too "old" for long hair?

[Amy Carey]

This just floors me and at first I thought it was just my mom. She is forever telling me my hair is too long for my age (I'll be 40 this year) and you can see how long my hair is in my avatar. Is it REALLY too long? Is this something any of you have ever heard before? I just saw something else about it while surfing the net (XO Jane blog) and I was just floored. I mean does longer hair past a certain age make you look OLDER? my husband loves my hair and I've never in my life had short hair. I think i'd look horrible!! Your opinions?

[BrattyMeg]

I have long hair too and am 35..sooooooo

I need a haircut though...i have a full face so I can't pull short hair off well. Those darn cheeks have plagued me forever

[ChristyHC]

I'm 35 and have had long hair all my life too. I've heard people say that about age and long hair though and I don't get it at all. I love my long hair.

ETA: Just noticed that my avi picture is a bit old - this is the shortest I have ever had it. It is a lot longer now.

[KateD]

I'm 43 and my hair goes down to my butt I had about 8 inches "trimmed" off when I got back from deploying in 2004 and he wouldn't talk with me about my hair for days - he was that upset! I'll be 97 and still have hair this long

As long as you and your hubby like it, then who cares what anyone else thinks???

[Kara]

My hair has always been longer than shoulder length and honestly, I'd like to cut it just for a change - but DH prefers it long so that's pretty much how I've kept it.

[BrattyMeg]

btw i could care less if my dh likes it or not lol I mean of course I want to please him but I'd never not do something how I want it on my body b/c he was against it. Lord knows there's some things about him I can't stand but I'd never make him change it for me

I keep my hairstyle by what makes me feel/look good..he can get over it if it hated my haircut as far as I'm concerned

[kscwgirl]

My hair stays about shoulder length, sometimes shorter. DH prefers longer hair, but it's my head so I don't really care what he wants.

[BrattyMeg]

Originally Posted by kscwgirl

My hair stays about shoulder length, sometimes shorter. DH prefers longer hair, but it's my head so I don't really care what he wants.

I think we'd just like our DH's to have hair =)

[kscwgirl]

Originally Posted by FlirtatiousBrat

I think we'd just like our DH's to have hair =)

bwahahahaaaa I actually think Jeff would look funny w/ hair.. when he doesn't shave in a while it looks weird.

[Nettio]

Originally Posted by FlirtatiousBrat

btw i could care less if my dh likes it or not lol I mean of course I want to please him but I'd never not do something how I want it on my body b/c he was against it. Lord knows there's some things about him I can't stand but I'd never make him change it for me

I keep my hairstyle by what makes me feel/look good..he can get over it if it hated my haircut as far as I'm concerned

I always tell him that unless he's willing to style it for me, he doesn't get a say.

He doesn't really seem to care whether it's short or long though but I remember when I cut it short again while he was deployed, my hairstylist asked me if he would have a problem with it. Apparently it's was a real issue for some of her clients.

[Keely~B]

You know I think it can be aging but so can a lot of hair dos that are shorter. If you like it, who cares. I much prefer my hair short but I have crazy thick, unweilldy hair. I've heard all kinds of things said about what women over X age should or shouldn't do that make me go ??? I'm a "if you don't like it, look away" type :P

[Darcy Baldwin]

HAHAHAHA!

I cut mine off for the last time a few months ago. I hate it short - hate having to style it, hate not being able to pull it back without a ton of hairspray to hold everything back. Then I saw a picture of me with Connor as a baby and really missed my long hair from the pic and swore that it's coming back - I don't care how old I am. I'm approaching 50, and dang it, I'll have long hair again!

Probably not past my shoulders because it's super fine, but still better than what it is now!

[ColleenSwerb]

Originally Posted by FlirtatiousBrat

btw i could care less if my dh likes it or not lol I mean of course I want to please him but I'd never not do something how I want it on my body b/c he was against it. Lord knows there's some things about him I can't stand but I'd never make him change it for me

I keep my hairstyle by what makes me feel/look good..he can get over it if it hated my haircut as far as I'm concerned

Word. Jordan doesn't like it blonde or short, and I love it like that, LOL!
I HAVE heard the long hair/too old thing. I think it depends on the woman though.

