Ish is about to get real

[hollyxann]

Time to come clean. I need some where to turn and I feel comfortable talking about it here.

I've had this gut feeling for about a month now that something was going on with Jay and sure enough I was right. He was cheating on me. I found out last Friday. At first he didn't admit it and then as I pressed harder he came clean. My entire life has just been picked up and then dropped. 8 years and a baby later this is how he repays me. He swears he didn't have a sexual relationship with her but I'm not even sure about that at this point. The last week has been a roller coaster. I've felt every emotion possible...and some I didn't even know existed. Things haven't been sunshine and rainbows in our relationship for a while now but I didn't think it would ever come to this. We have decided to try and work it out and work through it as a couple. We've had some good talks in the last week but I know that I am still personally struggling and probably will for awhile. We have committed to individual and couples therapy which I am hoping helps us. I want my life back, my family back, my "husband" back. I know it will never be the same and I don't even want that. I want to start over, build a new better relationship. Work through this, forget it and move on.

That's why I've been very MIA lately.

[YepBrook]

Oh, Holly! I am so sorry! This is so sad. I hope you two can mend what's been broken and improve your relationship. Couples counseling is really helpful, but be prepared for it to make things even harder for a little while before they get better because EVERYTHING will come to the surface.

((BIG HUGS))

[SweetMelissa]

I'm so sorry. I had gone through something very similar myself this year. I wish you both the best of luck on trying to work it out.

[misfitinmn]

Oh gosh, Holly! Big humongous bear hugs for you! Sending you strength as you try to build a new path and work things out. I'll be thinking of you, and hope that the counseling helps you work through all of these emotions!

[abm234]

I am so sorry Holly! I am so glad to hear he is willing to try therapy. Hugs and prayers!

[MamaBee]

I'm soo sorry to hear this!! Many prayers and hugs that you two get through this stronger than ever!

[adi&co.]

hugs! I know you don't know me, but it's been almost 4 years since I found out my hubby cheated on me and i can honestly say that we've never been in a better place than we are now. it's weird to say, but going thorugh all of that has made us stronger as a couple. if you ever need an ear or want to chat, feel free to PM me

[carrie1977]

Oh, Holly....I'm so sorry hun. I hope that the therapy will allow you to build a stronger relationship and move forward from what has happened. Big hugs to you!!

[SeattleSheri]

I'm sorry you're going through that, that's really tough. Big hugs.

[nietis]

*hugs* SO sorry, Holly... I hope things work out, especially the therapy! <3

[Julie Billingsley]

oh sweetie, I'm so sorry to hear this ((hugs)) I am glad you two are going to counseling, and I'll be hoping you can come back from this even stronger!

[taracotta7]

So sorry, Holly!!!! You have been on my mind all week and now I know why. Sending you lots of hugs. I hope that in time and with help you two are able to work through this and become stronger than ever. ((HUGS))

[NeverendingJen]

big hugs, my lovely eyes <3 I'm here. PM me if you want to talk.

[Traci Reed]

I'm so sorry Holly! I know it can be come back from if that's what you both want and work towards. Hugs to you!

[hollyxann]

Thanks everyone. I am trying to be optimistic. I have faith we can get through it but I know its going to be a long road.

[jacinda]

Oh Holly...I'm so sorry! Huge hugs and prayers from me.

[MissKim]

So sorry. That just sucks.

[KristinCB]

huge big hugs!!! thoughts are with you <3 kudos for trying to work through and go through therapy together - here is hoping you come out stronger than ever

[MommaTrish]

((hugs)) I'll be praying for the two of you.

[Libby Pritchett]

I'm so sorry, Holly! *HUGS* I can't even imagine.

[Mari Koegelenberg]

I am so sorry Holly. Hugs girly...you are strong and an amazing woman. You will get through this and be stronger and better. <3

[Txcorey]

Hugs Holly. That's tough. I hope everything works out for y'all.

[MandaT]

Much love and prayers to you Holly.

[webseitler]

Oh, sweetie. I'm so sorry to hear about this. I hope that bringing everything up to the surface will be a blessing in disguise for you both! It's yucky. It's hard. But I hope that in the end it will be something that brings you all closer together. Big hugs!

[nun69]

big {{{HUGS}}} Holly.....

[Kara]

Oh no, how devastating! I wish you only the best as you work through this.

[BrattyMeg]

((Hugs))

[Shawna Clingerman]

Holly I am SO SO SORRY you have to go though this! I know it is heartbreaking and frustrating and lonely and I'll be praying you can find comfort and peace through it all. Please make sure YOU have some people you can really open up to to help you get through this all - working it out can be hard when you have a zillion feelings that you are stuffing deep inside for the sake of your relationship - make sure you get your needs met and that you don't let yourself feel alone

We are rooting for you here! I'm glad he agreed to counseling that seems like a really wise next step! Big BIG hugs to you sweetie!

[marlathrall]

I'm so sorry.

[rach3975]

I'm so sorry that you're going through this! I hope the counseling helps you move past it and onto to something stronger and better together.

[joelsgirl]

So sorry, Holly. : ( What a terrible betrayal, but I'm so glad you guys are going to try to work through it. I know it will be hard, and I wish I could be there for hugs and long sob sessions with expensive coffee.

[NatalieKW]

Holly! I'm so so sorry!! Big big hugs!!

[lovely1m]

Oh, Holly, I will keep you in my thoughts. Sending hugs.

[jk703]

So sorry Holly! Sending positive thoughts, prayers and hugs! Every day you will take a step closer and the long road will soon be short. Keep your chin up!

[MandM13]

So sorry to hear about this. Speaking from experience this is something that can be very hard and confusing. I wish you the best...but I agree with the rest of the gals here....make sure YOU are doing whats best for YOU and not what others think or tell you need to do. Only YOU will know what is going to be the best for you.
I'll be thinking of you!

[DawnMarch]

I'm so sorry to hear that, Holly. I agree that it sucks! I think it's more common than many would like to admit and many people do manage to work through this painful stuff. Hugs!!

[rachaelsscraps]

I'm so sorry, hugs! I hope you two can work it out and get stronger as a couple!

[dana]

(((hugs))) !!!

[hollyxann]

Thank you so much everyone. The last week has been hell. I just want off this roller coaster. I am hopeful and optimistic that everything will work itself out. I have some great support around me and it really helps to have such a great community here at SSD to come to. Please continue to send any and all positive thoughts and prayers as I know the road ahead isn't going to be easy.

[mrshobbes]

I am so sorry ((HUG))

[fifilur]

I'm so so sorry! Unfortunately, I know how it feels.
Take care of yourself! HUGS

[Summer_Mom3]

I'm so sorry. Marriage counseling can work miracles. It's a lot of work and may take more of yourself than you ever thought possible to forgive and learn to trust again but it is possible! I've been down a similar road earlier this year and trusting again is absolutely the hardest part. It's also the most rewarding part though to let go of the hurt, anger, and control. Prayers for you and your husband to work it out.

[Chels85]

i'm so sorry to hear. it will prob take time to heal, but things will get better ((hugs))

[Kjersti]

I think you should consider leaving him. You are young and beautiful and deserve to be treated like a princess. The past is the best indicator of the future....and he's obviously shown his true colors. You don't want to live the rest of your life looking over your shoulder wondering if he's cheating on you again.

Each day gets easier....I promise.