Ideas please

[pimaprincess84]

I have been lurking here for awhile, but this is my first time really coming out of the woodwork. This seems like such a supportive community and I would really appreciate any advice you might have.

My husband left for basic training today, and my son (18 months) is already suffering big time. His daddy has been the one who has stayed home with him pretty much since he was born. We got a build a bear with daddy's voice, and he recorded some videos of himself reading some favorite books. Any tips on things that I can do to help him through the next five months?

[MamaBee]

I have no advice... but wanted to welcome you to SSD!!! And hugs to you and your kiddo!

[jessica31876]

What about one of these:

https://www.daddydolls.com/categories

[heathergw]

I also don't have any ideas... but want to welcome you to SSD and send you some (((hugs)))

[MommaTrish]

I also have no ideas. :( ((hugs)) What a tough spot to be in.
But I would like to welcome you!

[newfiemountiewife]

Welcome! I have no ideas, but I know a couple of the other ladies deal with deployments and whatnot, so they should have some for you!

[taracotta7]

There are several military wives here so I am sure they will chime in on some ideas. I think what you have already done is a GREAT start. I would just keep showering him with love, attention and reassurances. (which I am sure you already are!) :)

Welcome to our community! I am so glad you came here! ((HUGS)) to you and your boy!

[jacinda]

Maybe you could make a Daddy Box for your little one. Find a shoe box, and let him decorate it with whatever you have on hand (paint, stickers, glitter etc). Put inside it, a collection of things that remind him of Daddy. Like a 4x6 flip album of Daddy & son photos, Daddys hat/cap. Then whenever Dad sends him something in the mail, it goes into the Daddy box too. Tell Dad to send little trinkets (can be anything really....a small toy, whistle, car etc) in the mail. If he can't do it, you do it, and have your little one check the mailbox once or twice a week for his Daddy mail. Keep the box somewhere accessible, so your son can go into it whenever he wants. I did these for my girls when DH last deployed, though they were 3 and 6 at the time. They loved them, and really understood how special it was to have a Daddy box. The younger one frequently went to the box, and proudly showed it off to any and all visitors. Even now DH is home, she still keeps it in her room and looks through it now and then. DH would send stickers, unit pins, etc and she kept them all.

Hubby deployed for 6 months when our first child was 18mths old. She took it in stride then, as she was really a mummy's girl at that stage. This latest deployment was harder on the 3yr old this time because she's a daddy's girl, but with lots of reassurance, patience and love, we got through. It will be hard for him to make regular contact during basic training, but use every opportunity for the little one to hear his voice, and have lots of photos around the house at his level.

The first 2 weeks are always the hardest, then you get into your own routine, and it's not so bad. Hugs to you both - I'm sure you'll be just fine.

[nikkiARNGwife]

DH deployed when my son was 3 mos and was gone until he was 15 months..that one was harder on me b/c I had a new baby and he was in Afghanistan. The hard part with that deployment was when DH came home and had a toddler when he left a newborn behind..it took them a few days to get to know each other.

He then deployed again when DS was 3. That one was much harder on Avery. I talked to him about Daddy all the time. We looked a pictures and tried to skype or talk on the phone with him every day. I kept him involved with care packages every month and just made sure he knew that his Daddy was always thinking about him.

It's really hard..but kids adjust and I'm sure yours will too. It'll get easier as the days go by I promise.

[Sue Setiadji]

My dh travels on a regular basis but not for these long time frames. My dd's are teens and tweens now and Daddy coming and going has been a part of their lives since they were born.

Love that when he is home though he can totally relax and spend time with them mid week as well as on weekends. I can only say it gets a little easier as time goes on but its really important to keep the communication up - Think you are on the right track with your ideas so far!

Welcome to the SSD family!

[pimaprincess84]

Wow thank you so much for all the support. I LOVE the idea of the daddy box and will definitely try to find a box to put this into action. I also put that link for the daddy dolls into a file, I might look into it more later. Thanks again for the ideas, and the support.

[Milmomma]

When mine were that little with daddy gone, I always had laminated pictures of him. Cause my kids would carry them around and they needed to be damage/water proof. They where a worn mess by the time daddy got home. And we would send their best coloring they did that week to daddy at the end of the week. :)

[JulieB146]

When I was little in 1968/69, my dad went to Vietnam to serve on an aircraft carrier. What he did was make voice tape mails on those old cassette tapes. I remember I still listened to them after he & my mom divorced after he returned.

But it was really helpful and important, and helped my 2-3 year old little self recognize him when he came home. I wish there'd been something like a daddy box for my sibs and me!