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Old 01-17-2018, 01:35 AM
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Default So this is weird. Ex boyfriend Facebook messaged me because...

he wants graphic design advice.



This is my HIGH SCHOOL boyfriend, my first big love. Last time we talked about about a year and a half ago when he found out that I was getting a divorce (from the guy he was devastated I married).

He is seriously asking for help with a poster. Is this an excuse to talk to me? UGH!

Do your ex's ever contact you?
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Old 01-17-2018, 07:54 AM
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Yep. At first I was very suspicious of him, but later, we ended up just chatting about life and it's all good.
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Old 01-17-2018, 10:45 AM
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I usually don't keep in touch with my exes, because when I am done with something, I am done. I have had some try to reconnect, (the most bizarre is the ex who called to offer condolences on my husband's death and asked me out at the same time. ) but shut that down fast -- after all there was a good reason they were an ex-boyfriend.

Your situation is a little different IF all he is looking for is help with a poster. If you are okay helping him, I say do it. If he tries to turn it into more and you aren't interested, let him know and shut it down.
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Old 01-17-2018, 12:33 PM
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No...thank goodness!
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Old 01-17-2018, 05:33 PM
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Thankfully, no. I didn't even put my maiden name on FB because I didn't want any of them to find me! LOL! I've been with my husband since my senior year in HS (over 30 years. YIKES, I'm old!). Any of my ex-boyfriends would have been from early high school...there's no way I'd want to talk to them!
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Old 01-17-2018, 05:35 PM
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All of my relationships before my husband ended pretty badly. I have a hard time breaking up with people, so when I wished I was done with them, I did little things and treated them pretty bad so they would break up with me instead. Pretty sure none of them are ever coming back, lol. Not exactly proud of that, but whatever
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Old 01-17-2018, 10:39 PM
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I only had 1 serious boyfriend before my husband, and we're still in touch. It's sporadic, more FB friends than anything else these days, but I see him once every 5 years or so when we're in the same state. He was one of my best friends in middle school and high school before we dated (junior and senior years of HS, then back together for a few months in college), and we stayed close after we broke up. I know that remaining friends with an ex once you're with someone new can be a touchy subject, but my ex came out about a year after we broke up. That definitely made it easier for DH not to object to our friendship in college, back when we still saw each other on every visit home and stayed in touch a lot better than we do now.
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Old 01-18-2018, 03:59 PM
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I really only have one ex, and he would never contact me in a billion zillion years.

I wouldn't automatically assume he means anything by it. You do have some graphic design skills, and maybe he saw something you did & reached out as a type of impulse immediately after seeing it, KWIM?

Now asking you lots of personal questions, trying to arrange to talk on the phone or see each other in person, etc. would be a red flag and you could just tell him you're not interested and block him.
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Old 01-19-2018, 04:00 PM
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I have my high school sweetheart and his wife on my Facebook. We met up once like 12 years ago when we all happened to be back home at the same time. We like pictures on each others' pages mostly of the kids and that's about it.
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Old 01-22-2018, 10:32 AM
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I've tried being friends with my ex-husband on social media, and it's just proven not to be a good idea. About a year ago, my high school ex and I became FB friends, and we occasionally chat, but it's never about anything terribly interesting. I think you've already gotten good advice. Offer to help him with the poster, but if the conversation takes a turn you aren't comfortable with, either just shut it down or end it all together.
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Old 01-22-2018, 01:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LJSDesigns View Post
I usually don't keep in touch with my exes, because when I am done with something, I am done. I have had some try to reconnect, (the most bizarre is the ex who called to offer condolences on my husband's death and asked me out at the same time. ) but shut that down fast -- after all there was a good reason they were an ex-boyfriend.

Your situation is a little different IF all he is looking for is help with a poster. If you are okay helping him, I say do it. If he tries to turn it into more and you aren't interested, let him know and shut it down.
and asked you out?! omg

Thanks for the advice, ladies. I'll help him out and keep en eye open for any funny business.
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