How do you feel about going gray?

[MissKim]

A little backstory: I have been coloring my hair fairly regularly since I was 18. It has been every six weeks since my early 30s due to my hair turning white. Not gray, really. White.

So at what age will you allow your air to show natural gray? I turn 43 this year. White hair runs in my family. I had a cousin who was white haired at her wedding. She was 25.

I last colored my hair in late April. I've got roots that are showing about an inch. I'm a teacher and don't have anything professional until the end of July. I'm strongly considering letting it go until I have to go back to school in order to give my hair a break from the constant coloring. I'm even considering not coloring it ever and just cutting it super short before school (it's been super short in the past and has taken me two years to grow it out chin length). Think Carol on The Walking Dead. Except I'm a lot fluffier.

Am I too young to let my hair go gray/white? Should I continue to color? (I do it myself using a permanent box color.) I just can't decide. And mostly... I hate hair. I'd be happy being bald because I hate my thick hair that I constantly have to color.

It doesn't help that my husband has been completely gray for five years. He gets really cranky when I color because he won't (thinks it's stupid for a guy to color) so why should I do it? However, when I bounced this off him, he thought I'd be happier not going white.

Now I've rambled... any thoughts on this subject?

[Traci Reed]

I'm pro-gray! I've always said that I'm going to let it come as it will. I'm not a big hair color person anyway.

That being said, my mom is 57 and is just now showing real gray so it'll come a lot later for me.

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[lauren grier]

I've had some silver hair since I was two (really).. lol. I dyed my hair consistently from around 17-29 as I noticed I was def greying early. Then my meds made my hair get a little thinner (was always super thick) and I freaked out LOL.. My grandmother started going baldish pretty young and I just refuse She also constantly dyed her hair so I decided to just stop. Bf and of course my brother make fun of me for the silvery white hair mixed in with the rest but, whatever.

Maybe you could let it grow out, cut off all the dyed hair and start using henna dye instead? that way you're not using all the chemically stuff and damaging your hair but you still get a bit of colour? granted.. I have no idea how well henna dye covers grey lol

[flergs]

If I were white, I'd stop dyeing mine black and go for blonde or a much lighter caramel colour. That way it's barely noticeable with regrowth and only taking the harsh white off a little.

I was a hairdresser for many years and found that most people who try going natural, end up goung for some colour after a few weeks

Megs xxx
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[KristinCB]

I was sure that because my mom didn't start going grey until later in life the same would happen for me... alas.. in the last year i've noticed white hairs sprouting up! ack! I was shocked.. and im like you it isn't grey it's WHITE! and the texture is totally different..

I get my hair highlighted so idk...

[MissKim]

Megs, do you think I should start using a semi-permanent color? I usually go for darkest brown because that's what color I am naturally but I could start gradually going lighter.

[Darcy Baldwin]

I love my natural silvery highlights

I'm noticing there are more and more of them now that I'm turning 50, and I have never colored my hair. I love the look of gray on ladies who have great haircuts or who can pull of long gray hair well. I say be free!

I'd love to be able to pull of Carol's haircut!

[flergs]

I usually advise going lighter because there's less contrast with regrowth. But also it looks more natural. I still go black because 90% of my hair is still black. But if you're white underneath then I'd go lighter. Do it gradually a shade lighter each time Then if you do stay grey, it's less of a shock too.

Megs xxx
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[lauren grier]

according to my google most people with silver hair are young hipster emo teens. So. You'd fit in with the young crowd! lol

[rach3975]

I'm not sure yet what I'm going to do. I'm 39 and have a few grays mixed in, but nothing noticeable from a distance. I've never colored my hair, to hide grays or for any other reason. I say I'm just going to let it happen when it happens, but I have a feeling when the time comes I won't like it and will dye it dark again. Sounds like Megs' solution makes sense. Good luck!

[flergs]

You could try some amazing shades in between. Copper or caramel. Even they could be a huge difference and less obvious regrowth too

Megs xxx
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[MissKim]

I really think I'm going to let it go until mid-July and maybe color it right before my birthday. I'll go a little lighter than normal. My mom's natural hair color is the same as mine and I remember she always used "ash blonde" when I was a teen. Now she's let it grow gray, but she's in her late 60s. Maybe by then I'll be able to let it go. I just don't think I can pull off cute and gray yet. Emo, I could do, Lauren.

[flergs]

My Mum is 65 and I dye hers still. She went grey once and it aged her too much. Carol can rock it though lol.

Megs xxx
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[nesser1981]

I'm a natural red head, Strawberry Blonde, and I've never dyed my hair, ever! But, I am getting a lot of white hairs, I'm only 33. My Granny's hair turned white when she was pretty young too, I think.

Having red hair has always been my thing, so I can't see myself going all white until I'm much older, probably 60's, at least! LOL! I am nervous about dying my hair when the time comes, I'll probably start with blond highlights and see how long I can get away with that before I dye it all together.

[mariewilcox]

I'm going to be 52 two weeks from today I'm naturally a medium blonde so greys havne't been a huge issue but I've had a few pop up in the front on top where my bangs start at the crown. It's not the color so much that bugs me but the texture - they're so coarse and stick straight up! This past year though they've been coming in around the hairline by my ears (think of the hair that you would tuck behind your ears). I have nothing against going grey but mine is in patches and isn't in "highlights" or streaks (in which case I would be inclined to let it go). I do a semi-permanent color that is almost a perfect match to my natural color.

