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Old 02-04-2014, 02:18 PM
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Default have you ever been to a wedding with no ceremony?

only the reception? How did that go over? Personally....... out of all the weddings I've been in or to.. i really loathed that ceremony part. It's long and boring and dreadful. I especially hated being a bridesmaid because while, obviously, i was not THE center of attention.. I was up there and it was so painfully uncomfortable for me. Especially walking down the aisle thing first guh.

I think a reception only wedding sounds brilliant. No stuffy boring part, the bride and groom get to declare their love for each other in private and then everyone can celebrate together afterwards and feel included that way.
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:22 PM
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I think a ceremony with a small family attendance is good and then a reception for everyone. We kept our wedding really short because it was MY wedding and I was board being up there. HA!
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:25 PM
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I would elope if i were to do it oever
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:25 PM
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I had a wedding without a ceremony We got married in Hawaii on the beach. It was only 2 of us and our then 3 year old daughter. Few months later we had a small receptions for family and friends.
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:27 PM
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Yep, one of my best friends got married last summer and they only had their closest family with them in church. The they had a party in the evening where they celebrated with friends, family and relatives. They videotaped the ceremony though and had it playing on a screen during dinner, and we could see the ceremony, without sound on, while eating and chatting. It was loads of fun!
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:30 PM
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When Jeff & I got married, it was just us, his parents, the minister, and the photographer. It was AMAZING. We'd wanted to have a reception at a later date, but that never happened. I wouldn't change a thing. I thought I'd regret not having all of our friends and family there, but it was so perfect and intimate. I highly recommend it.
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:33 PM
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I went to a wedding where the ceremony literally took 5 minutes. The poor minister was so soft and the wedding was outdoors and no one could hear anything anyway. It was definitely more of a "the ceremony is a formality" wedding and then it was on to the party. It was an outdoor fall reception... everyone watched the ceremony from the tables, and then after the ceremony the party started immediately.
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:35 PM
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I haven't but I've been to a wedding where the ceremony was so quick that us guests barely had time to sit down and the I-Do's were over.

I don't see any issue with only inviting guests to a reception. The actual ceremony is for you...if you want an intimate ceremony with only a few people I say go for it.
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:37 PM
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We got married in a big, formal wedding with a reception in Missouri (where I'm from and where my family was), then we had another reception back in Arizona. A lot of people couldn't go to our wedding so came to the AZ reception. I think it's pretty common.

If I had to do it over though, I would run far-far away and get married privately. (lots of in-law problems at my wedding that pretty much ruined it for me)
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:41 PM
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we got married at city hall with just my SIL as a witness and a friend there to snap a few photos. then, we had a 2 night party in TX with about 80 people (sort of a "meet the families") a few months later and then a 3 night destination party at club med in FL with about 75 people. i loved it and would definitely do it again!

my BIL loved it so much that he and his wife did the same thing about a year later. they did a quick vow renewal at the club med though ... (very short, no bridesmaids or anything, on the beach ... )
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:41 PM
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DH's cousin did... They eloped and then had a party later. The traditionalist of the family didn't like it because they had bent nose in that they still had to bring a gift but wasn't good enough to see them get married. I didn't have a problem with it...
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:45 PM
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We got married with just immediate family and friends, then had a luncheon, then that night had a big reception for everyone.
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:52 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lauren grier View Post
only the reception? How did that go over? Personally....... out of all the weddings I've been in or to.. i really loathed that ceremony part. It's long and boring and dreadful. I especially hated being a bridesmaid because while, obviously, i was not THE center of attention.. I was up there and it was so painfully uncomfortable for me. Especially walking down the aisle thing first guh.

I think a reception only wedding sounds brilliant. No stuffy boring part, the bride and groom get to declare their love for each other in private and then everyone can celebrate together afterwards and feel included that way.
So.... why are you asking???

My wedding ceremony and reception was in the same church. Our ceremony was like 10 minutes long and that is only because the pianist played the extended version of the song when we lit the unity candle. LOL Then we all walked across the hall and had the reception.
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Old 02-04-2014, 02:57 PM
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just curious.. i've had to go to/be in several weddings the past year. I'm hopeful my friends and family's wedding seasons are over.. but if not, I'm totally suggesting a no ceremony affair lol My brothers was probably the shortest of the ceremonies, but it still would have been better if it was just the reception. Granted that marriage didn't last, so there's always the possibility he decides to try again soon
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Old 02-04-2014, 03:10 PM
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That's pretty much how Mormon temple weddings are. The ceremony itself is small with only close family and a few close friends - the rooms just don't accommodate a ton of people - I think 40 is about as big as they get. Then there's usually a luncheon that includes a little bit larger group, but still relatively intimate. And, then the reception is the time when everyone you've ever known can stop by and offer congratulations. I think it's a pretty nice way to go.
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Old 02-04-2014, 03:27 PM
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Our wedding was very short with only close friends and family, with a small luncheon afterward. Later in the evening was a large reception for all family and friends. Kids were not invited to the ceremony, so a few family members were bent and didn't show up, making it even smaller than we planned. I loved how it all worked out.
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Old 02-04-2014, 03:27 PM
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40 is like.. the most amount i'd want at the reception.. so that doesn't even seem that small to me haha.. I think maybe I just don't like people. LOL I think ideally is like how a few mentioned, bride, groom, officiant, witnesses. done. then the reception invite as many as you want I guess
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Old 02-04-2014, 03:45 PM
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I've been to a few. It's especially common when people have destination weddings, but still want to celebrate with a local reception.
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Old 02-04-2014, 03:51 PM
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I had two receptions, cake reception w/everyone and then a smaller reception w/ just family and the wedding party... I totally loved it that way... our ceremony was short and very light-hearted... I was totally giggling the whole time... but had some run-ins with MIL... so if I were to do it over again, I think I would have preferred to elope and then have the two receptions
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Old 02-04-2014, 04:09 PM
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Quote:
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That's pretty much how Mormon temple weddings are. The ceremony itself is small with only close family and a few close friends - the rooms just don't accommodate a ton of people - I think 40 is about as big as they get. Then there's usually a luncheon that includes a little bit larger group, but still relatively intimate. And, then the reception is the time when everyone you've ever known can stop by and offer congratulations. I think it's a pretty nice way to go.
That was ours, all immediate family (adults) plus one friend who wouldn't be able to make it to the reception.

