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Old 06-08-2015, 05:40 PM
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Default Wedding question!

I'm feeling like doing some random questions again so here is one.. if you could redo your wedding would you?

for me personally I WOULD.. I'd make it much smaller and intimate.. I'd love to have it done sorta rustic which I know is way too popular right now but I just love the twinkle lights in the woods!
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Old 06-08-2015, 05:45 PM
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Me! I would go to an island, just hubby and I. Do the wedding and honeymoon in one go. Then when we're back have a bunch of dinner parties and welcome friends and family to our home to celebrate.

Since I didn't do that the first time around that's what I want to do for our 20th anniversary -- a vow renewal / vacation somewhere tropical.
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Old 06-08-2015, 05:51 PM
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Me! I would go to an island, just hubby and I. Do the wedding and honeymoon in one go. Then when we're back have a bunch of dinner parties and welcome friends and family to our home to celebrate.

Since I didn't do that the first time around that's what I want to do for our 20th anniversary -- a vow renewal / vacation somewhere tropical.
That sounds wonderful too! I wouldn't even care if we had anyone else there.. haha
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Old 06-08-2015, 05:51 PM
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We missed out on having a honeymoon one day!
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Old 06-08-2015, 05:57 PM
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I would change the time of day to earlier and get a REAL photographer!
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Old 06-08-2015, 06:11 PM
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I'd do like a rustic theme too, wear my hair down, and maybe short bridesmaid dresses. There are a few other smaller things I'd maybe change, but I was pretty happy with ours almost 12 years later.
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Old 06-08-2015, 06:12 PM
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YES! I was 8 1/2 months pregnant when we got married. We had already set a date and planned/paid for stuff when we found out we were pregnant so we didn't change a thing. We got married Memorial Day weekend. I was hot and miserable. I had to wear sandals because my fat, swollen feet wouldn't fit in anything else. I had cankles. I rented a dress that I would have never picked out. And, I couldn't drink with my guests...although they sure had a blast.
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Old 06-08-2015, 06:38 PM
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Yes! I would totally have a ceremony. We just went to the courthouse. But I would love to have a dress, and some family there. I agree that those twinkle lights in the woods sounds awesome, those are so romantic, I think! We didn't have a honeymoon either, so one of those would be nice someday
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Old 06-08-2015, 06:49 PM
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Yeah, I'd choose a better man...
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Old 06-08-2015, 06:49 PM
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Yeah, I'd choose a better man...
Come find a canadian boy..
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Old 06-08-2015, 06:59 PM
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Honestly, I wouldn't change a thing. Jeff & I got married almost 5 years ago, and since we had both been married before, we knew what we didn't want.

So, we did a small little ceremony (seriously only 6 people including us, the pastor, the photographer, and Jeff's parents) beside a weeping willow tree at the local botanical garden. Jeff made my bouquet for me, and the whole experience was just small and intimate on a beautiful autumn day. I couldn't have asked for anything more perfect.
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Old 06-08-2015, 07:05 PM
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but I just love the twinkle lights in the woods!
It must be the Northern Ontario side of me -- but every time I see weddings in the woods, with dinners set out under the trees and lanterns strung between the branches... my first thought is "how pretty" and my second thought is "there must be a ton of mosquitoes there!"
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Old 06-08-2015, 07:18 PM
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hahaha! apparently the mosquitos in northern ontario must be something else because people from here moved to northern ontario and all people kept saying was to get ready for the mosquitos..
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Old 06-08-2015, 07:19 PM
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My stepdaughter, Lori, (Adrienne's mommy) got married Saturday. There were a handful of guests. It was held in the woody backyard of her now b-i-l. The mosquitos ate me up! But it was beautiful. Adrienne was her maid of honor and her fiancé's son was best man.
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Old 06-08-2015, 07:46 PM
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I loved my big wedding…. But if I was to do it over, it would be close family on a beach… probably in Hawaii. The stress of getting ready just wasn't worth it.
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Old 06-08-2015, 08:15 PM
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Ours was just about us...
This is exactly what I missed! When we had our wedding we were so busy saying hello to different people and making sure they had a good time that we didn't really get to spend much time together!
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Old 06-08-2015, 08:18 PM
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I was always more interested in being married than in getting married. I suppose that if I was getting married now instead of 17 years ago there'd be things I would do differently. But if someone gave me the chance to go back in time and change or redo that wedding, I wouldn't. I do wish we'd had a better photographer and that I'd put my foot down when DH was anti-photo (which is why we have lots of photos but not a single photo I love of the 2 of us), but it was a nice day shared with family and friends, so good enough.
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Old 06-08-2015, 09:25 PM
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I've been married twice, and neither wedding (or quasieception) was what I would have chosen if I had had more time and more money. It's really one of those things that YOU as the bride remember and no one else remembers much of any of it after a couple years.

