View Full Version : Do you think it's tacky...
WalkersMommy
12-19-2009, 06:54 PM
to put this on the back of DS's 2nd bday invites?
"Walker was definitely on the nice list this Christmas and was overwhelmed with gifts. If you still feel inclined to get him a gift, he wears size 2T-3T clothing and loves books and music. These things would be greatly appreciated, but we would love for you to put money towards his classes at The Little Gym, as this is an experience he very much enjoys. You can do this by giving Walker money to keep in his piggy bank until our next payment is due in February."
I just don't want it to sound like we are straight up asking for money, kwim?
MamaBee
12-19-2009, 07:15 PM
I don't think so... if they have kids, they totally know what you are getting at, one can have so many toys... and others will appreciate knowing what the child needs and uses than getting something that would collect dust.
nun69
12-19-2009, 07:20 PM
I don;t think so either...I would LOVE for parents to be forward!!! and I like this idea and may use it for DD's b-day {she will be 4 in Jan 10th} and will definetely not need any toys! so I might ask for money towards some dance lessons!
Misty Cato
12-19-2009, 07:30 PM
Hmmm, while I totally see where you are coming from, there is a part of me that cringes at the idea of a invitation that comes with guidelines for gift-giving, particularly if the underlying tone is 'bring money'. I might just be out of touch with the way things are done though...
carriesmom
12-19-2009, 07:44 PM
Hmmm, while I totally see where you are coming from, there is a part of me that cringes at the idea of a invitation that comes with guidelines for gift-giving, particularly if the underlying tone is 'bring money'. I might just be out of touch with the way things are done though...
I kind of have to agree with Misty. If a parent asks you personally what should I get him by all means tell them what you put above, but it don't think it's appropriate to basically tell everyone we want clothes or cash for his classes. That's just me.
Shawna
12-19-2009, 08:03 PM
I'd probably be okay putting the clothing sizes or asking for new books to add to his own little library on the invite, but I wouldn't be comfortable asking for $$ towards towards gym or dance classes. But that's just me though :)
mummytothree
12-19-2009, 08:06 PM
here's an idea.....create a wishlist/birthday list at WaMart or Target and only reguister for clothes, books and CD's. Then include a little note in the invite about Walker's Wishlist and where to find it. Then you will either get the gifts you desire or people who might not want to go to the trouble of going to that store will probably give you $$. :thumbup:
jovi_girl
12-19-2009, 08:07 PM
Im kinda in the middle. I dont think theres anything wrong with asking people to put money towards his classes. If it were one of my friends kids or my neice, i would love to do that, as they all already have so many clothes and toys.
However, if it were me, im not sure id write it on the invitation....Id probably just tell a few family members and friends and ask them to spread the word around...I think id be a bit worried about offending people.
WalkersMommy
12-19-2009, 08:17 PM
I guess I won't put anything on the invite and just tell them if they ask. I was just thinking about putting it on there because DH's family is the kind that only calls when they need/want something, and I know they won't call to ask what he needs/likes/sizes. I guess if he gets a bunch of stuff he doesn't need I will just donate it :)
Thank you for your input, I really appreciate it because I did not know what to do! lol
WalkersMommy
12-19-2009, 08:29 PM
After reeading these posts... I don't want you guys to think I'm greedy :( lol. I am just overwhelmed with the amount of stuff my kiddo has. I already went through his clothes and have bags for charity and bags for a close friend, and I'm going through his toys tomorrow. My family buys him so much stuff that we literally do not have room for it, and he really only plays with a couple things. I am extremely grateful for everything my family does for him, but I'm just overwhelmed with the clutter, and the thought of getting even more stuff that he won't use for his birthday is making me panic! lol So that's why I thought I would tell people to put money towards his classes, but I completely see what you guys mean about how it sounds, that's why I asked for your opinions :)
Heather Roselli
12-19-2009, 08:45 PM
Does the place that holds the classes offer gift certificates? If they do I don't think asking for books, clothes and GC to such and such a place is a bad thing.
WalkersMommy
12-19-2009, 08:51 PM
Yes they do... I hadn't thought of that. I don't know how it would work with our payment plan though, maybe I should call and ask, lol.
MissKim
12-19-2009, 10:25 PM
Personally, I wouldn't put it on the invitation, but I also wouldn't have any problem telling my close family/friends that instead of toys, we're working on getting him classes at xyz, and they offer gift cards that would be helpful towards that goal. I'd probably even start mentioning it at Christmas. "It's so difficult with his birthday so close to the holidays, so for his birthday, we're going to do this."
Sheana
12-19-2009, 11:04 PM
For me, it depends on who the invitations were going to. Close family and friends- I'd put that on the invitations because they know my girls, know they have an abundance of everything and sincerely wish to give them a gift they'll enjoy (such as a month of dance lessons, etc). Not so close friends, I'd leave it off and just suggest it to them if they ask.
