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Old 04-13-2012, 11:02 PM
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Default I want to know your personal opinion

And please let's keep it nice.

Just curious, what was your reaction to Hilary Rosen's comment on CNN about Stay-at-Home-Moms?

(also, let it be known that I do not represent any political parties LOL!)
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Old 04-13-2012, 11:12 PM
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I may get stoned to death for saying this, and I am not a fan of Rosen at all... but I can SORT OF see both sides to this.

-Obviously, stay at home moms work their butts off. They work hard, they do a LOT around the house, and they do about a million and twelve things every single day. I would know- I'm a stay at home mom.

-HOWEVER, I think that what happened was that Hilary Rosen kind of... mis-said what she was saying, basically. I think that what she was TRYING to say was that Ann Romney doesn't understand the working class as well as someone who has worked outside the home.

It doesn't make what she said right, and I absolutely understand the outrage. I think it was just a mis-spoken comment, and I think it is something that needs to be discussed, but I don't think it was meant to sound the way it did.

Just my opinion.
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Old 04-13-2012, 11:12 PM
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I don't really read politics or even watch the news anymore these days, but I did go see what she had to say and my only though is this....

I worked for the past 20 years in the Navy, retired and then became a SAHM{I had all of my children while I was on active duty} ....for me presonally, being a SAHM was harder and absolutely MORE work than I had done over 20 years of service! So I went back to work

but seriously I don't think you can really compare "working" moms , per say, to stay at home moms.....we all do are part whether we work full time or stay home full time ....one is just as hard and just as rewarding as the other
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Old 04-13-2012, 11:19 PM
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but seriously I don't think you can really compare "working" moms , per say, to stay at home moms.....we all do are part whether we work full time or stay home full time ....one is just as hard and just as rewarding as the other
This exactly.
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Old 04-13-2012, 11:20 PM
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I think in a sense she had a valid point she was trying to make but went about it totally the wrong way. Ann Romney has never held a job outside the home so she has NO clue how hard it is to work and raise children and certainly no expert in women's employment concerns. She's had the luxury of being able to stay home and raise her boys so she doesn't know the experience of feeling guilty about going to work while somebody else watches after your kids or what its like to struggle balancing work and family. To say she's never WORKED is absurd though. She has held the hardest job in the world for many years now. Was poorly chosen words on Rosen's part.

She alienated the SAHMs, she has the attention and maybe agreement of moms that work outside the home, and has probably managed to make some women (struggling out of a job moms) even turn against the Romneys
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Old 04-13-2012, 11:23 PM
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^^^this

I think it got blown totally out of proportion because it was a convenient distraction from the real issue.
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Old 04-13-2012, 11:24 PM
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I'm sure SAHM work hard but so do Moms who work outside the home AND at home because they do both jobs.

I think my house might be cleaner if I didn't work full time as I'm too tired to do more work when I get home. I tell a lot of young women "if you can find a way to stay home with those babies, do it" because I know I missed out on a lot not being a stay at home Mom.

maybe my kids would have turned out better (not that they are THAT bad) but I always wonder... esp with all the time I spent on the computer when they were younger
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Old 04-13-2012, 11:25 PM
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I found this comment regarding it that I think probably gets close to the mistake on both sides.

"She was merely trying to point out that it's probably not the wisest decision for a wealthy candidate to rely on his privileged spouse to provide guidance on issues that face typical American women who are employed outside the home earning a paycheck that is essential to the economic survival of their families."

What is a 'typical american woman'? There is no 'typical american' woman. There are just lots of women, doing lots of different kinds of things, living lots of types of lifestyles. To lump us all into one place (in whatever way you want) would just leave a bunch of the other ones out. It's the 'lumping' that is the problem.

I think there are ALL kinds of women out there. Some of us are SAHM where our spouses earn a paycheck outside the home. Some of us a SAHM and we earn paychecks when we work in the home for outside people. Some of us are Mom's that are single mothers that have to work outside the home to put food on the table. I personally know atleast one of each of these kinds of women. They all do what's right for their families and their situations.

None of them are better than the other. And because my experience fits into one of those categories above, I would be capable of commenting on my experience. But I would also in no way feel qualified to comment on the experience of another. My way is my way. No less, no more, just me. And someone elses way is their way.
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Old 04-13-2012, 11:26 PM
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Originally Posted by Traci Reed View Post
^^^this

I think it got blown totally out of proportion because it was a convenient distraction from the real issue.
Agree with that! The point Rosen was trying to make is that Romney is using Ann as a personal consultant on Women's Employment Concerns when she has no real clue about working outside the home. Sadly it was handled totally wrong so the real point Rosen was trying to make is lost in social media
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Old 04-13-2012, 11:29 PM
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Originally Posted by kristijoy View Post
I found this comment regarding it that I think probably gets close to the mistake on both sides.