I love to plan and dance, so I'm going to 'make up' for both by throwing myself a huge 37th (my favorite number) bday party in a couple of years (2017). Lots of good food and good music and good friends -- I can't wait!

We never had a honeymoon, either (having a baby 4 months later tends to cramp that kind of thing), so we're going to go to Big Sur/Carmel for our 10th anniversary in 2019.

I gotta start saving my pennies now!!
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Old 06-08-2015, 09:30 PM
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That sounds like an awesome plan, LeeAndra....the birthday party and the trip! Big Sur and Carmel are both beautiful places!!
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Old 06-08-2015, 11:54 PM
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I wouldn't change a thing. We had a small wedding with 35 guests, and everything was exactly how we wanted it. We celebrated 15 years in April.
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Old 06-08-2015, 11:55 PM
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We had a big traditional wedding because we were young and didn't know better. If I were to do it again I would do something crazy like climb a mountain top with a few friends and do it there!
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Old 06-09-2015, 12:42 AM
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The only thing I would change about our wedding is that I would have had a wedding coordinator help me out instead of having to deal with all the little hickups myself. I would have splurged on an actual phtotgrapher, not my mum's photographer friend/guest in our wedding that never edited our pictures because she thinks I know how to do that (which I don't, yet). I would have splurged on an amazing honey moon right after the wedding, instead of waiting 6 months, then ending up not going due to being pregnant.
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Old 06-09-2015, 12:56 AM
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Honestly- no. It was the perfect wedding for us at that time, and I have tons of fond memories from it... no need to redo it.
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Old 06-09-2015, 01:38 AM
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nothing i'd change about the wedding - but i'd love to have had a honeymoon!!
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Old 06-09-2015, 02:22 AM
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Yes and no.

Our beach ceremony was rained out by a tropical storm.

My dress arrived three weeks before the big day...10 sizes too big. (The head of alterations was out of the country...and they couldn't get the correct size in stock until 3 weeks after the wedding.)

Our photographer was terrible. (Not a money issue, more an ignorance on our part issue.)

But in the end...we got married and that was really the whole point....right...

Also, we had no time for a honeymoon (I was in school), so we took one for our 10th anniversary...and come home with an, ahem, souvenir... She's pretty cute if I do say so myself.
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Old 06-09-2015, 09:12 AM
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Quote:
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Yeah, I'd choose a better man...
You took the words outta my mouth!
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Old 06-09-2015, 12:17 PM
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I'd have less people at the actual wedding/ceremony part & been more picky about the photographer. What we paid for and what we got were 2 completely different things. I don't have any photos up because of how horrible they are
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Old 06-09-2015, 12:33 PM
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Not the wedding but the photographer absolutely lol...of course this was back when most wedding photography was done the same. I really don't like my wedding pics
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Old 06-09-2015, 12:49 PM
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I have been married twice. My first wedding to my deceased husband was the traditional church wedding. We were married in December so we had the Christmas flair with it. I don't think I would change a thing. It was all great and perfect for who we were at the time.

My second wedding to my current husband was more low key and I loved it more. It was smaller and on the beach. It was more intimate and relaxed which I really loved.
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Old 06-09-2015, 09:55 PM
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I'd change some things if I were to do it again... smaller crowd, though it's kind of impossible, because, here in Asia, we have the obligation to invite the parents' friends too...
I'll buy a dress that I actually like, that time, my parents' friend give a dress as a gift to me, it was beautiful, but, some of the new dresses these days are so beautiful. I want a better make up definitely and photographer! Our wedding photos weren't all good
I'd want a nice decoration for our reception that we didn't have because we were on tight budget...
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Old 06-09-2015, 11:46 PM
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Yes and no. My sister just got married last month and her wedding was awesome but after seeing all the stress that went into a year and half of planning, I'm kind of glad we planned ours in 6 weeks!

The only thing I'd really love to do differently is get married outside. That was the only thing I had my heart set on (I really wanted a ceremony in the trees or maybe Big Sur!) but it just wasn't possible in December even in Northern CA. My dad actually found this restaurant that had a stream running through the middle of the building so it was kind of outdoor-ish but the place had this hideous green carpet that makes me cringe every time I look at the photos, haha. But it was definitely a unique location for our wedding!

I'd also hire a different photographer. Our photos are nice, just kind of boring and I wish there were more candid moment type shots of us as a couple and not just portraits. But I was so thankful to have found a photographer on such short notice who didn't suck and wasn't crazy expensive that I just went with it.