[Julie Billingsley]

I'm 41, and until last year I had long (to the middle of my back) hair. I don't think there is an any age limit to long hair. Some women's hair will thin out significantly as they age and it ends up looking better when they get it cut short so it looks fuller. But that depends on your hair type, not some age limit. As for me, I cut mine because I was interested in a change, and my age had no factor in that.

[maryinaz]

I'm older than ALL of you and I'm currently growing my hair longer. It's just slightly below my shoulders now and I want it about 2 inches longer. When I was a teenager, it was down to my butt, so I know I can grow it long if I just have the patience.

I think it's a generation thing - my mom's had short hair since she was married and so do all her friends. Unless someone puts it up in a "bun" every day. My MIL used to do that - she would let her hair grow and have to put it up every day. But she was just lazy and didn't want to have to fix her hair or get it cut.

In my personal opinion, I'm not crazy about really long gray hair, but as long as I can color mine, that won't be a factor.

[LJSDesigns]

I've heard this before as well, but If you like your hair, then that is all that matters. Please yourself and the heck with anyone else. If I were you though, I would talk to my mother about it. Maybe if you discuss it with her, you won't have to hear about it any more.

[JulieB146]

Originally Posted by FlirtatiousBrat

btw i could care less if my dh likes it or not lol I mean of course I want to please him but I'd never not do something how I want it on my body b/c he was against it. Lord knows there's some things about him I can't stand but I'd never make him change it for me

I keep my hairstyle by what makes me feel/look good..he can get over it if it hated my haircut as far as I'm concerned

I'm with you on this one. Besides, my hubby lost his hair years ago, and I'd never, for example, ask him to shave off the last of it that he has if I really wanted him to go all-bald, KWIM? And if he wanted me to grow long hair, well, that's never going to happen, because a) I look terrible with long hair and b) my hair's too thin and c) I can't really grow it longer than my shoulders anymore anyway. It grows so slowly now!

That said, I don't think older women have to cut their hair if they don't want to. I've seen advertisements (remember those Cialis ads for male erm, flaccidness? can't remember what they call it) and in some of those ads, they showed this gorgeous older woman, with long, long, long white hair down to her butt, practically.

What I think is important is to *update* the cut and shape of your hair. It's easy to get lazy and wear a hairstyle you've worn since the 80s, or 90s, thinking your face is the same shape/youthful face you had back then. And even long hair has lots of options for styling cuts.

[lee69]

Do whatever you like! There's nothing wrong with long hair at any age.

[krystalhartley]

Originally Posted by FlirtatiousBrat

btw i could care less if my dh likes it or not lol I mean of course I want to please him but I'd never not do something how I want it on my body b/c he was against it. Lord knows there's some things about him I can't stand but I'd never make him change it for me

I keep my hairstyle by what makes me feel/look good..he can get over it if it hated my haircut as far as I'm concerned

THIS.
I absolutely do not understand the women who keep their hair long just because their husbands like it. Especially if it doesn't look good.

And I used to think long hair on older women was a terrible idea. Honestly, I think it depends on the woman...how it looks on her...how she styles it, etc.

FWIW, I'm 40 and my hair is a few inches below my bra strap in the back. It's layered up the wazoo tho.

[MamaBee]

Originally Posted by FlirtatiousBrat

I think we'd just like our DH's to have hair =)

bwhahahahahah! I've told my hubby that he would not look good as a bald man... and the man is starting to thin on top... *sigh*

My mom has told me to cut my hair this since I turned 25... She has had short hair her whole life... and made me have short hair from age 2 to about 14 when I was able to get it chin length for a year before I cut is super short in the back... through college it was back to chin length... and then when i was working, I was traveling so much, not home to get my hair cut and it was just way easier to whip it up into a ponytail to walk the mill floors. Now as a wife/mom... I guess i don't care... if I get my hair cut once a year, I call it a success... so it's long again. Hubby prefers my hair longer... but he also knows that it's my hair and I can do what I want... I would like to get my hair cut a lot shorter... but then I have to actually work on it in the morning and I just don't have the time.

[lauren grier]

i think the old lady cut is a bad idea and makes people look older ignore your mom.