"She was merely trying to point out that it's probably not the wisest decision for a wealthy candidate to rely on his privileged spouse to provide guidance on issues that face typical American women who are employed outside the home earning a paycheck that is essential to the economic survival of their families."

What is a 'typical american woman'? There is no 'typical american' woman. There are just lots of women, doing lots of different kinds of things, living lots of types of lifestyles. To lump us all into one place (in whatever way you want) would just leave a bunch of the other ones out. It's the 'lumping' that is the problem.

I think there are ALL kinds of women out there. Some of us are SAHM where our spouses earn a paycheck outside the home. Some of us a SAHM and we earn paychecks when we work in the home for outside people. Some of us are Mom's that are single mothers that have to work outside the home to put food on the table. I personally know atleast one of each of these kinds of women. They all do what's right for their families and their situations.

None of them are better than the other. And because my experience fits into one of those categories above, I would be capable of commenting on my experience. But I would also in no way feel qualified to comment on the experience of another. My way is my way. No less, no more, just me. And someone elses way is their way.
well said!

In the end, I don't know of any politician who can really "speak" for the average American (man or woman). if you've never been the average, how can you know or even begin to understand what it's like in the middle class?
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Old 04-13-2012, 11:40 PM
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well said!

In the end, I don't know of any politician who can really "speak" for the average American (man or woman). if you've never been the average, how can you know or even begin to understand what it's like in the middle class?
Agree!

And I also think that unless you've actually been someone like...say....Melinda Gates (wife of Bill Gates), it would be hard to comment on how much or little she works! She's an american woman too!
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Old 04-14-2012, 12:16 AM
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All moms work. Period. I also know that being a stay at home mom is not ALWAYS what you personally want to do but know that it is better for your family whether it be for personal reasons like wanting to be with your kids or realizing that daycare would take most of your paycheck so you stay home for financial reasons. There were times in my life where I would have loved to have another adult around to talk to as a stay at home mom who did not know many other women who were also stay at home moms (pre-internet times LOL). And times where I was there for things I would have otherwise missed and am thankful for those everyday. I cannot speak for the struggles of a mom who works ouside the home. I can speak only for myself and kinda think the woman who made the comment should realize she can really only speak for HERSELF.

ETA: I do not mean for the first statement to be mean or harsh I just know my own experience and that of close friends and have seen work at home moms (my sister did internet call center calls in her home), moms who work outside the home and those who stay home with their kids and they all work in some way pretty much all day until bedtime and most are thinking when going to bed about what they have to do tomorrow

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Old 04-14-2012, 01:00 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kristijoy View Post
I found this comment regarding it that I think probably gets close to the mistake on both sides.

"She was merely trying to point out that it's probably not the wisest decision for a wealthy candidate to rely on his privileged spouse to provide guidance on issues that face typical American women who are employed outside the home earning a paycheck that is essential to the economic survival of their families."

What is a 'typical american woman'? There is no 'typical american' woman. There are just lots of women, doing lots of different kinds of things, living lots of types of lifestyles. To lump us all into one place (in whatever way you want) would just leave a bunch of the other ones out. It's the 'lumping' that is the problem.

I think there are ALL kinds of women out there. Some of us are SAHM where our spouses earn a paycheck outside the home. Some of us a SAHM and we earn paychecks when we work in the home for outside people. Some of us are Mom's that are single mothers that have to work outside the home to put food on the table. I personally know atleast one of each of these kinds of women. They all do what's right for their families and their situations.

None of them are better than the other. And because my experience fits into one of those categories above, I would be capable of commenting on my experience. But I would also in no way feel qualified to comment on the experience of another. My way is my way. No less, no more, just me. And someone elses way is their way.
I agree with this. None of us is really qualified to comment on any situation other than our own.

However, if we're really talking about women who are struggling and working to provide the essentials for their family, then I think it would be really hard to find any politician or politician's spouse (male or female) who can "advise" on what that life is like. If they grew up in a poor family, then I guess they would have a better understanding. But, my impression of almost all our politicians is that they are fairly out-of-touch with what "average" Americans deal with in their everyday lives.

Guess my frustration with Washington politics is coming out a bit. Sorry.
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Old 04-14-2012, 08:06 AM
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I think it was a poorly thought out statement that is now being used to divert attention from the real issue of the economy. It's much easier & more dramatic for the media to focus on a 'mommy war' than the non dramatic & kind of dull problem of the economy itself. Not to mention the fact that really, there is nothing any politician can do fix it.

