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Something "bad" that you are proud of
In a meeting today, my boss told me I would like a new employee that was coming on board because she was "just as honest, blunt and pushy" as I am and "is not afraid to make a decision." I think it was a compliment for the most part, but it got me to thinking about myself, especially the pushy part.
Pushy has a negative connotation to it, but I can be very pushy, especially if there is a deadline looming. My job is pretty fast paced and things can often go awry, so making fast decisions is part of it. I am pretty impatient with people who can't make a decision in the time I need them to, so I am not at all adverse to making it myself and getting things done. My boss knows that I am going to do what I think is best and tell him about it later, and he is comfortable with that. So yes, if that is pushy, than I am proudly pushy. I am not as pushy in my personal life, but I am not a pushover either. LOL I am also pretty blunt, which most people think is mean, but that is never my intention. I think it goes back to being impatient; I don't have the desire to waste time beating around the bush so I just lay it all out. I equate it with being honest. I do realize that I may lack some tack on occasion but I do not think people, adults, need to be handled with "kid's gloves." The facts are the facts and we all need to deal with the facts. Again, this is much more pronounced in my work persona than my personal one, but it exists there as well. So after thinking about what my boss said, I came to the conclusion that pushy and blunt may not be the most complimentary of terms, but I am both, and, you know what, I am fine with it. I've also been told I am stubborn, but I counter with, no I am just determined. It is sorta the same, but the later sounds better. LOL Do you have a trait that you gladly lay claim to that might not be considered positive at first glance, but really is? If so, tell me about it and how/why you think it makes you a better person. I certainly can't be the only one who has "negative" traits that have served her well in life.
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Last edited by LJSDesigns; 07-22-2021 at 11:41 PM. |
#2
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I am a control freak & bullheaded to a fault. Everyone who knows me knows it & either puts up with it or doesn't hang out with me.
Control freaks get things done! They also generally know what's going on & can be counted on to plan and execute things. Being bullheaded means that I go after what I want and don't fold when an obstacle crops up. Last edited by LeeAndra; 07-23-2021 at 12:04 AM. |
#3
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Oh boy... that's a hard one. I don't like thinking about myself.
I'm definitely a control freak and it does make me a great organizer and planner. I can also be blunt like you Lorie and I do put it on the side of being honest. If people don't like it then so be it.
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I think a lot of these "bad" traits are only perceived as bad because we're women and that badness is pushed upon us. When is the last time you heard someone describe a man "pushy" at work? I never have. It's called a "can-do attitude", he's "getting things done", etc. Woman are called pushy or bossy, or my personal favorite, "demanding" when exhibiting the same behavior.
I give no consideration to a negative assessment of who I am unless it's not based in sexism, racism, or any other conscious or unconscious bias and that it comes from someone who really knows me, not some rando. It's very freeing. |
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I'm a perfectionist. It does have negative connotations, and some of them are true. It takes me forever to feel like I have enough information to make a good decision. (We could never work together, Lorie! Then again, part of the reason DH and I work is that I'm the family researcher and gather all the necessary info, and DH is a quick-decision-maker type who relies on my research.) But it also means I'm organized and detail oriented. Bosses love me because I'm careful and thorough. In my personal life I'm willing to put a lot of time and effort into anything that I consider worthwhile, and it usually pays off in the long run.
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Last edited by rach3975; 07-23-2021 at 08:11 PM. |
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I've been told I'm "too positive". Does that count? I understand toxic positivity and that's not me at all. However, I've had a few co-workers say "you're just too positive all the time" or "you look on the bright side of everything, don't you?" and they don't say it in a kind manner. This is usually when they are complaining and want someone to complain with them. I validate their feelings and say I can commiserate but that I have to look at it in a different light. Honestly, I've been that negative, pessimistic, person and I was angry and bitter all the time. It really did some damage to me. I don't want to go to that place again!
My temper would be the next thing. I have a long fuse. Now that I am a more positive person, it takes a lot for me to get angry. When I do, it isn't pretty. I'm your stereotypical redhead when it comes to my temper. I've been known to scare people when I get mad. They don't expect it from me and never see it coming so when it does they are usually left with their mouths hanging open. I don't consider it a bad thing though. I can control myself and my outbursts are never inappropriate for the audience. I consider it my secret weapon sometimes and use it to get stuff done, or to get things changed, when I feel that it is important.
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Best compliment I have ever had is when a former employee told me that she learned a lot from me, but she felt the most important thing she had learned is that happiness is something we choose, and I had taught her to choose it on a daily basis, which had made her a much happier and better person. (Yes, I say it a lot! LOL) I am not a redhead, but I have the same kind of temper, slow to burn, but a powder keg when it goes off. I think there are some who do not understand that kind, happy or positive people will only be pushed so far and then, bam!
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definitely stubborn (but have got better as I've got older about that one), definitely determined.
I think I get some of those traits from my mum.....growing up when I was in and out of the public hospital system waiting for surgeries and tests etc, she was known as "that damn Canadian woman again" but she got things going...
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