NSBR: talk to me about tubal ligation...

[breakingbrie]

Any one had this done? I've been thinking about it for a loooooong time. I was the girl who never wanted to have my own. Even when I got with dh, I told him I didn't want any, but I'd think about it. The pregnancy wasn't planned, I was on the patch. I am glad I have Cait and Chloe now, can't imagine being without them! But I don't want any more kids. I'm sure of it. I've got a bunch of reasons, but the only thing is dh says he might want another one. -He wants a boy. I hate bc. I'm on a pill right now that I don't like, while it's helping with some problems, it's a pain - my hair is still growing back from the massive handfuls I lost when I first got on it, I don't have regular periods(I miss the feeling of reassurance that came with them) and it's causing some more personal problems too. I've tried other kinds of bc, and some I refuse to try. I just want to be tied already!

Anyways, anyone here had it done? Are you glad you did? Any complications from having it done? I hear it's better to be cauterized than tied... I've got an appt coming up and I'm going to talk to gyno about it, but I wanted to get some thoughts on it from you girls first, if any of you had it done and are willing to talk about it.

Oh, and also I'm turning 30 :blink: this year, and gyno has mentioned increased chances for bc to cause problems in women over 30.

[nikkiARNGwife]

I had one done after Ella was born last year. Perfectly happy with it...mine were cauterized and as far as I know I haven't had any problems from it.

It's really kind of ironic..we went through infertility for a total of 5 years..3 yrs prior to DS and two with DD...DD was actually an "accident" b/c we had given up and didn't think we'd have any more..I got pregnant with her when I was almost 34...so after she was born..I knew I didn't want anymore surprises at this age..I had to have a section so he just did it while he was in there. lol..he actually poked his head over the screen and said "you're sure you want me to cut them" and I said..yep cut away lol.

I hadn't been on birth control since I was 25..but I do remember what a pain they were..I much prefer not having to worry about a thing :)

[Kara]

Oh I'm so glad you asked this. I'm wondering the same thing. I'm like Nikki, dealt with infertility before have DS #1 and then DS #2 and DD were both surprises. I love my kids but think we're done - and I too hate any kind of hormonal birth control.

I looked into Essure, the non-surgical option, but was scared off by the horror stories of what can go wrong. I'm trying to convince DH to get the big V -- after all, if I delivered three kids with no pain medication, the least he can do is get the snip-snip, right? ;)

[nikkiARNGwife]

Oh I will add that I only had my tubes done b/c I ended up having to have a section...if I hadn't DH was going to get a vasectomy...I would really consider that if it's an option for you...I mean I know they think it is the worst thing ever..but really it's a minor procedure for them vs. major surgery for you if they have to cut you just for the tubal kwim?

[Emmy]

I'm probably going to have a tubal done this spring. I did the consult for it last week at my post partum follow up visit. I have friends that have done essure or the mirena IUD but neither appeals to me (essure = foreign objects in my body and the mirena is unnecessary since I want permanent). I am pretty sure that cauterizing is the standard now and the term "getting your tubes tied" refers to the old way.

My dh has a consult for the big V in a few weeks, I think we are both going to go for it just to make *extra* sure. :p

[Misty Cato]

I'm much like Nikki - my second was a planned c-section and we knew she was going to be our last, so I had the tubal ligation while they were in there with the c-section. I've had no issues or regrets.

[tuneskids]

I had a tubal done when my youngest was 4 months old. I have never had a c-section, so it wasn't an option to do it at that time.
My tubal was done as day surgery,called Laparoscopy, where they make two small incisions and do the work via camera instead of being cut open. I had mine clamped, as I was under 30 and they won't do it any other way at the age I was (even though I already had 4 children and knew I was 100% done). I went home that day, in about as much pain as I would be in during my period.
I can say that since my tubal though, my periods are more painful than they were before I had it done, and the period is so much different than it was before as well (much heavier flows for a few days, tapering off and then coming back). I don't regret it, I just wish I could have convinced DH to get snipped instead (he has issues with needles, doctors and hospitals and so on).

[MandaT]

I don't really have any advise, but I can give you my opinion in a couple months. I will be having it done when this baby is born (5weeks or less), he'll be a planned C-section.

A total suprise & we were avioding 'it' like a plague, so DH could get snipped this winter...

