introverted extrovert

[emmasmommy]

how's that for an oxymoron??


are you an introvert or an extrovert?
or are you a perfect combination of both?


i tend to be extroverted, BUT, i can be introverted if i don't know you. i think most everyone knows i go through spurts of depression, and during those times, i tend to withdraw into my own little world.

[SmallMoments]

I think I've gone from an introvert as a child, to an extrovert in high school/college/young adulthood, and now I'm heading back into an introvert. It's weird. I usually so prefer to be at home with my family. Once I make myself go out, I have a ton of fun... maybe I'm just lazy. LOL

[mariewilcox]

Definitely an extrovert but I don't mind spending time by myself. I'm not shy but I'm not obnoxious either - so maybe that perfect mix? I don't mind meeting new people and seeing new places and going out on my own to do things.

[LibbysMommy]

Used to be an extrovert but there is no doubt that now I am an introvert.

[erica zane]

I'm a total introvert

[MamaBee]

use to be really outgoing when I was younger... now, I just want to fade into the woodwork...

[Jenn Barrette]

I am a extrovert for sure

[glumirk]

A little of both. I get intimidated in large group situations, but love meeting people in small groups. I usually dread parties and such, but have fun once I get there, so I make myself do it.

[YepBrook]

Extrovert!

Although I've taken a test in counseling once to see if I was Introvert/Extrovert and my result was very borderline. Literally one answer separated me from being an introvert. I can definitely say that my extroverted-ness is 100% ME... my own personality. While my introverted tendencies are very learned behaviors from my mother who is a major introvert.

[krystalhartley]

Based on wikipedia, I'm an ambivert.

An ambivert is normally comfortable with groups and enjoys social interaction, but also relishes time alone and away from the crowd.

[Stacey42]

Introverted. I like being around small groups sometimes & even big groups on rare occasions but I need alone time. Or just a couple of really good friends around. I did a layout for the challenge this month about it.

[mummytothree]

i"m definitely an introvert!! I can go days and days and days without leaving the house or talking to anyone but hubby and the kids and it doesn't phase me a bit!!! I actually enjoy it!!!

[Nettio]

Originally Posted by krystalhartley

Based on wikipedia, I'm an ambivert.

Yep, I'm an ambivert too. I need a good balance of both or I get cranky, haha.

And FYI, you can totally be a shy extrovert. Most people equate shyness and introversion but they are actually different. You can be shy around strangers but still feel energized from being around people as an extrovert. That's how I am.

[sarahbhb]

I'm pretty much an introvert...I hate being around large groups that I don't know. However, I'm ok in smaller groups even if I don't know them. Of course if I do know you and like you I can be silly and stupid and all that other stuff, but if I don't know you I'm pretty reserved. I had a friend in college that described me as "she's quiet until you can't get her to shut up." Still cracks me up.

[taracotta7]

Extrovert for the most part. I can have my introvert moments though.

[farrijc]

Introvert. It's one of those things I wish I could change about myself

[Milmomma]

I think this one sums me up... so I'm neither?

[BrattyMeg]

Originally Posted by farrijc

Introvert. It's one of those things I wish I could change about myself

This is me too

I'm borderline antisocial as well! People bug me :0x

[Lyd]

Originally Posted by Nettio

Yep, I'm an ambivert too. I need a good balance of both or I get cranky, haha.

And FYI, you can totally be a shy extrovert. Most people equate shyness and introversion but they are actually different. You can be shy around strangers but still feel energized from being around people as an extrovert. That's how I am.

Lynnette - I think we are twins. This is totally me, and I think we are alike in so many ways.

I really don't think of introvert/extrovert as shy vs. outgoing. I think of it as what energizes you. Do you feel happy and energized when you're alone and drained when you're around groups of people? Or, does hanging out with friends and larger groups energize you?

I am definitely shy. I'm not good at starting conversations with new people, and it takes me a while to get to know people well. But, nothing lights me up more than hanging out with my good friends and family. I absolutely thrive on it. Of course, there are days when I just want to stay home and do my own thing, too.

Hubby on the other hand is a true introvert, though not necessarily shy. He doesn't have fears about talking to people, but he would never leave the house and interact with other people if he didn't have to. My large family is difficult for him to handle. Even though he loves them all individually, he just gets wiped out mentally and emotionally by being around so many people for very long.

It's something I'm coming to understand about him better all the time, and understanding it has helped our relationship quite a bit. He lets me get out with friends when I need to, I go to family functions without him from time to time, and I am understanding and supportive when he just needs to hide in his cave and regenerate after a stressful work week or whatever.

