Neighbors

[maryinaz]

What kind of neighbors do you have? Are they helpful and friendly?

This morning we were all cutting up our tree that the dust storm knocked down last week and it occurred to me that if we lived in my sister's neighborhood back in Joplin, all the neighbors would have been out there helping. We don't live in that kind of neighborhood. Even though we have been here for years, everyone on our street is very standoff-ish.

I have lots of friends in my neighborhood, but they don't live on our street. But they wouldn't offer to help either. I'm not saying that WE help and they don't, we just don't ask each other to help with stuff like that.

Made me kind of sad.

[rach3975]

Makes me sad, too. Our neighbors are all kinda distant, and I'm not outgoing enough to really help change that. There have been 2 times when everyone on the street was stuck here during a storm--once when a tree fell across the road and once when we got 30 inches of snow (double our yearly average) and it took almost a week for plows to get to us. Both those times, the neighbors came together and everyone helped move the tree and shovel the snow. But those were situations when we were all affected. It wouldn't be a neighborhood thing if 1 family had storm damage. We're friendly with 1 family because our kids play together, but other than that we all just wave and have brief conversations if we happen to see each other outside.

[tanyiadeskins]

about the same here... but I think I would take that over nosy neighbors that want to be in my business all the time lol. I can only take people in small doses ... well except for family lol

[glumirk]

I loved my friends in AZ, but not the people in general. Our neighbors here are pretty good, but I feel like a lot of it is started by us. DH is really friendly, and it's opened up potential good friendships. I miss the college days where I knew half of my neighbors anyway and we could just invite people over to help us eat whatever dessert we knew was too much for the 2 of us.

[Traci Reed]

This is what I posted on Facebook last night about our lovely neighbor:

Holy crap, if it's not one thing, it's another...we get rid of the crazy landlord and now our upstairs neighbor is insane!

Apparently Patrick smokes crack (because he's up all night...hello he works nights!) and "sneaks out" at night...um yeah he's going to work.

Also, our back patio is full of trash that reeks. Um no, unless you mean the bikes back there. Otherwise we sit out there all the time so we must be oblivious to the garbage and stench.

She came to our door screaming because we parked in the uncovered parking spot (which is a free for all) to unload our groceries, and she's telling me where I can and can't take my dog to the bathroom (the only rule is that we clean up after her.)

Apparently I'm oblivious to Patrick's crack-smoking, sneaking out ways as well according to her. Awesome.

Um. Yeah.

[MamaBee]

I grew up in on a street where you knew everyone and we helped each other out - but that was small town.

Where I live now - i don't really know our neighbors... I know the family across the street - they listen to my FIL's radio show... and we know the family to our right.... and that is it. Most people on our street think we are the people that built our house and have a feud going on with the family on the right (the builders surveyed the land wrong and put the house onto the lot of the family on the right...). I'm a very shy person, so it doesn't bother me not to know many people - but if something happened - I know I could at least have those that I do know watch J for me... and the family across the street have told their girls that if they need something and they arent' home to come to me...

[rach3975]

My neighbors are starting to look a lot better!

[lovely1m]

I live in an apartment, I talk to the ones nearest me, but just to complain about the building. The rest all come and go and lots of weird people here anyway. I have always hoped to live in a neighborhood were I know everyone and can always go to them for help, but since I am severly shy IRL, I am doubting that will happen.

[Kara]

I grew up in a neighborhood where all the kids ran around together and everyone knew each other really well. I've always wanted that for my kids but our neighborhood is mostly older couples whose kids are grown. We make small talk with a few neighbors but for the most part, there's not much of a sense of community at all.

[marlathrall]

Haha- I have no neighbors. Living in the country totally has its advantages.

[catgoddess]

We have a couple of nice neighbors, but mostly they're nothing but noisy trash. lol I feel like such a snoot for saying that, but I'm not sure what else to call neighbors who cook weed all day and blast their music all night. We awake to constant yelling outside and people pounding on doors at 3am drunk or stoned or both - not to mention the steady supply of broken beer bottles on the sidewalks and lawns.

