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  #1  
Old 02-01-2022, 02:20 PM
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Default Advice to your 16 yo self

This thought came to mind today since we're kicking off our 16th birthday today ...

What advice would you give your 16-year old self?
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  #2  
Old 02-01-2022, 02:28 PM
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All of the things I've told my girls:
- don't believe the rumor mill, especially about other girls
- just when you think you have one thing figured out, there will be 100 other things to figure out, so take things in stride
- perfection is not an ideal, it's a myth
- take responsibility for your mistakes, no matter how painful
- "no" is a valid answer to any and everything you do not feel comfortable doing; never say "yes" out of fear or intimidation
- your feelings are temporary, your actions are not
- self-care is the most important care, don't save it for last
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Old 02-01-2022, 02:42 PM
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pfff I don't even know... it seems so far away and I wasn't a bad seed.

Follow your own path!
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Old 02-01-2022, 02:46 PM
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Stop smoking!!!
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Old 02-01-2022, 03:08 PM
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A lot of the same things Jenny said above.
I think another one for me would have been....research writing careers that you can go to college for. (I never knew that I had options)
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Old 02-01-2022, 03:45 PM
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Don't worry so much, have fun and give yourself a break. Also, you're gonna hate seeing photos of yourself with the perm and poufy hair! LOL
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Old 02-01-2022, 04:01 PM
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hmmm... I'm not sure. In some ways I don't know if i'd want to tell my younger self anything because I think sometimes the good and bad is how we got to where we are? Maybe I'd tell myself to talk more to that cute boy I worked with since he'd become my husband :P

ps.. i'm the type of person who likes to give advice but i never actually listen to any of it myself LOL
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Old 02-01-2022, 04:49 PM
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I think I would tell myself I am enough! I struggled with bad boyfriends/parents going through divorce. I would also tell myself to have fun! Enjoy life, every moment counts!

I passed a guy today when coming home from morning drop off and he has stuck with me all day. He was in his 20s to 30s...walking down the road blowing bubbles. He was smiling and just happy. we need more people like this in the word. Happy and carefree!!
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Old 02-01-2022, 04:55 PM
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The things you dream most about WILL happen. Have patience in that knowledge.
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  #10  
Old 02-01-2022, 06:28 PM
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Be you you are not what others want you to be.
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  #11  
Old 02-01-2022, 07:18 PM
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Have fun . You'll love your husband and children and you'll be happy with the family you create, but enjoy yourself more before those wonderful obligations happen.
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  #12  
Old 02-01-2022, 07:50 PM
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Stop trying to find the love of your life & just LIVE YOUR LIFE! I spent so much time with boys and missed out on all the fun my friends were having.

Def Leppard wrong about love; love should NOT hurt!

Your parents are SO MUCH WISER than you give them credit for. Listen to them!
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Old 02-01-2022, 08:00 PM
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Wow! Great advice, ladies!
I had to think about my answer for a bit.

I would love to wrap my arms around my 16-year old self and tell her to DO the things you're afraid of. You have to at least try. It's okay to make mistakes. You are enough.

I'm not crying, you're crying
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  #14  
Old 02-01-2022, 08:41 PM
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Ditch the boyfriend, he's a loser! Never let a guy push you around or try to control you!!!
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  #15  
Old 02-01-2022, 08:46 PM
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Just go for an associates degree program for college and not bachelors because you are never going to finish it and you realize that teaching in an actual school is the last thing you want to do.
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  #16  
Old 02-01-2022, 09:26 PM
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Stop making a big deal out of doing what you think is right and just DO it.
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  #17  
Old 02-02-2022, 11:29 AM
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Don't let your mom talk you out of going away to college, ask for help at school for financial assistance.... finish college before the babies come...

I did go to community college and paid for every last bit of it myself working two sometimes three jobs. Did not finish my associate, but I did finish my CDA.
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  #18  
Old 02-02-2022, 12:49 PM
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Enjoy your life NOW and don't be in such a rush to grow up and move out!
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  #19  
Old 02-02-2022, 04:33 PM
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You are skinny and pretty. Please, stop believing that you are not.
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  #20  
Old 02-02-2022, 06:42 PM
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You aren't fat. Objectively. Even if you were, you would still be okay. And beautiful. Yes, you can be fat and beautiful. You can be beautiful at any size. Really.

Don't make yourself smaller to make other people feel bigger. Take up all the space you need & do it loudly.

You don't have to be perfect to be worthy of love or being loved.

Your person is out there but you aren't going to meet him for a really, really, really long time. You need to work on yourself, anyways, because you've got a long way to go until you become the person you were meant to be. Guess what happens when you finally reach that point? Yup. He's worth the wait and the work. I promise.

If you only knew how little other people think about you, you wouldn't worry so much about them. Wear the pink, the sparkles, the crown, the unicorn onesie, all the things that make you happy. Let your heart sing.