I agree with others here who've said that politician in general are not qualified to speak on the problems of the middle or lower class. I seriously doubt any of them had a month where they had to debate between paying for car repairs or paying the electric bill or paying for a painful broken tooth to be repaired or paying the mortgage or spent 6 months looking for work. I don't think Ann Romney is at all qualified to speak on women's economic issues unless she has a degree in the field and is working in it. I don't think anyone is without those qualifications. Ann probably has a very good grasp of life on a mid 6 figure salary but not so much of one about life on $50,000.
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Old 04-14-2012, 08:12 AM
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So maybe the solution would be to make any politician, especially one looking at the presidency, to go through a certain period-- say 6 months or so-- of having a limited amount of money to live off of, to have to choose what bills to pay now and which can wait until you get paid again, to live off of whatever food happens to be on sale at the grocery store, etc...

Then they might have a better grasp of what many Americans are going through.

ETA: Obviously this will never happen... but I think it would help tremendously.
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Old 04-14-2012, 09:12 AM
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I personally see both sides of the story. I see where the Romney's are coming from and I see where Rosen is coming from. I work full time outside the home, but that doesn't mean I think someone who has always been a SAHM doesn't understand about women's issues facing those of us that do work. I wish women would stop bashing women and stick together. But honestly, I think it all comes down to politics. I think if the situation was reversed and Rosen was a SAHM and Ann Romney worked outside the home, you would still see those defending Rosen now defending her and those defending Romney now defending her. I believe the majority of people in this country defend actions/opinions and make decisions based on party lines.
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Old 04-14-2012, 10:46 AM
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I've always said the our politicians need to be salaried at what the national average income is minus health care for their family.

AND.... if we the people chose not to re-elect someone, we basically are firing them from the job so no wages/benefits the rest of his/her life.

and obviously THAT is not going to happen but I think it's a good idea LOL
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Old 04-14-2012, 10:48 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kristijoy View Post
I found this comment regarding it that I think probably gets close to the mistake on both sides.

"She was merely trying to point out that it's probably not the wisest decision for a wealthy candidate to rely on his privileged spouse to provide guidance on issues that face typical American women who are employed outside the home earning a paycheck that is essential to the economic survival of their families."

What is a 'typical american woman'? There is no 'typical american' woman. There are just lots of women, doing lots of different kinds of things, living lots of types of lifestyles. To lump us all into one place (in whatever way you want) would just leave a bunch of the other ones out. It's the 'lumping' that is the problem.

I think there are ALL kinds of women out there. Some of us are SAHM where our spouses earn a paycheck outside the home. Some of us a SAHM and we earn paychecks when we work in the home for outside people. Some of us are Mom's that are single mothers that have to work outside the home to put food on the table. I personally know atleast one of each of these kinds of women. They all do what's right for their families and their situations.

None of them are better than the other. And because my experience fits into one of those categories above, I would be capable of commenting on my experience. But I would also in no way feel qualified to comment on the experience of another. My way is my way. No less, no more, just me. And someone elses way is their way.
Kristi said it perfectly. it's sad that as women, we feel the need to defend our decisions & to put down other women. being everything we need to be is tiresome...putting down other women or judging them just makes it so much worse.
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Old 04-14-2012, 11:25 AM
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I can't find the exact comment, just references to it. Anyone want to link me up?
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Old 04-14-2012, 11:57 AM
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However, if we're really talking about women who are struggling and working to provide the essentials for their family, then I think it would be really hard to find any politician or politician's spouse (male or female) who can "advise" on what that life is like. If they grew up in a poor family, then I guess they would have a better understanding. But, my impression of almost all our politicians is that they are fairly out-of-touch with what "average" Americans deal with in their everyday lives.

Guess my frustration with Washington politics is coming out a bit. Sorry.
this.
Find me someone who is lower middle class who is a woman who has had to go back and forth between working full time, part time, and staying home because the balance of wages to childcare isn't sufficient and then I'll care what any of them have to say on the subject.
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Old 04-14-2012, 11:58 AM
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I thought it was a ridiculous comment for her to make. For one thing, ALL moms work hard no matter if they stay at home, or work outside the home. My mom worked outside the home when I was little, but she NEVER missed a school event of mine or my siblings, we always had meals on the table prepared by her, and we always came home to a clean home and had clean clothes. She worked her butt off in and out of the home.

For her to make a comment like that was ridiculous. She should have thought it through better before making it. It's a classic example of foot in mouth.
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Old 04-14-2012, 12:13 PM
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I find it totally ridiculous when any politician for attacking another for being "too rich" that they are out of touch, because seriously- they are all out of touch with real Americans.

I don't have kids yet, but when I do I will totally be a stay at home mom. Why? Because my current income is so low that I'd be paying a large portion of it just in daycare. And I have a college degree and did everything "right." This economy just sucks, period... especially in the area I live in.

