anxiety in kids

[emmasmommy]

i know kristin had mentioned that lily has been complaining of stomach aches and that her tummy problems could be due to stress/anxiety. well, i'm wondering, what could you do for a child with anxiety issues? i really don't want to medicate emma, but, i'm not sure where to go from here.

i realize that i'm not a good example (ulcer, constantly worrying, etc...), but i seriously am so worried for her. she has so many nervous habits, she bites her nails, she chews on her sleeves, she's ALWAYS worrying about what will happen next or what will happen if something doesn't go a certain way...things that a 'normal' 6 year old shouldn't be worrying about. i know how horrible it is to have this feeling and i hate to think that she's going through that at 6 years old.

what are some things that you guys have done/do for your anxiety ridden littles?

[jessica31876]

take her to a counseler? Or maybe just talk about what she is worried about and reassure her? I honestly did not have that problem with any of my kids really but anytime they were stressed or worried I could tell and I'd talk to them about what was worrying them.

[emmasmommy]

well, her school doesn't have a counselor....i don't know of any child counselors around here either (i'm sure i could look and find some if it came to that). she just worries about EVERYTHING. she's such a people pleaser and a rule follower. no one believes me that she's 6 because of the way she carries herself. i try to tell her that she shouldn't worry about the stuff and just be a kid, but that's like telling me not to worry LOL

[Misty Cato]

Hugs, my son is high anxiety and I'm amazed at the things that get him tied up in knots. I feel like his mind is a crazy minefield of 'what-ifs'. This book (http://www.amazon.com/Freeing-Your-Child-Anxiety-ebook/dp/B000S1LSCK/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&qid=1329961433&sr=8-9) really helped me with some tools, strategies and developing a kind of 'language' I can use with him to help him face the things that make him anxious. We have a referal to a counselor, but haven't pursued that route yet. I'd be interested in others experiences.

[emmasmommy]

thanks for the req, misty!! i'm going to pick it up!

[Misty Cato]

well, her school doesn't have a counselor....i don't know of any child counselors around here either (i'm sure i could look and find some if it came to that). she just worries about EVERYTHING. she's such a people pleaser and a rule follower. no one believes me that she's 6 because of the way she carries herself. i try to tell her that she shouldn't worry about the stuff and just be a kid, but that's like telling me not to worry LOL

Start with your family doctor who should be able to do an initial assessment and refer you to a counsellor/psychologies if it seems to be the best path.

One thing I've learned, kids with generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) are typically high-achieving, leaders who exude confidence.

[emmasmommy]

One thing I've learned, kids with generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) are typically high-achieving, leaders who exude confidence.

that is her. to a tee.

[lovely1m]

My brother was like that as a kid, too. Super worried about everything. Always the what ifs. Always chewing on stuff. And the whole leader with confidence thing, that's him, too. He also has night terrors, I know either E or M has them, can't remember which. I wonder if that's all related to. My mom took him a counselor for a while, but I think its just something he eventually learned to deal with for the most part.

[xboxmom]

Laura my Emma (11) has anxiety really bad. Her teacher mentioned it to me at parent teacher conferences last Oct. So we talked to the school councilor and she along with 4 other girls ranging from 3rd grade and up to 6th are all in a group counciling session there at school. She loves it and has improved dramatically!

My Emma says to tell her, "When she has anxiety she needs to stop close her eyes, sit somewhere comfortable and focus on your breathing and think only of your breathing. Or go on a "walk about" and do "I see, I hear," like I see a puffy cloud in the sky, I hear a bird in the trees. This gets your mind focused on something else rather than what you are worried about." She always says, "If you are having a test and are scared that you should repeat positive thoughts to yourself, like " I know this stuff, I am smart, and everything is going to be just fine."

[emmasmommy]

that totally made me smile, kim. thank you. i'll definitely pass that on to her.

[Jennilyn]

I don't know if you've read my FB today Laura, but we're going through the same thing! Kaylee (6 also) missed school yesterday and a few hours today because her tummy hurts. She is exactly like Emma except she rips her nails off rather than chews them and if she's holding onto my hand while anxious, she starts to try to rip mine off! I dread making her go to school tomorrow knowing that she'll be feeling bad and will most definitely cry. She also hasn't been eating because her stomach hurts which makes it even worse. She'll be going to the school psychologist to see what he thinks we can do to help alleviate her anxiety. DH was anxious as a kid and still is...she's definitely her daddy's baby!