[nun69]

dude...a vasectomy is the way too go!!! but if your DH wants maybe one more child then he might not be so willing! After I had two accidents {#3 and #4} DH was ALL about it and had it when Peyton was 4 months old...said he would do it again!funny thing is I had a consult to get my tubes tied when baby #3 was 4 months old...yeah they never called me back to get the procedure and guess what!!!! baby # 4 arrived about a year later...and I tell at the age of 39 {almost 40} those 2 little ones are driving me crazy!!!

[MissKim]

I want to have something permanent done, however, I am mostly on b/c because my periods are so erratic and the PMS is horrifying without them. In fact, I went down to the mini-pill and the PMS was so bad that I ended up with severe depression. Ending up needing anti-depressants to get me over that hump, along with the pill.

I'd try to talk dh into a vasectomy, but again, if I'm going to have to take the pill anyway, why bother?

[jessica31876]

I had a tubal done after my son was born. I had a c-section and they did it at the same time my son was born. I have some complications which my doctor assures me are not a result of the tubal. Maybe they arent but every person I talk to says they experience the same thing. Those things are heavier periods, more painful periods and weight gain. None of those are horrible and like I said the dr says it is not related to the tubal but all three of my sisters had a tubal and experienced all of these things AFTER the tubal. I do not regret having the tubal though because the freedom it gave my husband and I is so worth it!! And the cost of the birth control over such a long period really does add up!!

[breakingbrie]

I thank you girls for being so open about this! I would have made the decision to have dr. do it when I had the girls - c-section - but I swear, it never crossed my mind! lol, I totally completely forgot about it. Someone asked me a week later if I had them tied while he was in there, and I was like :doh:!! lol, I couldn't believe I forgot to talk to my dr about it the whole time I was pregnant, and he never brought it up!!

Has anyone had to convince their hubby? I'm not sure if he really does want another one, he does talk about how he can't wait til the girls are moved out on their own already!! lol. I know he wants to be young enough that we can still have some fun(I think he's a little worried he can't have fun if he's 'old' - no idea though, what age = old to him) It's just been brought up a few times by me, and while he hasn't suggested that we try to get pregnant, he just mentions that he'd like to have a boy... He may also just not know how seriously I want to have this done. I'll be armed with info, though when I come home from my appt, and I'll have the serious talk. I do feel like it should be partly his decision, as he does say it's me he wants to be with, I don't know if this is a dealbreaker! But then I guess I'd have to decide if it would be a dealbreaker for me... I just know how I feel.

Thanks for the input though ladies!!

[Leila]

Well, I'm still hoping to have at least one, maybe two more children, so what I say here is based on other people I know.

One friend had her tubes 'tied' after her youngest was born and she went from having normal, regular cycles to bleeding 3 weeks of the month to the point where she was using 3-4 overnight pads AND super tampons an hour. She finally had a hysterectomy after dealing with all that for two years. Hers is probably the worst case I know of, but the others all complained of heavier more painful periods, less predictable cycles and weight gain (though it wasn't much weight gain in any case).

Tubal ligation is just something I'd avoid at all costs especially if Andrew can and will have a vasectomy done. (He's willing, when we're finally done having children. As matter of fact, he feels that it's the least he can do after me going through pregnancy.)

[livyryan]

I was going to have a tubal after surprise #2 was born in march. Hubby and I had talked about it and decided to have it done. I told my gyno that I wanted to have it done she was going to do the surgery in the hospital after I had my daughter, she said she would do it even if I didn't have a c section just so I wouldn't have to go through recovery again. I was all for it, ready to get it done and not have to go back on the pill after having her. I have the baby and hubby changes his mind all the sudden, I don't know if he wants to try to have a boy but he keeps saying we are done, no clue why he wouldn't let me go through with it. I thought it would just be easier for me, we had already hit my deductible with the birth and dr visits anyway so we wouldn't have had to pay for it but he told me not to do it. I just turned thirty last year but I was ready to be done. Now he makes me think about having another one when I thought we were done. Now we are paying 40 a month for BC, I was then going to do the IUD but my insurance doesn't cover anything for that so I would have had to pay 1000 for it to be done.

[melmos75]

I didn't have a tubal but I did have the Essure procedure done. (www.essure.com) I took a day off work to have it done and was able to go back to work the next day. 3 months after having the procedure, I went in for a check where they insert dye into your uterous and watch through xay where the dye goes. I was able to see with my own eyes that my tubes were blocked. I haven't noticed any side effects other than the first couple days of my period being a little heavier.

[rachaelsscraps]

I haven't had it done (I don't yet know if I'm done having kids or not yet) but my mom did after baby #7. lol. She hasn't had any problems at all from it and she's glad she doesn't have to do birth control.

