alow this to be brought into the classroom. For this and the montesorry option of course you are talking $$$...

Another option might be a language immersion school. Here in Canada we have a lot of French Immersion programs, which I'm seriously considering for my daughter (who just turned three on sunday, but can write her name, spell some words, and thinks addition and subtraction are fun 'games' and LOVES languages - she knows some spanish, french and mandarin already and always wants to learn more words!) because it would add a bit of a challenge to a child who is already advanced, but they could stay in their grade level with kids their age. They also tend to be a bit smaller so the child might have more attention from a teacher - and they have a great life skill of another language!
We also have some charter schools, like in my city there is a big arts school, that uses regular curriculum but adds dance, music, art, etc. (this is also a public school).

[aggiefamily]

I started thinking about what my experiences were as a 1st grade teacher and realized that he is just not ready for that. And when I dropped him off today he ran up to his teacher and gave her a big hug and started talking to his classmates. That is huge for Garrett. He is very shy and timid. I can't take that away.

[Emmy]

sounds like you have an idea of what you want to do - but I'll try to catch you on yahoo today amanda

[maryinaz]

This was a decision we had to make with my twins as their birthday is, well, tomorrow. They made the cut-off, but I knew, from research that it's usually best to be older in your grade. There are always exceptions, of course.

Some of the things we considered and helped make our decision, and I thought it out WAY beyond 1st grade:

-In our school, teachers were willing to give them advanced work.
-I talked to the principal, my older boys' gifted teachers/current teachers, family, friends, etc. and 100% said to wait.
-I'd rather MY kids be the first to drive instead of having them ride with their friends - we have more control that way.
-for school sports, they would be bigger, not smaller
-they would be older/more mature for school dances and events
-they would be more mature when it came time for college

It sounds like maybe you've already gotten a sign as to what to do, but good luck with your final decision!