[mariewilcox]

Cheyanne had anxiety issues when she was young and this (http://www.amazon.com/What-When-You-Worry-Much/dp/1591473144/ref=sr_1_cc_1?s=aps&ie=UTF8&qid=1329967649&sr=1-1-catcorr) book was great. She still pulls it out to read when she needs reinforcement.

It's written for kids with examples they can relate to and has pages for them to write things on so it's interactive. Worked better than the counselor did.

[kristijoy]

I know for myself, when I feel anxious I need to be able to have quiet and peaceful time. I take a walk in nature, I hike, I read a spiritual book, I meditate, I do yoga, I spend time alone where it is quiet and uplifting.

I know that lots of little ones never get any peace and quiet where they can just be. I highly recommend to anyone that they explore these types of activites for themselves and for young ones. Does she have time to unwind that isn't sitting in front of a TV? Does she have a spiritually recharging connection with nature, God, or self?

Here's a great read. I highly recommend this book to anyone.

Calm and Compassionate Children (http://www.amazon.com/Calm-Compassionate-Children-Susan-Dermond/dp/1587612763/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1329968072&sr=8-1)
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41wEg1zfZTL._BO2,204,203,200_PIsitb-sticker-arrow-click,TopRight,35,-76_AA300_SH20_OU01_.jpg

[emmasmommy]

thanks for all the suggestions everyone. i hope we can implement some stuff so it gets better instead of worse.

[xboxmom]

that totally made me smile, kim. thank you. i'll definitely pass that on to her.

She asked me this morning if what she said helped. LOL I told her I had not checked the board yet today. Also I have a Wav file that is a kids relaxation CD that is about 16 mins long. If you wanna try it out email me and I can see if it send through and actually work. xboxmom @ yahoo dot com

[julifish]

My oldest gets anxiety when we are in large crowds and then it got unbearable when she went to middle school. I used my employee assistance program at work to get her 5 free visits to a counselor that specialized in kids. If you or D don't have that maybe your parents do? A lot of companies extend benefits to friends and family of the employee.

The counselor talked her more about calming herself down - slow counting with exhaling and preparing herself for situations where she might feel anxious. Who could she talk to, what can she do to calm herself down, what are signs that she's feeling anxious. After the 5 visits we didn't need any more. She had the tools she needed to move on. I expect that at some point the anxiety will come again but at least I have a starting point to help her.

My youngest went through a total worry period last year where she would obess about us not having money or about the world ending in 2012 (that's classmates that told her this). She would spend weekends crying with us holding her she was so scared. We finally figured out it was tied to her ADD meds and once we took her off she did much better. I used the same counting techniques and making a plan techinques that the counselor taught me in the transition and it worked pretty well.

I'm going to check out some of these reads. You just never know when something like this might come up with your kids. At least she's coming to you about it versus trying to hide it from you. That's a good sign.

[lauren grier]

ce was dx'd with generalized anxiety & ptsd (which really is an anxiety disorder) a couple years ago. The main thing i can tell you is finding a relaxation routine that works for your kid specifically. Ce's been taught a ton of different methods.. From simple deep breathing routines, to tensing and relaxing different muscle groups, to pretending you're making lemonade (squeeze the lemon, pour it into a cup.. etc etc each step done really slowly and deliberately). Ce also does yoga - which he loves and again really helps him focus and do deep breathing etc. The trick is to teach them these coping mechanisms while they are calm.. doing it repeatedly so that when they are having a crisis or high anxiety they know what to do to relax themselves. HTH.. and this is an issue we've been dealing with for a long time now so if you need any advice or support you can always bug me :]

[scrapperjade]

My BFF's boy is on the autism spectrum, and he is a worrier, he will make himself SICK with worry & anxiety. She gives a regimen of all the B vitamins, which are known to help that. She says it takes awhile to take effect, but it's very helpful!

[LJSDesigns]

My DS hates changes, so whenever something new is on the horizon, we struggle. (His freshman year of college was pure he!!) He also has trouble with being happy; he will focus on the negative each and every time. We've talked about an anti depressant with our family Dr. but he doesn't want to take meds. He did agree to go to a counselor and it really helped a lot. He still gets stressed when things change, but we talk through it now.