Psychology is such an interesting thing.

[ZaCola3]

Yes...I'm an ambivert!
I love being home and blocking myself off from the world from time to time but I also love being social and outgoing sometimes too!

[SeattleSheri]

Almost anyone that knows me would describe me as the epitome of an extrovert. As a child, I was very introverted and people have a very hard time believing me when I tell them that.

[sarahbhb]

Originally Posted by Milmomma

I think this one sums me up... so I'm neither?

Oh my gosh..this is perfect! I totally relate.

[maryinaz]

I've always had trouble pegging myself as one or the other, ever since high school. I was in plays, on student council and was a cheerleader back then, and have no problem taking the lead on projects or anything else now.

However, as I get older, I'm getting more into the "leave me alone and no I don't want to go to happy hour" mode. I'm perfectly happy with my own family at home. I cherish my alone time to read, scrapbook, watch my favorite shows. My friends don't get that and I have to come up with excuses as to why I don't want to go to lunch or HH with them. Like right now, there is a HH tomorrow night - I have no legitimate reason not to go. I just don't want to and have no intention of going. I just used "Sorry, can't make it, you all have fun!" last week, so I need to come up with something else this week.

Or yeah, maybe I'm just lazy now.

[KristinCB]

I am what krystal posted I guess..

It takes alot for me to get the ambition to go out but then once i'm out with friends i'm usually ok (depending)

My issues are complex though soo it makes things different (i'm an odd duck)

for the most part I am an introvert though.. I NEED my space and my quiet time and just to be by myself

[nikkiARNGwife]

Most definitely an introvert.

[haydensmommy217]

I'm an ambivert!
there are times when just want to sit in my house and do nothing then there are times i want to be outside and be social

[kendallt]

I've never heard the term "ambivert" before now, but that is so me. I've always said I can get along with pretty much anyone, though some are obviously more of a challenge than others!

[mrshobbes]

I've been studying about it for some time, and for the most part introverts like doing the same activities as extroverts--only with a select group of people, by themselves, or a friend. Extroverts are very comfortable in new environments, like hanging out with people, etc.

I tend to shift from one to the other, but my default is being an introvert. lol

[Freckles]

I used to be an extrovert as a teen, but now I'm most definitely an introvert. I prefer to be alone most of the time and I don't make friends easily.

[Traci Reed]

I'm an introvert, groups of people drain me, even family, and I need to get away to recharge for a while.

[SeattleSheri]

This thread prompted me to look at the definition of an extrovert.

Definition: Most people believe that an extrovert is a person who is friendly and outgoing. While that may be true, that is not the true meaning of extroversion. Basically, an extrovert is a person who is energized by being around other people. This is the opposite of an introvert who is energized by being alone.

Extroverts tend to "fade" when alone and can easily become bored without other people around. When given the chance, an extrovert will talk with someone else rather than sit alone and think. In fact, extroverts tend to think as they speak, unlike introverts who are far more likely to think before they speak. Extroverts often think best when they are talking. Concepts just don't seem real to them unless they can talk about them; reflecting on them isn't enough.

Extroverts enjoy social situations and even seek them out since they enjoy being around people. Their ability to make small talk makes them appear to be more socially adept than introverts (although introverts may have little difficulty talking to people they don't know if they can talk about concepts or issues).

Extrovert behavior seems to be the standard in American society, which means that other behavior is judged against the ways an extrovert would behave. However, extroverted behavior is simply a manifestation of the way an extrovert interacts with the world. Extroverts are interested in and concerned with the external world.

[lovely1m]

introvert for sure.

[Nettio]

Originally Posted by ltarbox

Lynnette - I think we are twins. This is totally me, and I think we are alike in so many ways.

I really don't think of introvert/extrovert as shy vs. outgoing. I think of it as what energizes you. Do you feel happy and energized when you're alone and drained when you're around groups of people? Or, does hanging out with friends and larger groups energize you?

I am definitely shy. I'm not good at starting conversations with new people, and it takes me a while to get to know people well. But, nothing lights me up more than hanging out with my good friends and family. I absolutely thrive on it. Of course, there are days when I just want to stay home and do my own thing, too.

Aww, yay, for being twinsies!

This is totally me too. It's funny because my sister is much more of an introvert than I am and when we were growing up I would always try to get her to do stuff with me and all she'd want to do is sit in her room and read a book. I'm sure I totally annoyed her, haha.

[LeeAndra]

Way introverted. That's why I digitally scrap and Facebook (hide behind a computer) all the time.