[Serendipity]

My second child was planned c-section and my OB asked if it was something I wanted and I signed those papers without blinking!! None of the BC options were right for me and we're happy with two kids so it was a pretty easy decision. Also, DH was pretty relieved that he didn't have to get snipped *cough*wuss*cough*

She did give me the option of having them tied or cauterized and I chose to cauterize. I've had no complications and no regrets about having it done. The only thing that's different is that my periods are heavier and I'm somewhat crampier than I used to be but honestly, I thought that's just how it was after having two kids. I never even thought to connect it to the tubal until I read a thread (I think here?) about it. Still totally worth it! Would do it again! Five Stars! Two Thumbs up! - You get the idea

[nikkiARNGwife]

I can't really compare the before/after periods. Mine have always been pretty heavy etc. b/c I have mild endo. So..if they're heavier I haven't really noticed..but even so, I think dealing with that for a few days is better than the worry of b/c pills.

And my DH was soo relieved too when we found out we had to have a section with DD. When I called him to tell him ( he was deployed at the time) that was the FIRST thing he said.."good I won't have to get snipped now"! Dork. lol...but he was going to have it done while he was deployed to DC so yeah..he was relieved. Men are babies lol

[crecia27]

I got mine done after my second unplanned :-) I was actually planning to get it done right before I found out I was pregnant. I just am no good at taking the pill and none of the other options appealed to me. I'm so sure I dont want more I tried to talk my husband into getting a V as well! I had mine done right after my c-section so I didn't have any additional pain or anything but I don't regret it a bit. Its also nice being able to have fun without worrying about any unexpected surprises! ;-)

[Lukasmummy]

If they would do it I would have a hysterectomy tomorrow. I have a lot of medical issues and another pregnancy is really not an option. Dh keeps offering to get a vasectomy and it makes me mad because really how does that help me. The doctors keep telling me that I am too young (25) and I will change my mind I won't my periods have driven me insane since they started 15 years ago. :thumbdown: why can't doctors just accept that as women we know when we are done with having kids. *sigh* sorry that turned into a bit of a rant.

[pam4gators]

By far my tubal was much more painful than my hysterectomy. I had my tubes tied and then 2 yrs later had to have a hysterectomy. I hated the tubal ligation my periods were much heavier and alot more painful. I had the divinci hysterectomy procedure and was fine in like 2 days, I was in pain after the tubal for like 4 days.

[joelsgirl]

I'm much like Nikki - my second was a planned c-section and we knew she was going to be our last, so I had the tubal ligation while they were in there with the c-section. I've had no issues or regrets.

I feel so sad that the world will always be deprived of more beautiful Cato children. People who make children as adorable as yours should not be allowed to do something so permanent!

[kim21673]

We haven't made any permanent decisions yet. I am hoping DH will go in and have the Big "V" when it's time but he is extremely scared of needles. I don't want to be on BC any more so..... and I DO want one more child...we have 3 boys right now and I want to try one more time for that girl!!!! I am sure I will end up with another boy but they're cute so I don't mind! LOL I am going to be 37 in just a few days so things have to happen sooner than later!

[breakingbrie]

I'm actually surprised to see how many men did or were willing to get snipped!! lol, for some reason, I've just never met a guy who would consider that... no way would dh let any form of snipping go on down there! I'm sure it's not as painful as he'd think... lol.

I used to have heavy periods and looooots of cramping before I got on the pill. Right now, I wouldn't mind the cramping if I could have my periods back!! Crazy, never thought I'd say that. :) I just hate the negatives that bc is doing to me, I'm willing to take the cramping and heavy days back!!

[nesser1981]

I had mine done after I had Cooper, the day after actually, I didn't have any issues, you can also look into Essure, its an in office procedure, it can't be reversed.

Any one had this done? I've been thinking about it for a loooooong time. I was the girl who never wanted to have my own. Even when I got with dh, I told him I didn't want any, but I'd think about it. The pregnancy wasn't planned, I was on the patch. I am glad I have Cait and Chloe now, can't imagine being without them! But I don't want any more kids. I'm sure of it. I've got a bunch of reasons, but the only thing is dh says he might want another one. -He wants a boy. I hate bc. I'm on a pill right now that I don't like, while it's helping with some problems, it's a pain - my hair is still growing back from the massive handfuls I lost when I first got on it, I don't have regular periods(I miss the feeling of reassurance that came with them) and it's causing some more personal problems too. I've tried other kinds of bc, and some I refuse to try. I just want to be tied already!