Go to the doctor. And the dentist. Regularly.
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  #21  
Old 02-02-2022, 10:44 PM
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Don't worry so much about making the right, most responsible life choices. Spend some of your youth being young and enjoying the freedom--travel and spend some time figuring out what you really want instead of always doing what you think you should do. (P.S. Don't go to grad school the first time. The idea of being able to work part time at a higher pay level when your kids are young is a good one, but it's going to end up being a waste when a son with disabilities needs you at home full time during those years.)
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Old 02-06-2022, 06:39 PM
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Stand up for yourself. Be proud of who you are.
Go to university, don't settle for a lesser path, even if you're not sure what you want to do with your life.
Stop trying to fit in, and start standing out.
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  #23  
Old 02-06-2022, 07:07 PM
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No one has it ALL together.
Everyone is struggling with something.
No one is perfect and you will never be perfect, nor are you meant to be.
The past shaped you but it does not define you.
It's okay to stand out. It's also okay to fit in. With your tribe you will do both.
Mental health is vital. Never be ashamed to ask for help.
STOP FEELING GUILTY about every little thing in your life. LET IT GO.
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  #24  
Old 02-06-2022, 11:07 PM
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I think it would be the same thing I told my son. Even though you don't realize it, the decision you are making today, will impact the rest of your life so choose wisely.
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  #25  
Old 02-06-2022, 11:52 PM
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If I had to tell my 16 year old self anything it would be...You are stronger than you think and this too shall pass.
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  #26  
Old 02-07-2022, 01:36 AM
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  • Be kind, be forgiving.
  • Be true to yourself, don't compromise your principles
  • Try to look on at the positive, overcome the negative

I'm all about self-awareness these days.
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  #27  
Old 02-07-2022, 03:08 AM
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Don't get that perm when you are 18!! It's NOT a good look for you. I repeat IT IS NOT A GOOD LOOK!!!!
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  #28  
Old 02-07-2022, 07:30 AM
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If you aren't ready for college/university at 18, thats ok, there are other alternatives. College/University isn't right for everyone. I wish I had taken that advice and not leant into societal pressure of everyone must do a degree out of high school, its the only way to get a good job.

I did go to college straight out of high school for a few failed qualifications that I dropped out of/failed....I hadn't found the right fit for me. I should have waited until I did my second round of foundation courses that lead me to start my degree at 24 or 25 years old. I was far happier, enjoyed most courses and best of all passed them all the first time!
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Old 02-07-2022, 09:17 AM
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Stay true to yourself, and don't worry so much about what everyone else is thinking / doing. (I can still use that advice today... )
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  #30  
Old 02-07-2022, 01:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mirjam View Post
Don't get that perm when you are 18!! It's NOT a good look for you. I repeat IT IS NOT A GOOD LOOK!!!!
Did someone say bad perm at 18???

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Old 02-07-2022, 02:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ponytails View Post
Did someone say bad perm at 18???

Bwahahahaha! Exactly!! But you still look kinda cute I swear I definitely did not!!!

I threw away all evidence of me having that perm years and years ago. I couldn't look at them!! So I can't even show you the proof.

I do have to say it wasn't just the perm in the photos but also my make up! OMG brown from top to bottom. As if I had 2 black eyes!
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Old 02-07-2022, 10:05 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mirjam View Post
Bwahahahaha! Exactly!! But you still look kinda cute I swear I definitely did not!!!

I threw away all evidence of me having that perm years and years ago. I couldn't look at them!! So I can't even show you the proof.

I do have to say it wasn't just the perm in the photos but also my make up! OMG brown from top to bottom. As if I had 2 black eyes!
LOL I can't even imagine what that must have looked like!!
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  #33  
Old 02-07-2022, 11:12 PM
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Girls, you have nothing on me when it comes to the perm. Not to mention the asymmetrical cut. LOL



I swear, a bird could have built a nest in all that mess! LOL
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  #34  
Old 02-08-2022, 03:20 AM
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LOL.......
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  #35  
Old 02-08-2022, 09:44 AM
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Oh I had that big permed hair…. I actually started perming at 14 and didn’t stop till a few years ago….

I’m still getting used to straightening my hair. Lol. My natural hair wants to do some 60s looking flip….





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Old 02-08-2022, 12:28 PM
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Loving all the perm pics! Weren't the 80's the best???
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  #37  
Old 02-08-2022, 12:33 PM
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Ugh! The perms. SO many perms.
In my mind I'm lookin like Kelly LeBrock, in reality... Annie (just not with red hair).
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  #38  
Old 02-09-2022, 10:07 PM
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LOL, Annie.
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  #39  
Old 02-09-2022, 10:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ponytails View Post
Loving all the perm pics! Weren't the 80's the best???
ROFL! My mom was a hairdresser, so it was non-stop perms for me!
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  #40  
Old 02-09-2022, 10:30 PM
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Don't get wrapped up in the cheerleaders and the quarterbacks. If they are not your type, don't try to change. It isn't gonna happen! I didn't need a perm, I have naturally curly hair. Don't use an iron to straighten it! Don't trust your instincts!
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