[iScrap]

My hair is super dooper short, but it's because I like it and it makes me feel good. I think if you love it, it's flattering, to heck with what everyone else says

Look at long haired beauties (over 40, too) like Catherine Zeta-Jones, Courtney Cox, Sarah Jessica Parker, Sandra Bullock, and poor, sad Demi Moore (but she has awesome hair!). Now, if they could just stay out of the Botox...

[Leila]

I'm 37 and I love my long hair. I'm hearing a lot of the age/hair thing these days too, but I'm not changing things up at all.

I read this article a few months ago and loved it.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/24/fashion/24Mirror.html

Note: I am not calling any of us middle-aged...

[cardinalskate]

My grandma always tells my mom the same thing about her being too old for long hair. Maybe it's a generational thing, if it's coming from the senior citizens...

[tanyiadeskins]

Yep....no way am I giving up my hair unless I have to at any age!

[Amy Carey]

yea ya know, what's funny is my mom's hair is so very thin she has to wear a wig. DAILY. So um maybe she is jealous? LOL. Actually she has NEVER had long hair. I have very very thick hair and short just won't lay down or style...shortest ever was to my chin and that was an accident years ago that was pretty traumatic lol. I DO think I might try some layers to liven things up a bit. At least I don't still have the same pouf I did in high school (got rid of that about 5 years ago. tee hee!!)

[rach3975]

I definitely think it has more to do with a flattering style for you than an absolute of what style is right at what age. I'm 36 and my hair is a few inches below my shoulders. I don't consider that long, but maybe the anti-long-hair police would. I've wanted it longer for years, but it's fine and very curly and just doesn't get longer than that. I'd never go super short, and probably wouldn't go much above shoulder level--between my curls and face shape, it would look awful on me. What I do as I get older will depend on how my hair and face change.

[kelley]

Man, I really could care less what other people think of my hair, lol. I'm only 31, but if I'm 50 and I want long hair, I'm going to have it. If someone wants to point out to me that it looks bad, then that is fine with me as long as I like it. My dh likes my hair long, but I basically like to change it up. I can't go long for a loooong time before wanting a change, and the same with it short. If you like your hair, then keep it!! I think it looks great

[Tracie Stroud]

I plan to keep mine long for a while. The last time I cut it short was when I was pregnant with Eli (see avi lol) but it's much longer and curly now. Short hair takes more time to me b/c I have to straighten and style it. When it's long I can leave it wet and just let it curl and style as it dries.

[ripal]

Well, I'm older than you, and I have long hair! I've heard about it too that as you get older, you should have shorter hair, but I can care less. I'm still young at heart, so it will be a long while before I get short hair... if ever!

[jessica31876]

I have always had long hair. I do not like how I look with short hair. I need it cut now but it is about at my bra strap in the back right now. It is really layered though.

[nesser1981]

I think it depends on the person.

I have heard that it can age a person. My mom has long hair, I think it looks better on her when it's just about her shoulders. She is 51.

My MIL had long hair for a which, she usually has short hair and I think it looked terrible on her, I like her look much better with short hair.

I can tell you I'll never have a super short cut because DH would HATE IT! I prefer a nice bob, but DH likes long hair on me, I'm currently growing it out, its about shoulder length.

Do what makes you feel good! To hell with what other people say! LOL!

[Giseli Freitas]

What?!? I'm too old for my long hair?! I'll solve this issue by telling people from now on I'm just 28.
I love my long hair. I need to cut it a bit, tho. I just need someone to tell me about a great hair stylist.
xoxo

[lovely1m]

I do think long hair on many older women does look odd especially if its fully grey. That being said, like Meg, I can't have short hair, too wide of a face. It looks terrible on me. I have gone mid-neck before, but shorter (which I have done) is awful. What sucks, too, is, I can't have too many layers either cause I need to be able to put it into a bun for work everyday. Too many layers and it won't stay back. I hate that it affects my style so much.

[kim21673]

I have heard that and it was imbedded in my brain...I always thought that I had to get my hair chopped when I hit 30....so I did and then let it grow super long again. I will be 39 in a few weeks and have short hair but ONLY because I wanted to donate it (my great nephew has cancer and I donated in his name). I am letting my hair grow out again!! I have SUPER thick, coarse hair and I think I look better with long hair....I am sporting my new short do in my avi but just last week it was a picture of me with very long hair when I was pregnant!!

