So fruststrated with new neighbors

[3BluEyedBabi]

So we have these new neighbors. They actually moved in right after Christmas. They don't really speak English. I don't speak anything else. They keep leaving food scraps out for our cats and I have told them 4 times now to stop, they will make them sick. So today, she puts out this dish of chicken bones...like a lot them. I only knew because I had my windows open and I heard one of the cats crunching on something so I ran right outside to make sure he was ok. Come to find this dish filled with chicken bones and clumps of fat. Well, I lost it. I knocked on her door and told her she needs to stop feeding them before she kills them. She says "sorry" and shrugs her shoulders and goes back inside, but didn't take the dish with her! So I picked it up and put it in my garage to throw away (and show my husband later). I was furious. Meanwhile, the cat threw up the bones he was trying to eat. I've had it with this lady. I am so angry. Like seriously, just why? This was this afternoon and I am still just fuming. And really need to just vent.

So she leaves her house a few minutes later and comes back and puts a little flower on my porch with a note saying she likes cats, she is sorry she made me mad, and lets be friends. Really? Like how about you stop leaving bones outside for my cats! Am I overreacting or would you be angry if someone fed your cat CHICKEN BONES!??

[Cheryl Ashcraft]

I'm so sorry! It sounds like she was trying to show her love of cats, and with the language barrier, she just didn't understand.

Not everyone knows they can't feed cooked chicken bones to a cat. The bones become super brittle and can cause internal bleeding. Of course, there is the choking factor.

Maybe you can determine what language she speaks, and write your own note in her language so she understands the dangers of the chicken bones. Also, many good friendships are started by a misunderstanding . . . or at least that's been my experience.

Sending you ((HUGS)). This is not an easy situation!

[nietis]

It is most likely that she comes from a country where cats eat everything... but that does not mean she can just feed other people's pets that way. SO sorry that you are fuming and that she does not listen to your request :( I hope your cats are okay.

[Robin Carlton]

Oh my gosh! This would make me so angry too. It does sound like she just likes cats and is trying to make friends with them and you, but my god, it's overstepping for sure! It is a shame you can't tell what language she's speaking because it might be nice to use google translate to write her back, but I'm sure right now you just want to smack her lol :D

Keep us updated! I hope she stops from now on!

[bcgal00]

Definitely crossing the boundary of good neighboring. I would never feed someone's pet without their permission. It sounds like she is trying to be friendly but that is crossing the line. I hope you figure out a way to communicate with her.

[aussiegirl]

Oh no! We have had our fair share of NOT good neighbors over here, so I totally understand!

Maybe buy her a small bag of cat food that your cats will eat, a small bowl and a measuring scoop or something (do cats eat treats?) that she can use to help feed them. It sounds like she wasn't doing it out of spite or to hurt your cats, but just out of a misunderstanding. Maybe make a list of things she can feed the cats or go over and help show her how/what/how much to feed them, teaching her what is acceptable to you.

Good luck! Praying it all works out for you!

[lovely1m]

Do you have outside cats? I am sorry for assuming an American assumption (I have no clue where you live), but cats are generally not outdoor pets here unless you live on a farm and they are barn cats. Then they usually do eat anything. I agree with Cheryl. It seems like she's really trying to be nice and friendly but not understanding where you are that's different than what she thinks it should be. I can understand how frustrating neighbors can be for sure, but I think in this case, it's fixable.

[YepBrook]

Do you have outside cats? I am sorry for assuming an American assumption (I have no clue where you live), but cats are generally not outdoor pets here unless you live on a farm and they are barn cats. Then they usually do eat anything. I agree with Cheryl. It seems like she's really trying to be nice and friendly but not understanding where you are that's different than what she thinks it should be. I can understand how frustrating neighbors can be for sure, but I think in this case, it's fixable.

This was my thought and although I totally understand why people let their cats roam, it is an inherent risk of having outdoor cats especially in less remote areas like a neighborhood. Not only will people feed them but they may eat poisoned rodents or get into poison or traps people leave out for pests, etc. The lady might actually KNOW the bones are dangerous to your cat. Some people don't like loose cats around. From my experience, your cat may be using the neighbor's garden as their toilet. So courtesy goes both ways. I have a close friend who lives next door who at one point had 3 outdoor cats... one friendly one I'd feed treats to with my kids who can't have cats bc we are allergic. We had many conversations (she was a bit upset that the cat seemed to love us more and more) and I mentioned the cat poop smell in my front landscaping... the least she can do is let me be friends with the cat. LOL Maybe if your neighbor is compelled to feed your cat and isn't stopping (many people love to love on pets who come by their house- especially friendly ones) you can get her a little bag of treats and tell her she can give them a few of them when they visit. Lead by example of what to feed? Look up the translation in her language and write it on the bag in sharpie?

[jaye]

I can imagine your frustration, concern and anger. Is it possible to keep your cats contained in your yard? I understand you are upset that your neighbour isn't respecting your wishes about feeding your cats, but the best solution to me would be to keep them on your property then you don't have to worry about their safety. If she is ok with them being in her yard, purchase some treats that she can give them.

[bestcee]

I understand your frustration and anger. Maybe, since there's a language barrier, she didn't realize they are your cats and thought they were neighborhood cats? We have feral cats that run around and don't belong to anyone, but they consistently go to certain peoples homes for food.

We also have city rules about outdoor cats, and unfortunately, some people have escalated problems with neighbors over their outdoor cats. A few people have lost their cats because neighbors got mad and caught the cats and took them to the humane society. One neighbor was particularly mad because the cat next door used his garden as a bathroom, so he *allegedly* caught the cat on his property and dropped it off in a field miles from home. Neither neighbor was in the right.

In some countries, outdoor cats are seen as a menace, so it's possible the neighbor doesn't think it's a pet.