Anyways, anyone here had it done? Are you glad you did? Any complications from having it done? I hear it's better to be cauterized than tied... I've got an appt coming up and I'm going to talk to gyno about it, but I wanted to get some thoughts on it from you girls first, if any of you had it done and are willing to talk about it.

Oh, and also I'm turning 30 :blink: this year, and gyno has mentioned increased chances for bc to cause problems in women over 30.

[Stacey42]

My husband went for the snip after I ended up being able to have a VBAC. Had I had to have a second c-section I would have had a tubal while the doc was in there but since I avoided that DH stepped up for the V. He did put it off 8 months but when I had to go buy an EPT because I was 99% certain I was pg again he dashed off to make the call. Turned out to be a false alarm on my part, but he had the proceedure 2 weeks later. He spent a day with an ice bag on his parts and was fine after that.

I actually know about 8 husbands who have had the V. Once DH decided to get it done they all came out of the closet. :)

[ryliesmom]

I had Essure done when DS was 3 months old. I was acutally going to have a tubal the day after he was born but my epidural did not take so they were going to have to put me completely under and then since it was elective, surgery got backed up that day and it would have meant a longer hospital stay. We talked with the doctors extensively and decided to go with Essure. It was so quick, easy, and pretty painless. It is permanent, but has very high success rates. I have had no problems with it like the very heavy periods and bad cramping friends have had with a tubal. I'm very happy with my decision.

[nesser1981]

As far as the period thing, here's what I can tell you, I do have a heavier flow now, but I was always on BC before my kids where born, only off it of it for a few months when we were TTC, so I can't say if my tubal caused it to be heavier or lack of BC. I think its lack of BC personally.

[Milmomma]

I've not had good luck with bc ever. From throwing up blood, to bleeding for three months straight. I'm now on the pill and miss my periods as often as I have them. I begged them to just gut me after my daughter. I have always had horrible cramps/heavy & long periods. Bc just seems to make it all worse. Both of my kids were early and I won't be having any more. Two is our magical number. Well this year after some testing has gone bad, I may finally get gutted. Though I have to say now as I'm actually facing the fact that it is necessary for my health, its a lot more nerve racking and scary. Before it was my choice and not having the choice almost makes you not want to do it. I know it sounds silly. I too never wanted kids, even told dh that. Then we had one then another. And now we are both happy with our two. He had planned to get the V when we got back to the states in a few years. He will be happy he doesn't have to.
I vote you make sure you and your husband are on the same page as far as the kid issue first. Even if it is your body, he is your mate. Beyond that it sounds like heavy periods and bad cramps are the side effects. I've dealt with at least that most of my life. It sucks but is livable :)

[Shawna]

I had it done about half an hour after Kyle was born and have not regretted it once. My DH had mentioned getting snipped a few months before I got pregnant with Kyle but I wanted one more baby so I wouldn't let him get it done. Since I was already going to be in the hospital we decided it was easier for me to get the tubal instead, he's our third and we knew we were definitely done so I discussed it with my doctor at my first OB appointment when I was pregnant with him so she knew to plan for it. My epidural didn't get put in til about 15min before he was born since I progressed so fast so they really had to up the meds once they got me back to surgery cause I could feel everything she was doing at first. My procedure was laprascopic so my recovery time was minimal, though I will say that most of my postpartum pain was from the tubal not the actual birth! The area around my bellybutton was really sore and tender for a few days but that was about it. I do have heavier periods now, but my cycle has changed after each birth anyway so it's possible it would have been heavier regardless of the tubal being done. It's great not having to worry about BC now though :)

[oohlala]

My husband and I went in for the V consult. The doctor's office was a mess. Dust everywhere, magazines piled up. One of the mags had "Lady Di's New Spring wardrobe"... yikes (this was 2004.. she had already died!) I was real concerned, so I told him that we would make an apt and talk to my doctor. The OB/GYN set up the surgical apt, and two weeks prior I found out I was pregnant.

The day after DS was born I was taken into surgery and had the tubal. I haven't had any problems. My periods are the same. I did have to be put totally under b/c my epidural didn't work (I had 3!!... and my son was 10lbs 6 oz.) I laughed when the doctor asked... are you sure?

When I went back for the post op visit, my OB/GYN said that it isn't uncommon for people to schedule a tubal and then turn up pregnant.

So all in all we had a positive experience.