[rach3975]

I'm very much an introvert. When I was younger, I could fake it as an extrovert better. But since having kids, I'm around my little people all day long and rarely have a quiet minute. Much as I love them, I find that hard and it stresses me out. By the time the kids are asleep and I get some time to myself, I can't stand the thought of going out with people or calling anyone. I just want to scrap or read.

[webseitler]

Originally Posted by krystalhartley

Based on wikipedia, I'm an ambivert.

I am totally ambivert. I love parties... until the point where I'm drained by interacting with so many people and I just want to go home and never leave the house again.

[krystalhartley]

Yep. I looked it up, too. And it's pretty much what Lydia said. There are times when I need other people to be refueled and find a happy place, and just as often when those same situations would make me feel overwhelmed and lethargic. I stay up at night while my family sleeps specifically for me time because I have to have it to function.

So I need both.

Originally Posted by SeattleSheri

This thread prompted me to look at the definition of an extrovert.

Definition: Most people believe that an extrovert is a person who is friendly and outgoing. While that may be true, that is not the true meaning of extroversion. Basically, an extrovert is a person who is energized by being around other people. This is the opposite of an introvert who is energized by being alone.

Extroverts tend to "fade" when alone and can easily become bored without other people around. When given the chance, an extrovert will talk with someone else rather than sit alone and think. In fact, extroverts tend to think as they speak, unlike introverts who are far more likely to think before they speak. Extroverts often think best when they are talking. Concepts just don't seem real to them unless they can talk about them; reflecting on them isn't enough.

Extroverts enjoy social situations and even seek them out since they enjoy being around people. Their ability to make small talk makes them appear to be more socially adept than introverts (although introverts may have little difficulty talking to people they don't know if they can talk about concepts or issues).

Extrovert behavior seems to be the standard in American society, which means that other behavior is judged against the ways an extrovert would behave. However, extroverted behavior is simply a manifestation of the way an extrovert interacts with the world. Extroverts are interested in and concerned with the external world.

[Lyd]

Originally Posted by krystalhartley

Yep. I looked it up, too. And it's pretty much what Lydia said. There are times when I need other people to be refueled and find a happy place, and just as often when those same situations would make me feel overwhelmed and lethargic. I stay up at night while my family sleeps specifically for me time because I have to have it to function.

So I need both.

We're twins too, Krystal!

[webseitler]

Originally Posted by krystalhartley

Extrovert behavior seems to be the standard in American society, which means that other behavior is judged against the ways an extrovert would behave. However, extroverted behavior is simply a manifestation of the way an extrovert interacts with the world. Extroverts are interested in and concerned with the external world.

Okay... now that I stopped to read this last part, it really makes me sad. My mom is a TOTAL extravert and it constantly judging me for being more of an introvert. Constant guilt... and really bad for at least the last 20 years. Now I have a tool in my tool box to tell her WHY I am okay as I am...

YAY!

[webseitler]

ps. I need to do some journaling about this... man, this is a deep topic once you start to dig into it... the pain, the need for acceptance for who you are... ::sniff::

[YepBrook]

Can I just say how my life is a complete flip-flop of yours Nicole? My mom is an introvert and was constantly urging me to be OK by myself... with limited outside socialization. We rarely had guests in our home, rarely went to anyone's parties (they made her anxious), and when I was little there were only a few friends that were allowed at my house. I think it sculpted and shaped me (a natural Extrovert) into more Introverted behaviors. And I always felt GUILT for wanting to be around more people. LOL! Funny thing, now that I'm an adult I am so conflicted. The freedom to be an Extrovert (people energize me! I love being with people, old friends and lots of new people), but I honestly am more comfortable being a loner.

[Sherri Tierney]

Originally Posted by Nettio

And FYI, you can totally be a shy extrovert. Most people equate shyness and introversion but they are actually different. You can be shy around strangers but still feel energized from being around people as an extrovert. That's how I am.

Exactly! So many people are dead wrong about what makes an introvert vs. an extrovert. People talk like being an introvert is a BAD thing. It is not a bad thing at all. It is just a matter of how you recharge your mental/emotional batteries!!


