Please say something..

[knlchevys]

Okay I need someone to say something to help me out here. Here's the scenerio..

*8 yr old has some OCD. He is very cautious and scared boy. Anyways, he decided to play baseball this year. We let him but the league is a little bit better then the usual league here this year. So his team is practicing twice a week. His coaches have been amazing and knew from the get go that he hasn't played.

We practice at home. But tonight I think his coaches are getting tired of it. Poor guy is overthinking EVERYTHING. You can see he is going through the steps in his mind whenever he tries to do something. He stresses and messes up and the coaches tell him AGAIN how to do it. He is having fun but he is almost in tears because "everyone keeps telling me how to do EVERYTHING."

As a mom, it is the hardest thing to sit on the sidelines and watch this. So please, any words of advice or any words at all. I'm to the point of tears.

[KateD]

((hugs))

I'm not sure I have any great advice. I think you're on the right track with practicing at home. At some point, the reactions should become more natural to him and he should stop having to think about everything so much.

If he knows what to do and is just getting stressed out, maybe you could talk with his coaches and let them know that. If they stop giving him so much direction maybe he'll relax and start to do what he knows he should.

It's really hard to be a parent sometimes.

[*Celeste*]

I don't have any advice. Have you spoke to a doctor about it? Are there any things that help him calm down? Is he enjoying it? If he's enjoying it then I think you just have to let him play and maybe have a conversation with the coaches about letting him be a bit. I bet he'll figure it out if they step back a bit. Hugs! It must be so hard to watch.

[rach3975]

Originally Posted by KateD

((hugs)) If he knows what to do and is just getting stressed out, maybe you could talk with his coaches and let them know that. If they stop giving him so much direction maybe he'll relax and start to do what he knows he should.

I agree with Kate. I think I'd let the coaches know that he knows what to do intellectually, and repeating it so many times is making it harder for him to play without overthinking it. ((Hugs)) It's great that your son is giving something new a try-I wish there were a way for him to do it without the stress of trying to keep up with kids who are more experienced. One of my kids has a motor planning disorder, and I know we're going to go through the same thing if he wants to join a team.

[nun69]

I had the exact same thing happen with Ben and baseball....the 1st year wasn't so bad, but last year was a disaster..if he missed the ball he would hang his head down and not talk to anybody or even pay attention.....if he struck out, he would have a silent meltdown and then wouldn't go out in the filed and play his position....etc etc....so I have come to the conclusion for hi ssake and ours, we will wait until he is READY to WANT to play and understand that you don't always do everything right and you can't ALWAYS be the best player and it is all about giving 100% of effort and enjoying it....so if you talk with the coaches and things don't seem to work out, I am one to let him just quit....I know that might not be the right answer, but after sticking out 2 years of baseball with Ben {he is 10 now}, I wish I would have let him quit sooner than later...would have been less stress on all of us...good luck~
I also came to tthe conclusion that not every sport is suitable for every kid~

[knlchevys]

Thanks girls!! He does still want to play so we are enjoying him. I have talked with his doctor but his OCD isn't inhibiting his daily life so he feels like until it does, we should keep doing what we are doing with him. The coaches know everything about him and how he is. The one has a son just like him. But they all have older brothers so they play. We are going to keep chuggin along until he has a melt down or two. We feel like we are just going to encourage him in anything he wants. He tried flag football. LUCKILY, hated it!! He is quite good as basketball and hope he continues with that. Anyways, thanks again for the hugs!! This mom needs it!!

[kkgordon02]

We have a similar situation here. Sports have gotten so competitive! My son is six and has practices and two games a week. Games start next week, and even though we can't get our money back I think i'm pulling him. I just don't think extracurricular things like sports should be stressful in first grade! Some kids have been taking baseball classes all year, so my son is behind? Crazy!

[MommaTrish]

One of my best friends growing up had a brother with really bad OCD, and he played softball. He wanted to play, but it wasn't pretty or easy. I remember going with them to practices and his coaches were not understanding at all. It wasn't until he'd been playing a year or two that he seemed to really enjoy it during practices and games, but even still he had to do everything an exact certain way.
I say if he's wanting to do it, let him. Just keep practicing at home. I can't tell you anything to make the whole process easier, since none of my kids have it, but I'll wish you lots of luck.

[kristijoy]

I totally agree with practicing at home! He needs to make the motions a habit that is felt in the body (like playing a musical instrument) and not with the mind. Some people just have a knack for body things like that and get it right off. Other (like your son) will need to just keep doing it over and over to get into flow! It will just take some time! So if he is willing to stick to it... I would keep helping him out!

[deepounds]

Sounds to me like you're doing all the right things . . . particularly practicing at home so it will eventually become more of a second nature to him & he won't have to think so hard about each step of the process.

It IS unfortunate that sports have gotten so competitive . . . it's difficult to find a team, regardless of how young the kids are, that isn't more focused on winning than on honing the kids' skills and teaching them teamwork.

Will be thinking of you & sending lot of positive vibes your way!!