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  #1  
Old 10-24-2008, 01:45 PM
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Default Dealing with the neighborhood witch

I need help being snarky given that's not my normal nature.

Last year, I was in charge of a neighborhood Halloween event and due to the general nastiness of one family, I declined to do it again this year. (I paid for most of the event out of my own pocket and they made snide comments the whole time and I went home feeling down and angry. Some remarks included "I can't believe you gave my kid candy" and general unhappiness with the goody bag and food choices of which there were about 10, some healthy, and almost all paid for by me.)

Unfortunately, a friend of mine has gotten roped into the event this year. I've agreed to help her partly because I know how much work it is and how unappreciated she will likely be.

This year, I've decided not to put up the snideness. I smiled and looked the other way last year but I'm unwilling to have my friend have to do this.

So, basically I need some good comebacks for the likely barrage of snarky remarks. Witty would be best. (I have to watch my language in front of the little ones.)

BTW, when trick or treating last year, my son told this woman thank you for his candy and she looked at me and said "well, at least he's polite." Umm, thanks. Witch!
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Old 10-24-2008, 01:50 PM
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OMGosh!! I would totally tell that woman that while she has the choice in what is consumed by her son the goody bag is a gift and she cannot choose what goes in it if she did pay for it. Then tell her I am sorry she does not care for my choices and is free to give it to another child if she wants to. Then leave it at that. That is sooo RUDE!! And when she said well at least he has manners I would have probably said something like "thank you, he gets that from his parents"
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Old 10-24-2008, 01:52 PM
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omg. i wanna smack that woman and i don't even know her, lol
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Old 10-24-2008, 02:12 PM
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I use "You really felt that was ok to say?" on my MIL.

I mean - sure I want to punch her in the throat, but then that would cause some stress for my DH.

I've also used "Wow! Somebody has their grouchy pants on today!"

Grr @ the annoying lady. Sorry that she's like that. Ruins the fun you so generously provided for everyone else.
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Old 10-24-2008, 02:22 PM
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she looked at me and said "well, at least he's polite."

Proper response is : "Yes, unlike you."
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Old 10-24-2008, 02:24 PM
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No proper response would have been "Oh, I'm surprised you know what that is" (politeness)
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Old 10-24-2008, 02:24 PM
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LOL thats perfect!!


Quote:
Originally Posted by Stacey42 View Post
she looked at me and said "well, at least he's polite."

Proper response is : "Yes, unlike you."
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:07 PM
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Here's one:

Just because it's Halloween, doesn't mean you have to behave like a witch.
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:09 PM
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LOL, you guys are too funny!
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:12 PM
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just so you know, halloween costumes aren't meant to be worn year round, you might want to look into buying some non-witch clothes, it might help!
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:13 PM
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Oh, did I mention I saw the coolest costume the other day? I was going to buy it but then I realized I NEVER want to be you, not even one day a year!
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:14 PM
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What a witch! Umm, but with a B. Didn't want to type that out and get in trouble.

Ok, so you gave her kid candy. It's a freaking Halloween event. Seriously, I would put some carrots in a baggie and hand them to her and say "Especially made for you".

Does she even allow her kid to go trick or treating? Does she make that comment to every person while trick or treating?

Gosh, I want to smack her.
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:14 PM
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bring her some "Miss Manners" or "How To: Remove that Unsightly Stick From Your Ass" Pamphlets
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:16 PM
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When complaining about the food:

"Oh did you chip in? I think my mom taught me that beggars can't be choosers, you're more than welcome to get on your broom, fly back to your house and go eat some poison apples!"
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:16 PM
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dude, snark is my second nature, sad sad
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:20 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Traci Reed View Post
Oh, did I mention I saw the coolest costume the other day? I was going to buy it but then I realized I NEVER want to be you, not even one day a year!
Ha, love it!!!!
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:27 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Traci Reed View Post
bring her some "Miss Manners" or "How To: Remove that Unsightly Stick From Your Ass" Pamphlets
bwahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I need me some of those pamphlets to pass out.
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:49 PM
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I'm so sorry you got treated that way. But I have met plenty of those people who just want to complain, it makes them happy or something. I don't have any snarky replies (something about a jerk store comes to mind...).

But can I just say, that I hope I never do anything to P**S Traci off

-Diana
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Old 10-24-2008, 03:57 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Winter Ivy View Post
But can I just say, that I hope I never do anything to P**S Traci off

-Diana
*snicker* my bad, I got carried away! I DID stop though so that's got some points...
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  #20  
Old 10-24-2008, 05:01 PM
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LOL, I agree, I never want to be on Traci's bad side!

I like the Pamphlet one!
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Old 10-24-2008, 05:11 PM
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I am so sorry you had to put up with that last year!!! The nerve of some people to be outright rude! When people at our school complain or make petty comments, I try to address them head on... as sweetly as I possibly can with something like, "Oh, I know... I always have trouble with pulling that together but we didn't get many volunteers this year. Can we put you down for coordinating 'goodie bags' next year?" That shuts them up pretty fast and they are always so surprised. The look on their faces when actually asked to DO something instead of taking and then complaining, usually is good for a couple of laughs later on amongst those of us who are actually DOING the work!!!

Good luck this year. You just can't teach some people to have class, or be polite....

Oh, and here's another tactic that really gets THOSE types! Be super, super nice to their kids. Their kids will invariable say soomething like, "I really like so-and-so's mom, she is sooo nice". It kills them! It is like a stealth bomb that can hit them at any time!
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Old 10-24-2008, 05:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Traci Reed View Post
just so you know, halloween costumes aren't meant to be worn year round, you might want to look into buying some non-witch clothes, it might help!
ROFL that one has to be a fave by far---
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Old 10-24-2008, 05:14 PM
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my grandparents always used to tell me

"i just dont see how you stand it"

SOO we use it all the time around here when people are rude or ugly i just always say as sweet as possible "you poor thing i just dont see how you stand it!" )
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Old 10-24-2008, 10:47 PM
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"I can't believe you gave my kid candy" ... "Oh! I'm sorry! Oh wait, did I come to Your party instead of my own by mistake? Wow, you must have worked so hard! This party is excellent and just like what I'd have spent hours working on!"
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