Need Prayers for Wisdom!!!

[sprauncey1]

Hey ladies and gents,
Well we just got word of DH's next assignment. We knew it was time and we knew it was probably not what we were hoping for but up until we found out there was still hope for another F-15 assignment.

He got unofficial word (AFPC has still not notified us!!!) that he will be the Kuwaitee Air Force liason. Yes Kuwait. Now comes the really hard part. He can go for a year by himself, or we can go with him sponsored and it is for two years. I am so freaked out right now. Both by the location and by the fact WE have to decide (I have to decide) what to do. Safety is obviously a BIG concern. We would have housing provided, one SUV provided, tuition at a school there provided, etc. There are just so many questions I have/he has and it seems like we are just getting a little tiny information (not even from the right channels).

Oh and did I mention they want him there (after some training) right after Thanksgiving? We have a house in TX to sell, kiddo in 2nd grade, two cars to sell/store/take, etc. Oh and my parents will freak no matter what. They are such worriers, so is my grandma that I'm visiting right now so I haven't told anyone. I feel kinda like a liar when they ask, but since we haven't found out anything in particular I don't want to worry them prematurely.

So pray for wisdom, pray for peace for me! I cannot fall asleep since finding out and cannot wait to get back home to at least be able to discuss it with DH (who is back in TX)!!

OH and for what its worth? What would you do?

[MamaBee]

{{hugs}} wow... what a decision to have to make... and I struggle with when hubby has a conference 2 hours away and if we are going to tag along... and that is like for a day... I just can't imagine what I would do in your situation!

Prayers coming your way! He will guide you to a decision.

[scrap2day]

{{{hugs}}}

Praying that you will have wisdom and peace with this decision.

[heathergw]

(((hugs))) you've got my prayers... I can't even imagine how hard it is making a decision like that.

[Darcy Baldwin]

Will be praying that you guys can make a decision that's perfect for your family.


(assuming Kuwait is relatively safe comparatively to the US - as I assume it generally is, I'd want to go - we would love the opportunity to live outside of the US to experience what life is like outside of our own little world. It would take some hard thinking..and the house would be an issue for us. But it's something we'd really consider!). However, is it worth it to sell everything, including your house, and have to start all over when you come home - or live the year without your husband (will he not even get leave to come home in that year?).

[MandaT]

Praying for you. What a decision to have to make. ((hugs))

[*Celeste*]

I'll be thinking of you.

Here is the Bureau of Consular Affairs page for Kuwait. Maybe that will help?
http://travel.state.gov/travel/cis_p...s/cis_944.html

[HeatherKS]

Lots of love and prayers for you during the decision-making process. *hugs*

FWIW, I'd probably stay in the US. I can't imagine how difficult it would be to be away from my husband for a year, but when I weigh that with uprooting my family, selling houses and cars, and moving across the world, it's probably the way I'd go. That said, I am a homebody and have lived in the same area all my life and my family is all near. I can't imagine leaving here at all so I'm probably no help. :/

[tanyiadeskins]

wow, lots of prayers, that is a very hard choice. I am pretty sure I would go, if it were me. For one thing I think along the lines of Darcy and wanting to experience the life and culture there. For another I would hate to be away from my dh for so long. I do not know how military wives do it, but I admire your strength and commitment.

[Kara]

I'd go, in a heartbeat. I love experiencing new cultures and traveling, and I want my kids to develop a broad worldview, too. Praying for you!

[maryinaz]

For me, it would depend on the kids' ages. Right now, I wouldn't make them leave all their friends and activities - they are all in the process of building their own lives and being less dependent on us, as parents. But if they were younger, I wouldn't hesitate to go. It would be a great adventure and opportunity to grow closer as a family.

[newfiemountiewife]

I'd go too. I would never want to be away from my DH for a year, and I don't think my kids would want that either. But we move often anyway, so we're used to uprooting...we don't really have a "home"

Good luck deciding!

[Jengerbread88]

Sweetheart, I am praying for you. That is a HUGE decision to make, especially for your child. I'll pray for peace, that you can get some sleep, and wisdom, that you and your husband make the right choice for you, and more peace, that you guys can have peace in whatever decision you make. I'll also pray for protection-- for your husband if he goes solo, and for your family if he stays here, and for hope and security, if you two are apart.

As for what you should do, I can't really be of much help to you there... but I can say that I have a very close friend who is a Kuwaiti citizen. She lives there, and from what she has told me, it's VERY safe, at least where she is at (the capital). Of course, there is turmoil all over that part of the world, so I suppose safe is relative, but, her brother is in the military over there and everything and it's not as bad as the media sometimes leads us to believe here.

I also think that it would be difficult separating the family, and it would be nice for your child to be with your husband instead of them being apart for a year (you never know if they'll have to be apart for extended periods of time later that you CAN'T go with, so as long as you can...)

BUT, I would honestly talk to your child. I think children should be included in some decisions. I mean, make it clear that you won't go with exactly what is decided, but will consider allllll of the possibilities and THEN decide... but at least get input on if it's more important to stay with friends/family or go with dad, kwim? I know that my little brother would want the opportunity to give some say, EVEN if his say wasn't what the final answer was, as to whether or not he wanted to be here with friends or there with his dad.

Plus, going might be a really cool experience!

[clearskies]

Ah, the joys of life as a military wife. (As I type this they are packing up my house...)

I say go. Enjoy the adventure. Two years will go by really quickly.

(Oh and four months notice isn't too bad...they gave us three months notice on this coming assignment...) (See intro line...)

[joelsgirl]

{hugs} I bet your mind is all a'swirl right now! I'll be praying, too, for peace and wisdom.

