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Old 05-14-2018, 01:36 PM
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Default I am so heartbroken

Remember how I told you all last week that we adopted a pure-bred bengal cat from our friend who needed to rehome her due to her not adjusting to her home?

Since then I joined a handful of Bengal FB Groups and saw that the bengals in those groups were not like our bengal cat. They were active. All ours did was snuggle with us and sleep. She barely ate any of her food. When I called our friend, she told us she was still adjusting. She had a vet appointment last Wednesday, but it needed to be cancelled due to my husband needing out-patient surgery. Our friend was supposed to rescheduled on Friday, but that fell through as well. I became very worried that something was wrong with the cat and expressed my concerns with my husband who dismissed them at first. But by Friday he said I need to pressure our friend to get her an appointment on Monday because we needed to make sure she was okay. We were going to change ownership, microchip and medical records at this appointment, so while she was "our" cat, she still belonged to our friend through microchip and at the vet. I was so worried about our cat that Friday evening I ended up posting in the Bengal FB Group and they all said "take her the vet asap". We listened and took her to the animal hospital here in town. Our friend, who gave us the cat, thought we were just being paranoid and came to the vet to "talk us off the cliff of owning this cat" When she saw her cat, she knew something was wrong. We were at the vet for many long hours and all the news the vet came back was bad news after bad news. As a result, we sent off a bunch of tests and hopefully will find out, for sure, next Monday what is wrong with our cat. However the vet believes our cat is dying of FIP (Feline Infectious Peritonitis), which is fatal and there's no cure. She didn't think our cat would live through the weekend, and will be checking in on us later today to see if she needs more IV fluids.

It's been horrible. When we got home Saturday afternoon, we just told the kids that she had a 104 fever and was sick. We told them that we didn't know what was wrong with her (which we don't for sure), and will know more later next week. Then we told them they need to spend as much time possible with her, to encourage her fight through whatever is ailing her small body (if it's an infection).

Sunday morning my son came downstairs and saw the kitty on the sofa and sobbed as he hovered over her. He kept asking what was wrong with his best friend and if she's going to die. He would not let her out of his sight for most of the day and was very moody, often breaking out in tears when he pet her--which was a couple of times an hour. I finally got him distracted and gave her to a kid, to sleep on their bed in their room. We noticed around lunchtime that she no longer has the energy to walk up the stairs to the bedrooms or her litter. As a result she had two potty accidents yesterday evening and overnight--both in our daughter's beds (thank goodness for really good mattress covers!)

It's going to be a long week waiting and worrying about the cat. Last night I took the girls out to Walmart (just to get them away from their brother) and told them that while we don't know what's wrong with the cat, it's a real possibility that she will die. That news did not go over well. She is their first cat, ever! They had been begging for a cat for years, but due to allergies we couldn't get one until I discovered there were hypoallergenic cats that are easier on allergies. My oldest refused to leave the car, eat her ice cream that I bought her and refused to speak to me; she was so angry. She came home, locked herself in her room and sobbed. My middle, she just cried and cried, and cried in the car, at Walmart, even once we got home. It was so hard because she's the same one who cried for two days (last Sunday and Monday) because she wanted a cat her whole life and couldn't believe we finally got one!! Last night my middle declared she wasn't going to school--of course, both girls are in school today. But it's been an emotional week and weekend for sure. I didn't even get on my computer until just now to see what new releases that were released on Friday! (Good products, designers!!!)

This cat has only been in our lives for a week, but she's made such an impact on our lives. The kids have been so happy having a pet that loves them, loves to snuggle and doesn't bit/snip if you bugged her. They have all been going to bed without fighting me that they can stay up another hour all because they want to snuggle with the kitten and love on her. In just a week's time, she's been an angel, heaven-sent and I'm really heartbroken to think she's dying and there's a great possibility that she will no longer be in our lives after next week. I feel so guilty bringing a sick cat in to the family, but with bringing her in to my family, I was able to see signs that she was sick, signs that might not have been seen at my friend's house, had she kept the cat. I brought this heartache to our family and I feel terrible. I feel so guilty; I brought this hurt and pain on our family. Right now, the previous owners and our family are "co-owning" the kitten. We get to keep her at the house because we are home more than her family, but they are involved in her medical care, including if the decision comes down to putting her down. They have been over twice and yesterday they came over for quite some time to spend time with the kitten. Before they left our house, her son said to me that they want her cremated and they want to give us half of her ashes so we always have a piece of her with us. I told the mother, I didn't want ashes and if they want her cremated, they can keep all of her since they had her longer in their hearts than our family. Her response was "you know we are connected for life now, right?" We are sharing such an emotional time with another family over such a precious and beautiful kitten!!