I also took all of the formalities out of the reception. I hate all of the watching people dance, and cutting the cake, and throwing the bouquet when I go to weddings, so I didn't put anyone who attended my wedding through that. We just got to meet with friends and family and have a good time.
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Old 02-04-2014, 04:23 PM
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My brother did this for family that couldn't attend the wedding (he lives in Virginia and pretty much all of his family lives in Washington state). So after the wedding (which was huge - but had mostly his wife's family there) they came to Washington and we had a full on reception for everyone there. It was awesome and people really appreciated being able to celebrate his marriage, even if they couldn't go to the wedding.
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Old 02-04-2014, 04:31 PM
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we eloped [Vegas, Baby] and it was Awe-Some.
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Old 02-04-2014, 04:57 PM
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When I got married years ago, my wedding was family only, with friends being invited to the reception... it seemed like the best of both worlds!

I will say that a few people were hurt that they didn't get an invite to the wedding, but when we explained it was family only, it smoothed over a lot of the hurt feelings. While I had initially planned that it would be our parents and sibling (each of us had one close sibling), we later decided that grandparents and other close family could attend (I had a dying aunt who knew she wouldn't live to see her own grandchildren get married; she and I were VERY close, and she was like an extra grandparent to me, so of course, I invited her, and by inviting her, invited my grandmother's other sisters, too). He chose not to invite other family, but was okay that I chose to invite them-- after all, we had the whole church, so we may as well use it, and they were people who WANTED to see those vows exchanged. My other brother flew in from Germany as a surprise-- he greeted me at the church! So... it did end up being more than immediate family.

The reception was larger-- but again, he chose not to invite anyone but his parents and brother, who all left early. My family and friends wanted a celebration, and we had an intimate gathering with cupcakes and desserts, dancing, and all of the usual reception ceremonials.

After the few who were hurt got over their initial "ouch" of not being invited, they all realized that what we did was a great way to do it-- all of the fun, none of the boring stuff.

If I get married again, I'd like to do something similar-- perhaps a destination wedding with a reception when we return-- but of course, if he wants to invite more people, I'm open to it.

We had less than 50 people at our reception at any given time, but I think a total of like... 60 showed up? Mostly they were +1s of people I had invited (my roommate came, and of course, her boyfriend joined by default, for example).
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Old 02-04-2014, 05:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by glumirk View Post
I also took all of the formalities out of the reception. I hate all of the watching people dance, and cutting the cake, and throwing the bouquet when I go to weddings, so I didn't put anyone who attended my wedding through that. We just got to meet with friends and family and have a good time.
We didn't do any of those things either. In fact, we didn't even have a cake. But, we had a TON of people at our reception, so it was just fun to talk to everyone and celebrate together.
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Old 02-04-2014, 05:30 PM
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Yep I've been to a few. half of my siblings got married in a Mormon Temple so we just went to the reception afterwards. no big deal to us at all We had a very short ceremony for ours and it then a reception afterwards.
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Old 02-04-2014, 07:07 PM
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I did a real wedding, but it was outdoors and I wrote the entire thing so it took about 20 minutes. Then we did a big reception.
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Old 02-04-2014, 07:15 PM
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have I missed a big announcement?
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Old 02-04-2014, 08:04 PM
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haha...
no
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Old 02-04-2014, 08:30 PM
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If my kids' dad and I ever do actually get married, we will be having a sort of quaker type wedding. A circle of chairs for just the few closest family and friends, we walk in, no minister, do a quick vows exchange and then on to the party. I would want to have a barn or outside rustic (maybe in a big white tent) type wedding, so no church formalities at all I say, it's your wedding, do it the way you want for sure!
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Old 02-04-2014, 09:20 PM
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The best wedding I went to was outdoors. We all had wine in our hands and stood for the ceremony. The ceremony was about 10 minutes and totally sweet. Then they had a big tent for dinner (which the bride and her family prepared that day). We ate, drank, drank some more, had a bonfire, drank a little more. It was a great wedding!!
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Old 02-05-2014, 12:33 PM
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in germany it's quite common to have a small and intimate ceremony and a big(ger) reception afterwards.
also lots of people don't marry in church anymore. for a marriage being "official" only the showing up before the civil registry office counts. and this might be the couple only, if they want to.
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Old 02-05-2014, 12:57 PM
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WHY IS NOBODY YELLING ABOUT THIS??

IF THIS BOY MAKES YOU HAPPY ENOUGH THAT YOU ARE EVEN THINKING ABOUT GETTING MARRIED,
DO
IT
NOW!

He really does sound like a keeper. And an intimate ceremony with a fun party later sounds like the way to go.

We had a ridiculously expensive wedding ceremony & reception, and now I think, OMGOSH, what a HUGE waste of money! You're right, the ceremonies are boring, and nobody really listens to the preacher anyway.
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