I don't think age should dictate the length of your hair....as long as you like it is all that matters....of course I do cringe when I see that long scraggly hair that is never trimmed and all uneven! LOL

[Kjersti]

I'll be 41 in a few weeks....my hair is long!

[LeeAndra]

I think some people are anti-long hair due to Hollywood Syndrome. Longer hair is generally associated with being younger, and so many women over the age of 25 have really long hair in Hollywood and often with the longer hair comes the Botox, the wearing age-inappropriate clothing, etc. because our society is so ageist and youth-centric and they want to appear younger than they are to land the juicy roles. Think 'Desperate Housewives of [Insert City Here]' who all look so old in the face and try so hard to look young everywhere else.

Maybe that's the perspective your mother is coming from. Not that you are like those women, but maybe that's what she unconsciously associates longer hair with when she sees you.

[YepBrook]

I agree that some people's hair doesn't age well... like our skin dries out and wrinkles as we get older, our hair will also lose some strength, luster and vibrancy. Also, I believe as we get older hair takes longer to grow, as well as our fingernails. The whole process slooows down. So, I believe older women tend to cut their hair because it's just not looking as nice & healthy being long as it once did. They can keep it colored much easier when it's short, too.

I know there are vitamins and supplements out there that cater to hair & nail health. Something like that might help those of us who want to keep our long hair healthy into your 50's and beyond.

I guess when people say : "too old for long hair" they mean, "hardly anyone your age has long hair". Most have given up on it. But I don't think it's a rule! And if it is, breaking rules is fun sometimes. As long as your hair isn't resembling something like a dried up birds nest, go for it!!!

[SeattleSheri]

I don't think there is a universally right or wrong answer. Some people prefer shorter hair as they age, but I'm not cutting mine any time soon (I'm just a few years younger than you). My mom is in her mid 70's and I think she looks good with hair slightly above her shoulder. Most of my colleagues over 50 wear their hair shorter, but I see lots of mature ladies wearing longer styles that look quite elegant.

Moms can be funny. Mine nagged and nagged me to cover my grey (that I'd been getting since my early 20's). I finally succumbed and it's such a PITB!!

[nonnie]

With my lupus I have to keep my hair shot - it's just too thin to grow out - Last time I tried to grow it out it was disastrous. I have heard the whole long hair age thing - I think that what matters more is how you feel about it - I do think a good hair cut at ANY length will do wonders for you -

[mariewilcox]

Well, I'm older (*cough 49 cough*) and I've had longish hair for a long time (about 4 inches past my shoulders). I do have longer layers around my face (hasn't changed much since my photo here). I have had short hair, but due to my round face I'm not as crazy about it short (I've been plagued with chipmunk cheeks my whole life - even when I weighed 100 pounds in my younger years).

Fortunately I have very thick, very wavy/curly hair so unless it starts to thin out in the future it's staying long.

[momof2angels]

I agree with many of the others. It's a generation thing. Do what you want with you hair. From the looks of your pic, your hair would look fine styled many different ways. I made a HUGE mistake a few years ago. (Oh, by the way, my mom would tell me the same thing.) My hair was to the middle part of my back, and I had went to a local salon to get my hair 'trimmed'. Well, she talked me into cutting my hair short, and by the time I left, I was so upset with myself for letting her do that and was practically in tears. I went to my mom's right after, and she greeted me with, "Oh! I love your hair! It looks good on you!" It absolutely did not! I dreaded when my husband came home from work that evening, because this was not what he was expecting to see. Remember, I was going for a trim. When he came home, he just looked at me with no comment whatsoever. When I went to work the next day, only one person paid a compliment, and I think she was just being 'nice'. Everyone else asked, "why did you cut your hair?" So, take my advice,...Do what you want and what makes you happy. Don't do something you will regret like I did. I am approaching 50 this year, and my hair gets past my shoulders. I would let mine grow longer, but its gotten thinner the past few years, and that doesn't look good to be long and thin, so shoulder length is good enough for me, now. I have actually considered a shorter cut, but we'll see. Only time will tell.

[Amy Carey]

yup I've decided..my hair's not going anywhere as long as boxes of color are sold