This photo was taken last night before I went to bed. You can see in her eyes that she's sick. Her eyes are glassy and not open all the way.
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Old 05-14-2018, 02:05 PM
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I am so very sorry, Wendy That is absolutely heart breaking. I will be praying for your family <3
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Old 05-14-2018, 02:27 PM
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Oh Wendy...I'm all teary-eyed just reading this. I'm so, so sorry. Please try not to be so hard on yourself. I know that's easier said than done but you had no way to know that she was sick before you brought her home. This isn't your fault. Hang in there, mama. Sending hugs your way.
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Old 05-14-2018, 02:47 PM
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Oh Wendy! This breaks my heart! I'm so sorry you guys are going through this.
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Old 05-14-2018, 02:48 PM
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I'm so sorry. That's heartbreaking.
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Old 05-14-2018, 03:51 PM
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Big hugs - I'm so sorry.
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Old 05-14-2018, 03:56 PM
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Oh Wendy..... I am so so very sorry. I am lifting your family and your kitty up in prayers! <3
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Old 05-14-2018, 04:03 PM
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so so sorry Wendy. Sending prayers to your family <3
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Old 05-14-2018, 04:32 PM
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I'm so sorry. At least she's known so much love from your family. Maybe she wound up with you for a reason.
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Old 05-14-2018, 04:34 PM
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So very sorry to hear this your family is in my prayers.
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Old 05-14-2018, 04:39 PM
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Oh Wendy! I'm so sorry! This is heartbreaking! I'm all teary eyed reading this. Big hugs to you and your family! Will be keeping you all and your kitty in my prayers!
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Old 05-14-2018, 04:51 PM
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So so so sorry Wendy. It's hard just to read how this is affecting you and your family, I can't imagine what you're going through. Don't feel guilty. You're doing the best you can for your kids and this kitty. Lots of love and hugs.
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Old 05-14-2018, 05:25 PM
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so sorry your family is going through this....
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Old 05-14-2018, 06:06 PM
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I'm so sorry too. She's such a sweet kitty - I was showing the other pics you posted of her to my boys who are both adore cats, and we're all so sad.
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Old 05-14-2018, 06:06 PM
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That is so very sad. I'm so sorry Wendy.
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Old 05-14-2018, 06:32 PM
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I'm so sorry! This isn't easy on anyone
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Old 05-14-2018, 06:40 PM
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I am so sorry. Losing a pet is terrible, but watching it die makes it so much harder. My heart a he's for you and your kids.
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Old 05-14-2018, 08:31 PM
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I'm so sorry, Wendy. You couldn't have known what would happen so please don't feel guilty. You & your family are loving her and taking care of her, and that's the best gift you can give any pet no matter how long you have him/her. You are making a difference in her life, and that counts for something.
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Old 05-14-2018, 08:33 PM
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OH Wendy I have such a lump in my throat and my heart hurts for you and the kids.
You didn't bring heartache into your family, you also brought true, pure love, compassion and joy. Your kids are showing you how much they love and the empathy they hold for such a small creature. She has impacted your lives in an amazing way in a short period of time, she is with you for a reason ❤️

I will be keeping all of you in my thoughts as you wander down this difficult and emotional path. Sending love and hugs your way.
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Old 05-14-2018, 09:37 PM
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I'm so sorry about the kitten! Maybe the medicine will work, but maybe it is better to just put her down so she isn't in pain and suffering (I know it's hard, but it's better in the long run, than seeing them get worse and worse). Don't feel you did this. You had no way of knowing that she was sick. I know if you had known she was sick beforehand, you would have not brought her into your family. You will all get through this, and you will look back on your week of memories with fondness. This has taught you that you CAN have a cat- just give yourself time to grieve before rushing into another one! Also, you are right, you caught her illness and were able to try to get her treatments. If she hadn't come to you, she could have suffered in silence for longer!

Prayers for you and your family! Losing a pet is hard, but you will get through this!
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Old 05-14-2018, 09:58 PM
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So sorry to hear about your cat. I hope the medicines will help her...
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Old 05-14-2018, 10:05 PM
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I'm so sorry that you and your kids are having such a tough experience for their first foray into pet ownership. Hugs for all of you!
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Old 05-14-2018, 11:17 PM
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oh no I'm so sorry I hope the kids aren't too upset about it. Poor kitty
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Old 05-15-2018, 12:37 AM
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Oh Wendy... I am so so sorry about your cat
You and your family will be in my thoughts. HUGS.
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Old 05-15-2018, 02:31 AM
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So sorry to read this Wendy.
FIP is so aweful.
You and your family are in my thoughts.
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Old 05-15-2018, 02:59 AM
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Wendy I am so so sorry. I'm bawling right along with the kiddo. My hewrt aches for your family right now. Y'all are in my prayers
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Old 05-15-2018, 03:07 AM
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This is so sad. My sons had a cat with their dad.after a half year it got fip.nothing the could do
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Old 05-15-2018, 06:51 AM
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This is so sad :c Poor kitty she really does look sick :c I will be praying for your family and your son. It must be so hard on him :c Praying medicine would help her.