To say that any stay at home mom doesn't get the economy is ridiculous though. Most are doing the shopping- seeing first hand how much food, clothes, etc are going up. Most are making sacrifices so that their family can get by on one income. And all of them are working their asses off.
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Old 04-14-2012, 12:30 PM
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I think her biggest mistake was to say she's never worked a day in her life (cuz like someone else said if you're a mom you work..end of story). But as far as the luxury of staying home...I'm pretty sure it cost me more to work outside of the home than what I actually earned. As a SAHM we get by with one car, when I worked we had a second car payment, plus insurance for said car, child care (and for only one child...i know i would have spent more than I made if there were two or more children), and the little things like more frequent haircuts and clothes that actually fit and weren't stained add up as well. But I loved my job, felt like I was making a difference, and got to spend some time with other adults (at the time my husband traveled for work so I would go anywhere from one week to two months without seeing him) and my husband made a lot more money than he does now so it was easier to justify the second car. It's not always more cost effective to go to work than it is to stay home if you're willing to do without some things (such as a second car). Maybe staying home is a luxury, I definitely know I love staying home and homeschooling my daughter, but also knowing that it would cost me more to go to work than to just stay home made it easier to make that decision.
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Old 04-14-2012, 12:51 PM
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Agree with that! The point Rosen was trying to make is that Romney is using Ann as a personal consultant on Women's Employment Concerns when she has no real clue about working outside the home. Sadly it was handled totally wrong so the real point Rosen was trying to make is lost in social media
yep!

I actually think this helped Romney a little bit with women though, and they are certainly squeezing as much out of it as they possibly can.
Let's move on to the real issues.
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Old 04-14-2012, 01:05 PM
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I work 3 days a week and am home 4 days a week. I can tell you that both are work. A LOT of work.

But I also think that election year politics are taking over....we all know what Rosen meant, that in terms of financial struggles, Anne Romney never had to work at all.

Still, not the smartest comment ever.
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Old 04-14-2012, 01:28 PM
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I don't even know who Hilary Rosen is!?!?! Not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing!!!
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Old 04-14-2012, 01:35 PM
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I don't even know who Hilary Rosen is!?!?! Not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing!!!
LOL same here! What I do know is I'm already over this election and it's barely April. Why does it have to drag out soooooooooo long??
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Old 04-14-2012, 03:08 PM
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LOL same here! What I do know is I'm already over this election and it's barely April. Why does it have to drag out soooooooooo long??
Only 206 days until it's over!!!

Rosen is an Democrat political strategist... She doesn't work for Obama though (which he was happy to proclaim this week.) She was at the White House last week for a political dinner. Not that this matters at all, but she's a lesbian with twins and is separated from her partner. So she should be a single mother from time to time?
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Old 04-14-2012, 06:24 PM
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I definitely agree that just about everyone in Washington is out of touch with "real" Americans - men and women. I do think it was just foot-in-mouth syndrome, though, and it's been completely blown out of proportion. I got the point that she was trying to make and took no offense to it as a SAHM.

I DO think Ann Romney can't relate to the day-to-day struggles of my family. I also think I can't relate to many other families, too. Not because we're rich, but we do well and have for awhile and we're very thankful for that. I come from a middle class family and don't know what it's like to struggle to put dinner on the table. I've never had to choose to pay one bill over another. I feel for those families and empathize with them deep from my heart, but I no more understand their struggles than someone a bazillion dollars richer than myself.
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Old 04-14-2012, 07:16 PM
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First off, I hate politics for the very reason so many of you mentioned, most politicians are out of touch with real Americans.

I respect and admire all moms and I believe we all work, outside or inside the home, with the same goal in mind; taking care of our families the best we can. It's a labor of love.
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Old 04-14-2012, 11:23 PM
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Wow, thanks for all the comments everyone! Some awesome opinions on here.
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Old 04-15-2012, 12:22 AM
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Originally Posted by Stacey42 View Post

I agree with others here who've said that politician in general are not qualified to speak on the problems of the middle or lower class. I seriously doubt any of them had a month where they had to debate between paying for car repairs or paying the electric bill or paying for a painful broken tooth to be repaired or paying the mortgage or spent 6 months looking for work. I don't think Ann Romney is at all qualified to speak on women's economic issues unless she has a degree in the field and is working in it. I don't think anyone is without those qualifications. Ann probably has a very good grasp of life on a mid 6 figure salary but not so much of one about life on $50,000.
Yes Yes Yes -

I too agree that the issue is blown WAY out of wack -
I do have to say that I have been both a SAHM and off and on including now a working mom - It was so much harder to go from a SAHM to a working mom - I feel like nothing is ever done - I HATE working (like my job) I have NO time for myself - I did as a SAHM - My house is a disaster and I feel like my kids get the shout end of the stick - but because I work we do not struggle with our finances and we have money to see Europe with the kids - It's a really rough trade off and a really personal decision. I don't believe that anyone is really qualified to speak on this situation in generalizations - every family is different -
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