wwyd: school related

[marnel]

If you read my post last school year regarding my son being bullied this has to do with that same teacher.
I have never had to take any action against any teacher and I know they put up with alot from all the children they encounter on a daily basis.
I am seriously at a loss with 3 days into class. I'm so p/o apparently my son was upset today with this teacher because he was commenting on his skills in gym, my son got tired of it and was being sarcastic in response and the other gym teacher stepped in and told my son enough and advised him he'd have a zero for today's class.
I honestly wouldn' leave it alone but my ds told me today that on the last day of school last year this teacher approached him and said to him if he wasn't such a '"bad kid" he would have helped him more during that school year. Say, what? This made me cringe and brought me back to that whole gym situation. Did he do enough, is that what he's referring to?
My ds said he didn't really see the point of mentioning it b/c the school year was over and he was like whateva, you crazy! With what happened today he feels like this teacher has a chip on his shoulder and is acting on it, I was like woaaa what?
So that brings me to that wwyd moment. Lay it on me I'm going to bed to think more and i'll be back in the am .

[jacinda]

Oh I'd be demanding a meeting with the teacher AND the principal for sure. That is NOT acceptable at all. I am fuming that someone is abusing their position of authority like that.

[nun69]

I 2nd what Jacinda said.....I would be all up in that school!!!!!!!!

[mariewilcox]

Yep, I'd be there with Jacinda and Angie. Not acceptable at all.

[jacinda]

This has been on my mind all evening. For a teacher to make comments about a child's gym skills to the point where the child feels he has to speak back, well that just screams bullying to me. Not all kids are athletes, and to make a child feel bad in front of others is absolutely unforgiveable. How dare a teacher pick on a child like that, and to say those other things, well....I would hate to be in your child's shoes knowing every day I'd be going to a school where a teacher treats me like that.

If I were in your shoes, I'd totally go all Mama Bear over this. Can your son be transferred to another class? I'd hate for him to be subject to this all year.

[disneyaddict]

I would definitely meet with the principal and then request a meeting with the principal and teacher together. I agree with absolutely everything Jacinda said. Teachers have to realize that they absolutely cannot bully children. If it is against the law for students to bully one another, it is definitely against professional standards for teachers to do the same.

I would also argue that one of the purposes of gym is to promote a lifelong "love" and commitment to physical activity. When children are discouraged in gym and made to feel as if they cannot do anything, it will affect their development of healthy lifestyles. Thus, the teacher's attitude is totally at odds with the purpose of gym.

[tanyiadeskins]

ummm...yea...totally a meeting with EVERYONE and document everything

[Beebo]

I agree with everything said here. A meeting asap with the school principal, teacher and everyone else who is involved! No teacher has the right to bully any child!

[jk703]

Not acceptable.

Meet. Discuss. Document. Get it all in writing - demand it from the school, and wait for the documentation - then and there.



Hugs. It hurts when your kids go through these things. Makes me sad that he has to go through this.

[thompsonc2007]

Agreed! I would would definitely request a meeting with all parties involved! For a teacher to be involved it escalates the situation in my opinion. He is setting a culture of bullying...what an example! And then we wonder why so many kids bully. So sorry you have to deal with this...but also very glad your son confided in you.

[marnel]

Thanks to all of you for the advice.
I lost sleep over this and I woke up early to send a very nice email to the principal and asst principal re my conerns.
I stressed that I dont want my son to become a target and I respect everyone and only ask for the same thing for my son. I did hilite on how saddened I am by this teachers actions and want it looked into taken care of right away.
I advised my son of what I did in case they call him to the office. I told him to be honest and to speak openly as he did with me.
Ive worked so hard with him, his depression/anger has gotten better he used to bottle up and then explode but now hes different thanks to therapy. I want him to feel happy snd excited about school. Not down and intimidated.
He was feeling good when one of the bullies from last year has moved and the other one came up to him and asked for forgiveness for being mean after he said he was really sorry. I told him that took alot from him to do that what did u say? He said it all good and they walked away.
Thanks to all of you I had to be sure I was doing the right thing and already had my mama bear claws out but this helped me think rationally Your all the best.

[DawnMarch]

I think you did great in remaining calm while still advocating for your son. It's such a tough situation and I know most of us would be tempted to jump in there and start swingin' (metaphorically, of course!). If it were me, I would ask for a conference with the teacher (probably without my son) to talk through your concerns. You KNOW your son's heart and his challenges, but the teacher may not and you may be able to help the teacher be more understanding, and also understand where the teacher is coming from.

[thompsonc2007]

Good for you! It sounds like you did a great job handling the situation. It is so hard to keep a cool head when it comes to our little ones. But I guess we grow more and more just as they do I hope this puts an end to this situation and paves the way for a great school year for your son!

[jk703]

I agree, calming down was a better start than to go out with the claws out. I would still want to meet up with everyone involved and get it all out in the open, and documented. It's hard on kids, but great to hear that he is handling it as best as he can...and that he has you in his corner to rely on. Hugs.

[dana]

just want to say (((hugs)) mary!

[marnel]

Originally Posted by thompsonc2007

Good for you! It sounds like you did a great job handling the situation. It is so hard to keep a cool head when it comes to our little ones. But I guess we grow more and more just as they do I hope this puts an end to this situation and paves the way for a great school year for your son!

Casey, this is the truth, if this were 3 years ago I'd go running in not walking and screaming with knuckles up! I've grown and learned from my mistakes plus he'd be mortified if I acted that way, i'd be modeling the behavior I want him to get out of.

Dawn, Jenn that's in the works. I heard back from the principal and she's having the asst principal f-up with Gio and myself since he had a good relationship with him last year.
her last words: We will work together to resolve your concerns so that your son has a positive and productive middle school experience.
I hope so....

Dana, Thanks

[AmaG]

With regard ro your previous post: http://www.stopbullying.gov/laws/federal/index.html

There are laws that set protocols as to what schools are legally bound to do in order to 1. stop bullying and 2. prevent and stop harassment of any kind, including that which involves teachers. I am a high school teacher and I am appalled by your story. This teacher is waaaay out of line.Our state has a DASA law (Dignity for All Students Act). I would be in serious trouble if I behaved the way that teacher did. Good luck and keep us updated.