All this and they had the nerve to complain about my bird feeder last year and the association told me I had to remove it. But sure, it's OK to cook weed all day and set the smoke alarms off and party all night long as long as you don't have a bird feeder outside.

You'd think we lived in a crack house, but no, we pay a lot for this lovely neighborhood in a gated community. lol

[LJSDesigns]

I know my neighbors well enough to nod or wave at and I'm okay with it. I know their children better cause they follow me around when I am working in the yard and ask me a ton of questions until I run out of answers and patience and send them home.

[terrab]

We've lived here for 4 years now and barely know our neighbours. It makes me kinda sad and I've tried to be friendly at the playground but it seems like no one is very friendly around here. It is so bad that the lady next door didn't even recognize me. She was registering people in my neighbourhood for voting and I needed to add my name to the voters list. She looked at me, asked for my address (which I thought was a little strange since we live right next door to each other) and when I gave her my address she gave me a really funny look like "hey that address sounds familiar.?!" I finally said "Yeah, I'm your neighbour" and I guess she felt pretty awful. Since then she has been a little friendlier to me when we see each other on the street, but I would really love to live in a neighbourhood where everyone knows each other and helps each other out.

[Lyd]

I have to say, we have great neighbors. We live in a cul-de-sac, and all of our neighbors are wonderful. The guy right across the street from us had a heart attack a few years ago, and while he was recovering, all the neighbors made sure that their snow got shoveled, their garbage cans made it out to the street, etc. In fact, everyone is always very helpful with snow removal in general. If someone is out taking care of their own driveway/sidewalk, it's pretty common that they'll continue around the circle and clear everyone's sidewalk. When we had our crazy year last year, we had lots of offers for help. My one neighbor even drove Sean to and from school for a few weeks when my thryoid was causing me trouble and Ian was first getting sick. Our next door neighbor, whose kids are all grown and out of the house, is always so awesome with my kids. Sean loves to go out and question him about whatever projects he's working on, and he's always very kind to him. And, he brings us cucumbers from his garden.

The only complaint I have about our neighbors is that there aren't many kids the same ages as my kids. There are a bazillion kids in our larger neighborhood, but in our circle there are only two, and they are a couple years older than mine. But, overall, that's a small price to pay for having really fabulous neighbors. And, the teenagers who are in our circle are friendly, respectful, nice kids. I'm grateful for that too.

[nun69]

we have pretty great neighbors too...we have been here 2 years and this year is the 1st year that everyone has really been out and chatting...Abby is the neighborhood social butterfly and even knows the neighbors with NO kids All the kids play together, we watch out for each other's houses and we even all know the enighborhood pets so if one gets out, we know where it belongs Just a few days ago my DD's boyfreind's muffler fell off and a neighbor from up the street (roughly his age) came to help and my neighbor 2 doors down welded it back on...now that is some good neighbors And I feel like we are in a nieghborhood where "it takes a village to raise a child" kind of place and that makes me very very happy. The only other time I had neighbors like this was when I lived in base housing in Sicily.

[SeattleSheri]

We just came from a BBQ at our next door neighbor's house and they are great! We moved here about a month ago and we've met several of our neighbors. Earlier this week there was an ice cream social at the local park and there were at least 100 families there ... and we just had another neighbor come by earlier today to give us a flier for a block party in about 2 weeks. In our old neighborhood that is only a couple of miles away, it was a totally different story. It took us years to meet our neighbors and there were very few families.

[Trista]

Oh this makes my heart hurt to read... only b/c in my case we left the perfect house with the best neighbors/friends.
We lived on a circle street and knew everyone from one end of the block to the other. We were all so close that we shared house keys, looked out for each others kids, had bbq's, birthdays, block parties. we even had american idol, survivor, and superbowl watch parties. another great thing about our street was being pregnant with both of my kids at the same time as some of my friends. Lots of close by playdates. Oh do I ever miss it all!

[FireWolf]

We moved into a small village where almost everyone is related to everyone else.The brother of the previous owners of our house lives right next door. We've lived here for 10 years and only know our neighbors well enough to say hi and wave, but honestly, I like it that way! Too bad it doesn't stop everyone from being nosy and spreading rumors anyway.