WalkersMommy
12-19-2009, 11:43 PM
For me, it depends on who the invitations were going to. Close family and friends- I'd put that on the invitations because they know my girls, know they have an abundance of everything and sincerely wish to give them a gift they'll enjoy (such as a month of dance lessons, etc). Not so close friends, I'd leave it off and just suggest it to them if they ask.
Yea, I should have specified who is invited. It's just family. And 3 of our best friends who have kids. I wasn't even going to do a party for him since he is getting so much for Christmas, DH is laid off right now, and DS doesn't know any different if he has a party or not, lol, but my family about had a cow when I told them that... so, here we are. lol.
kscwgirl
12-19-2009, 11:48 PM
I sent out an email to my entire family about Christmas presents for my kids. I had a minor hissy fit about it, but that's not important. :D I would send the invites, and then email them all. :)
crecia27
12-19-2009, 11:48 PM
I actually like the idea. Its one of the reasons I don't like inviting school friends to my kids parties because I don't want all the little toys we end up with. I just feel its so wasteful. And we seriously don't need another book - my MIL was an elementary school teacher for 40 years and gave us her collection when she retired, we could start our own library!
carriesmom
12-19-2009, 11:55 PM
After reeading these posts... I don't want you guys to think I'm greedy :( lol. I am just overwhelmed with the amount of stuff my kiddo has. I already went through his clothes and have bags for charity and bags for a close friend, and I'm going through his toys tomorrow. My family buys him so much stuff that we literally do not have room for it, and he really only plays with a couple things. I am extremely grateful for everything my family does for him, but I'm just overwhelmed with the clutter, and the thought of getting even more stuff that he won't use for his birthday is making me panic! lol So that's why I thought I would tell people to put money towards his classes, but I completely see what you guys mean about how it sounds, that's why I asked for your opinions :)
I will say that I didn't think you were being greedy at all! I completely understand your thought behind what you want to do and your heart is absolutely in the right place. I just personally think that the back on the invite is not the best place for it. A phone call or an email would be better.
NettieB
12-20-2009, 01:37 AM
i get in trouble with my in-laws and nana because the only things on my wish lists are gift cards for classes for my son, digi stores or others.
Then i usually sit on them until I have a bunch and buy the Really Big Thing i want. Taking them with us to a class really got them to buy into the whole sponsoring classes for my son, really recommend this if you can swing it. It also finally sunk in when I wore the coat i "saved" up for while thanking my MIL profusely as we were attending some function together . . .
so - it's how you handle it - and more importantly, what is important for the giver to give and see received. Everybody just wants their gift to be really appreciated. How much you need to "cheer-lead" or not . . . it's kinda a case by case deal, KWIM?
emmasmommy
12-20-2009, 09:01 AM
I would send the invites, and then email them all. :)
I like Sara's idea. It's not too confrontational but it gets the point across. My family is really good about calling to ask what the girls "need," so when they call I'll tell them the truth. They've often heard, "PLEASE DO NOT GIVE THEM MORE TOYS!" :)
wvasweetness
12-20-2009, 09:53 AM
I like Sara's idea. It's not too confrontational but it gets the point across. My family is really good about calling to ask what the girls "need," so when they call I'll tell them the truth. They've often heard, "PLEASE DO NOT GIVE THEM MORE TOYS!" :)
I like this idea too!
But I have to say that I would not at all mind if invites came with ideas or lists (or links to lists online) of what the kid wants/needs. Its hard shopping for other ppl's kids b/c even if we're close to them - I don't know EVERY toy, book and outfit that they have.
Paula
12-20-2009, 11:03 AM
Fairon, you didn't sound greedy in your post. I can totally relate to where you are coming from. When mine were little they had SO much stuff that I was overwhelmed at the mere idea of throwing them parties! LOL
I like Heather's idea of gift certificates and I like Sara's idea of emailing. Since it's all close family and friends, they would probably understand. I wouldn't be offended in the least if one of my family members or close friends suggested to me about the class. I would actually prefer to give them something that I know they would use.
Sharon Kay
12-20-2009, 11:04 AM
I would think if the family knows of dh's employment status...they would prob ask...or would hope so. I think more like a phone call rather than a list on the back of the invite would be better. Why not do a verbal invitation instead of a written since it is "family" and that gives you a chance to talk about the class over the phone as a suggestion.
WalkersMommy
12-20-2009, 03:11 PM
Thank you ladies! I'm going to send out the invites without anything about gifts, and then talk to the family that I will see at Christmas about it then. If DH's family doesn't call to see what he needs/wants/likes... we'll just deal with it after the party, lol. :)
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