So maybe I'd like a little more than 6 weeks to plan but not a year and half.
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Old 06-10-2015, 01:13 AM
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Oh I would change a lot, starting with the groom!!

And I would do things the way I want and when, instead of letting others dictate my day.

If/when it happens.... outdoors, fall, sunflowers with deep red and jewel tones, the dress will have color in it, I will wear a pair of cowboy boots, we will write our vows....an awesome photographer and celebrate with a BBQ, bonfire, and dancing.
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Old 06-10-2015, 10:16 PM
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We want to do a vow renewal for our 20th and redo the things we want to change(outdoors vs indoors, etc) but I still love my wedding.
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Old 06-12-2015, 09:30 PM
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I can redo it, I got divorced. My first wedding was beautiful and I loved it and planned every part of it, but I had always wanted to elope. I have no idea what possessed me to suddenly want a huge wedding. If I do it again, I would keep it small and simple and spend the money on a big honeymoon.
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Old 06-12-2015, 10:24 PM
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I wish we had eloped. I was 5 months pregnant when we got married and I was getting to the point of being miserable. I was stressed the whole time planning it. We got married in Las Vegas anyways (we live an hour away) and honestly, I don't remember much. Jon wanted to wear hockey jerseys. I wish we had. It would have been more us. We just aren't into tradition that much.
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Old 06-12-2015, 10:42 PM
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I'm kinda with Jenn and Kendall about the different man. But since he helped make these two kids I love so much, I don't guess I'd change that part of it. Other than that, not too much - the dress was really hot for an outdoor wedding so I'd pick a cooler one, the photographer made my aunt cry so I'd switch that out, everything else turned out pretty well.
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Old 06-13-2015, 12:37 AM
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I wouldn't have changed anything. We eloped and it was awesomesauce. It was us, the pastor and his wife under an archway in a park in Celebration, FL. People kept yelling congratulations at us. I, however, was not prepared for the souvenir we came home with, but she turned out pretty great too.
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Old 06-13-2015, 12:58 PM
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I swore after our wedding that if something were to happen and I were in the position of getting married again that I would just go to a JP and call it done. Planning the wedding was stressful. My family was ridiculous. We changed our wedding date 3x for his family. There was issues with just about everything. The day itself was okay. My family, again, was ridiculous. My grandma, the only person from my side that I really wanted there, was in the hospital. My uncle got lost and decided to go see my grandma instead (which was nice for her as she was feeling really down). My MIL had to yell at my mom, who was being a witch. A friend's car broke down before he got there. It was all just drama, start to finish. At the end of the day, we were married, and that was the important part. We didn't have a honeymoon though, barely a weekend off work.

My kids want us to renew our vows for our 20th, in 3 years. I'm kinda open to the idea. I want to do a destination ceremony in some place tropical, our kids as our wedding party and hopefully my SIL and her family there with us. That's all... very simple and quiet. No drama.
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Old 06-13-2015, 04:59 PM
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I would redo it with getting married by the justice of the peace at the local courthouse. Then we would be able to use the money to buy things for our first apartment instead of starting our married life off in debt because we literally owned nothing but the clothes on our backs!
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Old 06-13-2015, 06:07 PM
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Yes, we had a big, traditional wedding, but looking back I can't even remember most of it! It was more about making sure everyone was happy than focusing on just the two of us. There were too many details to worry about, we were shuffled all over the place for photographs and greeting people we didn't even freaking know. I didn't have a single bite of the food I meticulously planned and got one sip of champagne and one bite of cake (for the photos, of course). I would tell my younger self to say no to meddling family, have a small, intimate wedding and focus more on who mattered that day...me and Kyle.
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Old 06-13-2015, 06:15 PM
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I wouldn't have changed anything. We eloped and it was awesomesauce. It was us, the pastor and his wife under an archway in a park in Celebration, FL. People kept yelling congratulations at us. I, however, was not prepared for the souvenir we came home with, but she turned out pretty great too.
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Old 06-13-2015, 06:26 PM
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I have to chuckle at the number of us that would have wanted different photographers... . Is it because photos mean so much to us because we are scrappers or where they really that bad?

I, too, would have gotten a different photographer... I loathed what we got - they were over priced, the person we "interviewed" wasn't even the one that came to do our photos - which I guess was kind of a blessing given friends of the family had her and they got really weird photos... our photographer brought her mother along and chit chatted with her the whole time. She would get such a pained look on her face when we request a certain photo. Then we were promised a sunset photo - which was part of the package - never got that. And on top of that - it really, really ticks me off that I can't have the negatives - even 10 years later!