[mariewilcox]

I live in a pretty rural town so I don't have any "close" neighbors that actually leave less than a 1/2 mile from me, but I do have several good friends who are in a mild radius and we all get together for sports events, school events (we all have kids the same age), help each other out etc.

It's kind of the best of both worlds - not close enough to be falling over each other but close enough to get help with moving the air conditioner, shoveling the 2 feet of snow, downed trees, etc.

We also cook for each other when someone is ill, etc. One of our families the husband had knee surgery and her youngest son broke his femur the day before and she was going nuts, so we all made a dish for her to freeze for dinner that week .... things like that

[LeeAndra]

We live in a neighborhood with all rented duplexes, so it's an incredibly transient neighborhood where the kids all play together just because they're all outside all the time, but the adults don't talk to or know each other. DH was friendly with the family that lived in the other part of our duplex, but they moved in May and no one else has moved in yet. He knows a few of the other neighbors by sight/name. I don't know anyone. It's mostly upper elementary and middle school-aged kids, so there's no one to play with Monkey, either.

Since we'll be moving (again -- sigh) next year, it doesn't bother me.

[Lizzy257]

We've been here 5 years, and don't really know our neighbours. We're the last of 7 houses on our street, and I think I'd know people from 3 of the houses enough to nod or say hello to, and would know the people right next door to us enough to have a quick chat with. My kids play with the little girl next door sometimes (although she doesn't speak a word of English!!). The kids will just play with any neighbour kids they see around, they don't mind! And I'm ok with things the way they are, because they're not bad neighbours.

[Stacey42]

I grew up in a close knit suburban neighborhood. everybody knew everybody & parented one another's children so not only did you get a dressing down from Mrs Smith for doing something wrong/stupid/dangerous in her line of sight but then she called your parents so you got another one when you got home. As a child I hated it but as a parent I really really wish I had that sort of neighborhood now.

Now i live in a rural area. Farms all around me so my nearest neighbor is a quarter mile away. Apart from the people in the few houses around the church a mile up the road, I never see my neighbors.

And they only stop by to try & convert the heathen.

[Tamie]

I also grew up in a close knit suburban neighborhood, but I now live on the edge of Detroit in a small mobile home park and I get new neighbors every 6mts, and they all suck!!!
When we moved in this park there was lots of retiries, they all died now its all drunks and junkies. We are moving in the fall, we finally getting a house. I'm so excited I could $hit sometimes...LOL

[mummytothree]

well we have only lived in our house here for 6 years and everyone around us has lived her since like they were all married...35 - 40 years ago. We are the youngest on our cul de sac and only oen other person has kids.....a girl in college and a boy who will be a Jr. But I've never seen the man and the woman has never once acknowledge me in 6 years no matter how many times I've waved or said "Hi"!!

Everyone else is older with their kids being our age, but they are nice...the smile and wave and say Hello when they pass (We live in the very first house on the cul de sac). Our neighbors right to our right is a nice lady who always has a nice word for us, if we see each other out we talk.

But I'm not a social person, I just don't out myself out there so all the blame isn't the other peoples fault. I can assume that if we ever need any help that I'm sure I could ask the neighbor to our right and she (and her boyfriend also a neighbor) would most definitely offer help!!!

[ashersmommy]

We live in kind of a rural area but there is a small stretch of us in this area. My husband is great about socializing but I'm a little standoffish when it comes to meeting new people (don't ask me why but it's always hard for me). Although we aren't really close friends with our neighbors, we do get along and consult each other on things that could effect the others like having a party late or putting up a fence. I grew up in a few different types of places growing up and we had everything from bad neighbors to neighbors that were too friendly so I'm happy with what we have now. Although I wish we had some neighbors that I was closer in age to and had *nice* kids the same age as ours to play with.

[NeverendingJen]

I literally don't know any of my neighbors for more than a wave hello kind of thing. I doubt I'd recognize them at the grocery store. It makes me sad.

I grew up in the kind of neighborhood where we all did stuff together- we had monthly block parties year round, indoors and out. I miss that era.

[kscwgirl]

When I grew up we knew everyone on our block, we all played together, we had block parties... but now, I don't know anyone. When we move, I know the family next door b/c they've lived there since my grandparents lived there... but I don't know anyone else.