I'd totally go if I were you. I've lived outside of the US for the last 8 years, and I love the experience of a different culture and how it has changed my worldview. Think of it as the great adventure of your lives, and you're bound to have fun with it!

[mummytothree]

tons and tons of prayers and good thought for you!! I'll keep you in my thought and prayers that you can decide what is best for your family!!

I'm sure you are getting lots of different opinions and I'll throw my into the ring, I would not go and I would not take my children to a place with such turmoil. I'll be honest...I don't know a lot of what is going on over in the middle east and that would scare me too. I'm sure you all would be well protected but I think you all would also have limited mobility.....meaning you probably could travel "out" to far and I think that would wear on me too. I think I'd have to decided if I wanted to risk my children not only losing a father but also losing a mother or a sibling. I know it's hard to think of the worst...but as an adult and a parent that's part of my job. Not to say if we stayed behind there was no chance of anything happening to one of us...but I just think being put into a military situation would have to increase the chance.

But I'm a huge paranoid worrywart...so I'm not one to take advice from But you all will still get some extra prayers from me that you can come to a solution that is right for everyone and give you some peace!!!

[NeverendingJen]

DH was stationed for a year in Kuwait, and he loved it. We'd take the entire family. We love being overseas, and it was an amazing experience. Kuwait is an assignment he wouldn't mind again. IF you have questions, just PM me and I'd be glad to ask him what life is like. He was there in 05-06, so its been a few years, but he can at least give some general ideas!

[lovely1m]

Good luck deciding, its a big decision, I am sure. Personally, I would go.

[Angie4b1g]

I wouldn't go. I wouldn't want to move the kids "just" for 2 years. I would rather them stay where they were. My husband travels, though, so I'm used to being without him. Usually only for a week at a time, but I think I'd rather take the 1 year apart than to move the kids all over tarnation twice in 2 years.

[Davita]

Wow! What a huge and difficult decision. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

[KateD]

((hugs)) Not an easy decision, I know. I'd probably be inclined to go if my hubby was stationed there, but it would definitely take some thought and a lot of prayer. When I was deployed to Kuwait in 2003-4 I was in a Bible study with some ladies who were living there because their husbands worked for one of the oil companies & I think they enjoyed living there. Their kids were all older, though. What are the chances your hubby will be stationed where he is now when he gets back? Will you be moving anyway in a year or two? I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers.

[g8rbeckie]

GO! 2nd and 3rd grade kids can still make friends and adjust. I can't imagine life without DH for a year, so at least together you guys can make and adventure of it.

good luck making your decision, I know it must be so hard

[dgreenshield]

I will be sending prayers up for you and your family.

That being said, I would go. We were in Dubai, I know it's not Kuwait, and my son still to this day loves the time we spent in the middle east even over our time in Singapore. I have had friends who are in the armed forces and they were hooked up with a mentor family...can they give you a contact to talk to over there before you make your decision?

[nun69]

I was stationed in Kuwait for 8 months I wasn't allowed to leave the base just beacuse of the assignment I was fulfilling, but all of the satff that worked on base that lived OFF base with their families, absolutely LOVED it. I am not completely sure of the details, but image the things you can see and places you could go. I also have a friend {that I have known for 30 years} that was stationed ove rthere on active duty, retired and then went back as a civilian. He was lucky enough to meet his finace there. So If your kids are young, I think it is an opportunity your whole family would enjoy. They have customes that are not like ours that you will learn about and have to kind of abide by, but it is nothing extreme. If you would like to get connected with him to get a little more insigt of the living off base aspect, please let me know and I will contact him and get his email

But I am one that had all 4 of my children in the military and my children adapted very well each time we moved. Actually the hardest move for us was locally!

[rach3975]

What a tough decision! I honestly don't know what I'd do. I'm not sure I'd feel safe moving my kids to Kuwait for 2 years (though I'd have to do some research before I decided), but I also don't think I could stay here and be without DH for a full year. We're too far from family and don't have close enough friends here...I think I'd either go with him or move closer to family for a year.

I have a friend whose DH works for the State Department who has been in both situations. About 5 years ago her DH was stationed in a war zone in the Middle East for a year, and she had to manage without him with 2 very young kids (3 yrs. and 6 mo). It was a very long year for her, but going with him wasn't an option and she was glad she could keep her job. Currently he's stationed in Jordan for 2 years, and the entire family went with him this time. I think they're all happy they went and are enjoying the experience. They rented out their house for the 2 years so that they'll still have it to come back to. She's a lawyer but can't work there, and I'm honestly not sure how she feels about that.

[scrappurple]

Wow ... that is such a hard decision. I have no idea what we would do either. For what it is worth, thank you.

[mariewilcox]

That is a tough one! I'm thankful that we never had to make the choice - DH was sent to hot spots and we weren't allowed to go, so we always stayed on whatever base he was stationed at. But then, with the Marines it was never for longer than 9 months at a time either -no 1-year or 2-year stints (although sometimes he wouldn't be stateside long between stints). For me it was just the way military life was - having him gone a lot and being used to it. Having lived that way I would stay put with my kids and not uproot them, BUT then again, yours is young still and it might be interesting to live over there. We only lived overseas as a family when DS was a baby/toddler - once he started school we were back at Pendleton, and then the Gulf War started and DH was gone a lot.

I will send positive thoughts your way for lots of wisdom in making your decision.

[sprauncey1]

thank you all for your kind words and prayers.
I wanted to answer a few of your questions .
this is our regular time to move so pretty much no matter what we would be moving and selling our house anyway .
all our family lives far far away in the pacific northwest .
so I would either be going with him for moving up close to family , either way moving it's just about timing .
my boys are 7 and almost 5 .
life in the military , never a dull moment ! Or move!

[kscwgirl]

If you would be moving and selling your house anyway, then I would go. Good luck deciding!!