I am a VERY PROUD introvert It is one of the things I love about myself. It took me a long time to understand it. There is an awesome book called The Introvert Advantage that I think EVERYONE needs to read, even those extroverted people. The world needs both kinds of people to run smoothly. Extroverts are doers while Introverts are thinkers very often. Without the introverts developing the ideas the extroverts wouldn't have anything to put in to action

Many people are pretty close to the line one way or another. Few are on the extreme ends of the spectrum. There are so many misconceptions about introverts and so many people feel like introverts are shy and socially awkward or antisocial or hate being around people, etc. It is so not true! I always confused myself until I began to really understand how I tick. I love people. I love crowds. I love the buzz of energy that I can sense being around big groups. However, these things all leave me drained. I feel totally exhilarated at the time but later I find I have to take time to recover because I have nothing left to give. The bigger the crowd/party/event, etc. the longer my recovery time is. LOL

Now, as a kid I was shy. Painfully shy. I hated it. I was always picked on for being shy and therefore I felt like it was a bad thing. In a way it was since I always let people run over me because I hated confrontation so much. I still hate confrontation but I am much more assertive now and I don't take any crap from anyone. LOL I am not shy any more either. My husband's fault. Really, marrying someone who is super outgoing definitely helped me in the shyness department... so did having kids. I am not aggressively outgoing now but I will start conversations with people I don't know and do things that would have previously made me uncomfortable.

[Sherri Tierney]

Originally Posted by webseitler

Okay... now that I stopped to read this last part, it really makes me sad. My mom is a TOTAL extravert and it constantly judging me for being more of an introvert. Constant guilt... and really bad for at least the last 20 years. Now I have a tool in my tool box to tell her WHY I am okay as I am...

YAY!

A lot of my family has made me feel bad about being introverted. To this day there are cousins as well as my brothers who consider me stuck up because I don't interact with the family the same way they do. Truth be told, my family drains me faster than anything (my extended family, not my immediate family). I can be around them an hour and feel like it has been 12 hours. Because I don't call them all the time and gossip about everyone or go and hang out 'partying' with them then I'm stuck up. My cousins tell people I think I'm better than they are. It is so not true and I just let it go but it irritates me. The funny part is, it is only my cousins who live close to me that feel that way. I have several introverted cousins who just don't live close to me and they totally understand.

[Keely~B]

Lynnette I always thought I've had a lot in common with you too. Maybe you're just uber cool LOL

I'm an introvert. I do think it's seen as a negative attribute a lot of the time and sometimes I think it would be nice if I could lean more the other way but it doesn't feel natural to me. I do enjoy doing things, I like being around people under certain circumstances but I admit, it's not a natural inclination. I don't function well without alone time and I find it wearing to be around a lot of people and to have to be "on".

[Lyd]

Originally Posted by Sherri Tierney

A lot of my family has made me feel bad about being introverted. To this day there are cousins as well as my brothers who consider me stuck up because I don't interact with the family the same way they do. Truth be told, my family drains me faster than anything (my extended family, not my immediate family). I can be around them an hour and feel like it has been 12 hours. Because I don't call them all the time and gossip about everyone or go and hang out 'partying' with them then I'm stuck up. My cousins tell people I think I'm better than they are. It is so not true and I just let it go but it irritates me. The funny part is, it is only my cousins who live close to me that feel that way. I have several introverted cousins who just don't live close to me and they totally understand.

My hubby's sister has been doing this too - making him feel bad for being an introvert. To be honest, his anxiety issues have made him even more introverted, and she just keeps telling him that "he's not the brother he used to be." It makes me sad for him. I do try to defend him as much as I can, but I don't want to create contention with her either.

I think sometimes people equate being an introvert (needing to be alone) with depression. I know that's what my SIL thinks. And, there may be a slight element of that in my hubby's case. But, for the most part, he has a stressful job dealing with some strong personalities. And, when he gets home from that, he seriously needs to recharge, and he does that by being alone. He definitely doesn't need to be around his sisters who are always surrounded by drama.

[usaf_wife10]

I was a HUGE extrovert when I was in high school, but every since I graduated I've become a major introvert. My husband actually made me get out of my PJ's the other day and made me get out of the house since it'd been so long since I'd left. What a meanie

[Lizzy257]

Originally Posted by FlirtatiousBrat

I'm borderline antisocial as well! People bug me :0x

I am most definitely an introvert! And would also describe myself as borderline antisocial . I can be pretty much guaranteed that at least once a day I'll say that I hate people

[nun69]

I am an extrovert and have always been.....but I really do need time alone to recharge and I don't get that so I can get grumpy alot at home....but I really love dealing with people and maybe because I have always been in the medical field, it has always come naturally since I deal with so many different people (staff and pateitns)

[emmasmommy]

i was just asking a silly question, i didn't mean to offend anyone with the 'introvert' or 'extrovert' label. was just a goofy, little let's get everyone thinking question.

[Lyd]

Oh, I don't think anyone is offended at the question, sweets. It's an interesting topic.