[Sherri Tierney]

We have good neighbors. I love our area in general but it does lack in the socialization department. When we first moved in there was a trailer park across the street. It was pretty bad. There was constantly really loud music and always a lot of commotion, screaming, doors banging, etc. Pretty much every weekend the cops would show up. About once or twice a month we'd have helicopters with search lights checking out the trailer park. There were two big negatives when it came to buying this house... the trailer park and the ammunition plant as they tested bombs every few days and the explosions would rattle the windows/doors.

About a year after we moved in the ammunition plant closed down and the neighbors next door who own the trailer park closed it up. Now there is just a nice big vacant lot across the street and we have a nice view to a field of corn. In one direction we have neighbors who lived in the house back when my mom was little and my grandma was raising her kids in this neighborhood (they lived just down the street from here back then). This couple is in their late 80's and early 90's and their kids are scattered all around. There is an empty lot between us as well as a privacy fence so we don't really see a lot of them. Our street curves and their house is around the curve so it faces a different way than ours does. They are nice though and friendly when we see them. I'm sure they would do anything for us that we asked, provided they could. They are always quick to buy cookies from my Girl Scout and talk to the kids when they are walking around the block. Every 6 weeks their granddaughter and great grandson come to visit and my kids spend the day at their house playing with the great grandson who is right in between mine in age. They send us cookies and stuff from their garden and had us come pick strawberries a few summers back. On the other side there is another empty lot and then another house. The back of this neighbor's house faces the side of our house. We're the only ones on this part of the street who actually face the street. Anyway, those neighbors are awesome too. They recently moved but are still around a lot taking care of their grass and flowers at their old place. They don't want to sell it for some reason so they are just holding on to two houses. They've been in the neighborhood since shortly after it was built and right after they got married. They've been married 50 years... They are great people who come out to talk to us if we are in the yard and smile and wave when we see them somewhere. The guy fixed a chain saw for my husband and the lady brought me some bulbs she had thinned out of her flower beds. They are super sweet and gave my kids free run of the lot between us that they own. Our back yard neighbor is someone we've known for years. We worked with him a long time ago and he and I share an aunt. We aren't directly related but he definitely treats us like family. We don't see much of him and even less of his wife but if we needed something I think they'd be there for us. He works at our mechanic's shop now and when the van was on the fritz he drove it up to the shop for us so that my husband didn't have to take it and try to find a ride home. He's done all sorts of little things like that for us. Basically, we have awesome neighbors but we have nothing in common with them so there isn't a big social aspect. The youngest of the neighbors are the ones behind us and they are my mom's age at least... maybe a little older. We're the 'young 'uns' of the bunch. LOL We've been told the people who lived here previously were 'weird' so the neighbors didn't have much to do with them. I guess we're not weird.

We moved here from an awesome neighborhood... the kind I hoped to spend the rest of my life in. That neighborhood has changed so much though that it wouldn't be the same even if we did still live there. We had fabulous neighbors who were all really close and every evening you would see everyone walking up and down the street visiting with one another. 'Granny Pat' lived next door to us and she kind of held the neighborhood together. We lost her a few years back to cancer and things haven't been the same around there since.

[jessica31876]

we have a mixture of neighbors. Some I could do without and some are helpful and nice. My husband is one who will go out of the way to help our neighbors though. Then we have the nosy neighbors who would not lift a finger to help but have no problem calling 911 when we are arguing which is really really rare here. I dont talk to her (and yes I absolutely without a doubt know who it is). Im not rude to her if she waves I will too but I do not go out of the way to talk or have her over for coffee LOL. And when I moved here I was one of those who tried really hard and made cakes and homemade breads and coffee cakes and stuff to share with neighbors. I think for the most part it seems people everywhere now kinda stay to themselves.

[maryinaz]

I enjoyed reading everyone's stories! Sounds like The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly and lots of different experiences.

[Kjersti]

I just had a neighbor move in with THREE daughter's and she's a dream. I'm so happy!!!! Our kids are best friends. She and her DH are only renting while they find a house so it won't last long....sniffles!!!!