This just reminded me when my pet passed away. :c Sorry, I know this is about your cat but now my thoughts are just so into it. :C She was a very active Maltese and would always wake us up early in the morning and brought many joys to my life as a teenager. We adopted her in late 2004, we thought she was just a black bag left in the park. It was a windy day and there was no one there. She was abandoned there. I still remember that day, it is so vivid. She was the most adorable puppy ever :c Then one day, mom decided to gave her away. I didn't want it to happen but my other puppy a Labrador was hurting her. We gave her away in 2007, but the adopters returned her back a year later. I was so happy, but my happiness only lasted a few couple of days. In August 1st, 2008, she woke up but never got up her bed. My brother and I were so worried, my parents wouldn't hear us. Three days passed by when my she started throwing up, potty issues and stopped eating. We took her to the vet, but he said it was too late, that she was just living her last days due to an infection. I remember we asked him why the virus was affecting her so fast, and he said that it probably had started a couple of months ago not just recently. It was 08/08/08 when my pet died in my brother's and my hands, we were laying on the floor with her, and we were petting her. The last thing she did was to lick our fingers as her energy went off :c

I've never seen a puppy like her again :c
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Old 05-15-2018, 08:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by imperio View Post
This is so sad :c Poor kitty she really does look sick :c I will be praying for your family and your son. It must be so hard on him :c Praying medicine would help her.


This just reminded me when my pet passed away. :c Sorry, I know this is about your cat but now my thoughts are just so into it. :C She was a very active Maltese and would always wake us up early in the morning and brought many joys to my life as a teenager. We adopted her in late 2004, we thought she was just a black bag left in the park. It was a windy day and there was no one there. She was abandoned there. I still remember that day, it is so vivid. She was the most adorable puppy ever :c Then one day, mom decided to gave her away. I didn't want it to happen but my other puppy a Labrador was hurting her. We gave her away in 2007, but the adopters returned her back a year later. I was so happy, but my happiness only lasted a few couple of days. In August 1st, 2008, she woke up but never got up her bed. My brother and I were so worried, my parents wouldn't hear us. Three days passed by when my she started throwing up, potty issues and stopped eating. We took her to the vet, but he said it was too late, that she was just living her last days due to an infection. I remember we asked him why the virus was affecting her so fast, and he said that it probably had started a couple of months ago not just recently. It was 08/08/08 when my pet died in my brother's and my hands, we were laying on the floor with her, and we were petting her. The last thing she did was to lick our fingers as her energy went off :c

I've never seen a puppy like her again :c
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Old 05-15-2018, 12:58 PM
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I'm so sorry this is happening to you guys and the poor kitty. So incredibly sad.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:28 PM
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I'm so sorry Wendy!
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:43 PM
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I am so sorry about your kitten Wendy and I will pray that the medicine helps. Do not feel guilty about bringing the kitten into your lives. She needed you and the love you can provide to help her heal or to have made her short time here a beautiful experience. Lots of hugs to you, the family and the kitten.
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Old 05-15-2018, 03:06 PM
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I am so so sorry Wendy.. this is breaking my heart..
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Old 05-16-2018, 01:05 PM
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I am so sorry this is happening a week into having the kitty.
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Old 05-16-2018, 01:37 PM
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So so sorry! I love cats and was so thrilled to see your kitty pictures. I was looking forward to watching the kitty grow I know your family is going thru this difficult time and I will be thinking of you. I had a kitty who had suspected FIP and it was so heart wrenching!
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Old 05-16-2018, 02:05 PM
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Wendy, my heart is breaking for you and your family. I am so sorry about your fur baby. You and your family are in my thoughts.
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Old 05-16-2018, 06:00 PM
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Oh Wendy, I'm crying, I'm just so sorry for you and your family and this lovely kitten... I miss words, it remind me losing our dog few monthes ago (nothing to do with your lovely kitten, he was hit by a car at 5 years old but it's so difficult and hard and kids still asking when he is going to come back...) Awful time.
I was so happy for all of you, reading your post is terrible!
You shouldn't feel guilty, you can't guess she was ill and at least maybe it was her destiny to be with you all for this terrible time.
I send you all my prayers and lot's of love. I know how it is difficult but since she was so much wait in your family, it's heart breaking!
I wish you lots of courage too!
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Old 05-17-2018, 11:31 AM
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Poor kitty and your poor family. I am so sorry to hear that.
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Old 05-18-2018, 01:02 AM
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This was supposed to be her first of many play pages that I started scrapping last Tuesday. I was distracted with her, my husband that I didn't get back to it until Saturday after we went to the vet. By that time, I didn't want to scrap a life layout that I knew this was going to be both her life/death layout. I finished it today, after we said our final goodbye to our precious kitten. It was the hardest thing to see, my children suffering.



