I'm going to respond even though I'm widowed.
For 20 years I did most of the housework and DH did everything else, BUT he was deployed a lot and I never minded doing it. When he was home he still worked on base during the day, so I still did the majority of the housework.
Once DS was old enough he took care of trash/yard work/and maintenance issues. DS also knew how to run a vacuum, broom, mop, washing machine and dryer by age 10 and loved to cook. I did take care of bills and stuff because when he was deployed or away on special assignment for a week or two it needed to be done. When he was home he was a HUGE help with DS in the child rearing days (DS was 15 when DH was killed). I didn't have DD until DS was 13 so it was one child at a time. DS learned from his father and was a huge help with DD when DH passed (she was only 2-1/2).
Now that it's just DD (almost 11) and I, she does a lot. She does laundry, vacuums, dishes, sweeps, mops, bathroom duty, dusts, mows lawn, trash duty, etc. We pretty much split everything up - if she mows, I vacuum. If she does the laundry one day then I do dishes that day, etc. She helps me cook but I handle the money - LOL. We both pick up after ourselves daily - no clutter piling up because it drives us both batty.
I agree with the statement that every family has what works for them, but if one person feels bitter or overburdened then it might be time for a family meeting - LOL.
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