This is a hard one in our house. I'm a vegetarian and DH is a meat eater, so there are usually 2 meals to begin with. (NOT both cooked by me.) I make some things, DH makes some things, and we combine everything into meals everyone will eat. My 4 year old is a picky meat-loving kid who still doesn't eat combination foods well, and my 2 year old doesn't like most meat.
So for example, tonight we had pork chops. I made sure to serve pasta as a side so that DS2 and I could eat pasta and still have a real meal. If we're having baked ziti, I know to save some plain pasta for DS1. So I would say I don't make separate meals (except for me, LOL) but I make sure there's something for everyone in the main meal and will allow variations that aren't much extra work. The kids get some of everything on their plate even if I know they don't like it. My 4-year old is required to take a bite of everything on his plate, and we'll start the same with my 2 year old when he gets a bit older. If DS decides he won't eat something, he knows he can have a peanut butter sandwich instead.
My tip for the occasional battle when they don't want to take the required bite: don't turn it into a battle. I take the food away and put that item into the fridge with no argument, just a reminder. When it's time for snack I take it out again, and they have to take the bite first. Usually DS takes his bite with no problem then because he's had some time to cool down.
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Originally Posted by makabe
You all seem like the perfect group to ask this question of: How did you get your kids to understand that they eat what you give them? Our son was not introduced to foods on the normal timeline. When we adopted him (from Korea) at 13 mo. old, he was still only getting formula for the most part. As a result, he hates the texture (or so it would seem) of almost everything.
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Have you tried working with a speech or occupational therapist on this? If not, it might be worth a try. Someone who works on sensory issues would also be great, though they're harder to find. I think when there are real issues behind the aversion, just making it a rule or trying to force it isn't enough. You may need to teach him to accept textures gradually, starting with the ones he's comfortable with and varying things a little at a time.