Also, I would have loved a smaller wedding... who knew that grudges would hold for 60 years because one of the band players (we had my father-in-laws big band playing the reception) crossed a picket line in like the 1940's - which ticked off one of my hubby's great uncles that they left early. And it would have been great if my mom wasn't battling breast cancer during the planning of the wedding.
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Old 06-14-2015, 01:21 AM
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Oh, we didn't have an actual "wedding". DH and I decided to get married but we didn't want anyone to know (just for fun). So, one morning we went to the ritual house, we signed up and then he went to work and I went to my parents' and told them They were shocked but said "well, that's to be expected from you two" Honestly, I wouldn't change a thing...those big weddings have never been to my liking, I feel like the bride and the groom are under a lot of pressure and can't really enjoy themselves. At least, if it were me, it would've been like that. Also, the money spent on a wedding day can be better spent on some real necessities or a memorable trip, I'd really love some pretty bridal pictures though -- probably that's the one thing I'd change.
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Old 06-14-2015, 09:26 PM
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Oh, reading everyone else's I would also change the photographer, even though now my pictures are obviously no longer displayed. I hated ours. We interviewed a big company in town that had many photos of the site we had chosen to get married on their walls displayed. I had expectations that I would receive those photos. In my naivety with photography at the time, I had no clue that the person I was interviewing would not be the person at my wedding and thus have no idea about the request I had. We had a horse and carriage at our wedding which was normal for our site, but the photographer did not take one picture of the entire thing. We got a bunch of pictures of a carriage with a horse's butt in it. That's right, he cut the horse in half in every single picture. He also didn't take one step to the left during the ceremony so he could include our entire bridal party, instead I have half my bridesmaids blocked by a light pole. He didn't bring gloves on a cold day so he rushed through all pictures. He was super quiet and refused to ask people to do what he wanted. Instead he whispered to me and had be request people do what he wanted. All of the pictures with the best man, my ex's eyes were closed in (we did have digital photography then, so he could look and see). I requested some candid photos and got only stiff posed photos. I was so unhappy. The studio did refund some money, but it doesn't really help.
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Old 06-14-2015, 09:56 PM
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That's an interesting question/thread!
Like Becca I have been married twice and for my current one I'd change almost eveeything! :/
I wish I have photos because I just have a few non professional and we also didn't have a wedding ceremony just the one with the judge! While I'm completely happy with hubby (and this I wouldn't change a thing) and all... I miss having good memories like nice photografies and a special and very intimate ocasion with my parents/sister and best friends but it wasn't possible for us at that time!
Well nothing is perfect... but we are so happy together for 8 years that it doesn't really matter! lol

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Old 06-14-2015, 10:35 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lovely1m View Post
I can redo it, I got divorced.
same!!

When/If it happens..I'll make sure it's US..neither of us like spotlight or to be the center of attention. We are both pretty shy so it'll be small and more than likely very private. He probably wants a wedding more than I do lol I'd be happy with a Vegas chapel
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Old 06-14-2015, 10:47 PM
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Generally speaking, no. There were a few things that didn't go as planned, but they didn't materially affect the event. People still talk about how much fun they had at our wedding 13 years later, so I consider it a success
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Old 06-15-2015, 05:09 PM
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Yes...I'd have a backup photographer. A photographer friend did our photos, and they were all accidentally deleted before we were able to get them
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Old 06-15-2015, 07:50 PM
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Yes I wouldn't have let my MIL dictate the day as much as she did. I would have stuck to my original plan of my favorite flowers and guest who were invited would have been my choice not hers. That's what happens unfortunately when you do a destination wedding so close to the IL's. I got a lot of you won't have time to make your own flowers, yes I would have and I was a florist and I knew that. I however let her take care of it and regret it to this day. They invited their friends without asking, should have said please don't invite anyone we do not knows as it was meant to be intimate. Other then that no not a thing beautiful by the beach with the man I still love truly to this day almost 12 years later
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Old 06-17-2015, 12:07 AM
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Photographers - Ours was good. I just wish I had known more of what I wanted. He would have been happy to oblige. I just had no idea what kinds of shots I wanted, really. I started scrapping right after our wedding so by that time I had plenty of ideas and was out of luck. LOL I wish we had done more outdoor pictures because those are definitely my favorites, but it POURED all morning and only really stopped for a while shortly after the ceremony. We rushed out to get pictures outside before it rained again. - I would definitely go with a different photographer if I did it NOW, but I think my photographer was great for 17 years ago when I got married. - He no longer does photography. When he was gearing up to retired he gave us our negatives, which I thought was really nice.
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