I tried to post the journaling, but the gallery won't let me post it. So here it is if you want to read it:
How do I tell this story, the life of Ahsoka and how she came to us without ending in tears? A friend of the family had asked if anyone local wanted a pure-bred Bengal kitten that wasn’t adjusting well to her home. Mama knew that Bengal cats were hypoallergenic and asked this friend if she would consider our family for rehoming. On May 13, we went and visited this beautiful and precious kitten. It was love at first sight. Daddy told our friend that we wanted to take her home that day, and we did! As soon as we came home, the kids quickly decided on a name for our new kitty, which was just a trialun to make sure Madalyn didn’t have any allergic reactions. They decided on a name as Ahsoka fell asleep on Mama and Daddy’s bed for the night. The following days, Mama joined a few Bengal Facebook Groups and realized our kitten was nothing like the kittens in that group. She expressed her concerns, but they were dismissed. By Friday of that week, Daddy agreed that something was wrong with our kitten. She was hardly drinking or eating and spent most of her days sleeping. We took her to the animal hospital, where we were met with our friend. We never imagined the news we would get from the vet. She thought she had feline infectious peritonitis (fip) which is fatal. We did the necessary tests and waited for the results. But in the meantime we gave her medicine and things that might make her feel better. After a few days, the vet called with the devastating news, confirming fip. It was decided that should the test results be positive, we would do the humane thing and put Ahsoka down. On Thursday, May 17, less than two weeks, our family met with the previous family at the vet and said our good byes to the best cat our family could ever have been blessed. Ahsoka was cremated and the ashes were given to the previous owners, and our family received ornamental paw prints for each of the children to honor their first kitten. Ahsoka might have only been part of the family for a short time frame, but she taught us so much about ourselves and loving an animal so quickly and completely
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Old 05-18-2018, 09:28 AM
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So heartbroken for your family. Sending lots of love and hugs.
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Old 05-18-2018, 06:43 PM
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I'm so sorry, Wendy. This isn't the way I was hoping the story would end. My heart goes out to you.
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Old 05-19-2018, 06:42 PM
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I just second Tammy, I was hoping for another end, maybe miraculous...
I'm so sorry for your loss and wish you all the courage you need.
I feel very sad for both of you and send you lot's of prayers and love to all of you!
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Old 05-21-2018, 02:44 PM
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Its been a few days. On Friday, one of our friends offered to take my youngest to the bounce park for two hours. She ended up keeping him from 10 until 5pm. When she brought him home, he searched the house and cried when he couldn't find his kitty. It was sad. But he's getting over it and not crying nearly as much.

The oldest went to school on Friday. Refused to talk to me. Sometime around Saturday afternoon she started talking to me and by Sunday she talked to me about the cat. She's really sad. Trying to hold it all in and "suck it up", but I know she's hurting.

The middle, she stayed home on Friday because she was in my bed until 2am crying. I finally got her calmed down and she fell asleep around 3:30. When she woke up to go to school, she kept breaking down and sobbing. We decided it best to keep her home so she wasn't a distraction to the other students and they didn't have to deal with her. Instead she helped with the yard sale and then after the yard sale, she helped me destroy all of Ahsoka's toys, cat litters and scratching post. She sobbed while we broke it down, but I think it was good for her. Saturday she cried a little. But by Sunday she was able to talk with little tears.

I think slowly we are all starting to get over the loss of the kitten. Now we clean and sterilize the house of the virus so if another kitten comes in to the home, they won't be exposed to it. After a month or so, we can think about getting a new kitten. But I'm not sure if we will do that or wait until we find out what's going on for next May (my husband will have to re-enlist and will probably come down on orders to move). Either way, it'll be a hot minute before we get a new kitty in the house, but we will eventually. Ahsoka showed us how much we could love a kitten and it's something we want to do again!

Thank you all for the prayers and the support. It's been an emotional week and weekend. But I told my girls this week is the LAST week of school and it's going to be a good week. We'll try to stay positive this week, while keeping her memory alive in our hearts!
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Old 05-21-2018, 02:46 PM
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carrie1977 carrie1977 is offline
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My heart breaks for ya'll.
Hopefully you will find the perfect kitten to add to your family when the time is right.
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