[mrshobbes]

I think I'm ambivalent for the most part about my white hair (I have a whole chunk of it on just one part of my head), but when I color my top sections it's usually in a darker shade.

Then I bleach the rest of my hair to get the fake ombre effect

[kristijoy]

Originally Posted by flergs

If I were white, I'd stop dyeing mine black and go for blonde or a much lighter caramel colour. That way it's barely noticeable with regrowth and only taking the harsh white off a little.

I was a hairdresser for many years and found that most people who try going natural, end up goung for some colour after a few weeks

Megs xxx
{Using Tapatalk}

This sounds beautiful!

My natural color is ash blonde. I started going grey in my 30's. First it was nice silvery streaks. Now that I'm 45 it's mostly grey. Somewhere in my mid 30's I started highlighting it. The last one I did had both high and low lights which I really like It still has some natural grey with these sparkly top notes and the deep low color. I really like it.

[adi&co.]

i was white haired as a kid! I dno't think i'd mind having white hair as a young adult if it was healthy looking hair. I don't color mine and will just let it go whatever color. i will probably get white hair as well since my mom's hair is going white and so is my dad's.

[knlchevys]

I'm 35 and if I didn't color I would be totally white. It's bad. I am a teacher too. I don't feel like I'm ready to not color yet. I started going gray/white at 25. I go to a hairdresser and she told me last time "You know if we didn't do this you would be totally white." Thanks, I feel awesome!

[knlchevys]

I teach Kindergarten and fear I'd scare my class away!

[SeattleSheri]

Ok, here's my honest (general) opinion.

Gray can look very classy and wonderful, but it does age you. So it really just depends on how important it is to maintain an image close to your age. For example, I work with someone who is 33 and has a full head of silver hair, he is constantly mistaken for someone far older just due to his hair color, even though his facial features and skin look young. Obviously there is no right or wrong answer, just what's right for you.

I started dying my hair about 3-4 years ago. I'm actually not sure what % gray I am, but I do have a shock of gray hair at my temple (think cuella). I dye my hair every 4 weeks. I have dark hair, but at some point I'm going to totally switch to going lighter so the maintenance isn't as noticeable. I just use box coloring ... $7 and 25 minutes every 4 weeks is pretty doable to me. I'm in the category of not willing to accept looking older. I started getting grays in my teens.

[adrianka]

What Sherri said. :-)

There is no right or wrong in this. My hair is already at least 50% white and has been so since my late twenties... so I pretty much dye it, and plan to do so for a veeeery long time. All women in my family dyed theirs until a very high age, so I have that example, hehe.

[sprauncey1]

What about using henna haircolor for the summer? It comes in different shades and is so healthy for the hair. I used it here in Kuwait to help blend my highlights (which took over most of my hair by the end) back into my natural color (brown) because hair coloring here is $$$$. I used the Morocco Method stuff and other than smelling like mud for a few hours (ok and while my hair was wet afterwards) my hair was soooooooo softer/healthy. I don't need to use it anymore for the color aspect as it has been 2.5 years and my hair has all grown out, but I do it for the conditioning treatment. The water here is like acid I swear!

[jak]

Grey hairs - ugh! I don't like them - because they are so obvious against my dark brown hair and I FEEL old when I see them. I started colouring them about a year ago and will keep doing it until there's more grey ones than my natural colour and when they become more high maintenance and regrowth is more obvious... I'll worry about what to do after that when that time comes.

[pewtertm]

Pro-gray here. I definitely am sprouting a lot of white hairs right in the front. But I've had hairdressers ask who highlights my hair...I told them God did, via my spouse and kid. LOL. My hair is doing what my dad's did...sort of fading into another color.

Mom had walnut colored hair and when she started going gray, she colored it. Ten years later she was diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma. In doing research, we discovered that some studies link dark hair dye to lymphoma. That, combined with our family history, was enough to persuade her not to dye her hair anymore (once it grew back that is). She now has gorgeous silver hair.

[glumirk]

I've never dyed my hair and hope to never dye it. As a natural red, I'm not a huge fan of the fakes (no offense, it's just not for me).

I also think it's silly how much we worry about age (it's bad in my family. My mom and grandma still claim to be 29) when all it is is a number and hopefully a bit more wisdom/experience. I turn 28 next week, so we will see how I feel in 10 years.

If you rock a stylish cut, still wear fashionable makeup, jewelry, and clothes, I don't see why gray should age you. We've just all been raised to believe that it does.

And as far as course ness goes, I wonder if protein or deep conditioning would help. Healthy hair is happy hair.


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[breakingbrie]

I'm 33, and my older brother and younger sister have had grey for years!! They both also didn't handle turning 30 very well, and I assumed that since it didn't bother me turning 30, that maybe it wouldn't bother me when I get greys. I actually thought I found one a couple years ago, and I didn't handle it well!! Like I felt sick to my stomach. But turns out it's just a shiny hair. I always ask when I'm getting a cut or trim if they can find any, but I just have a few shiny almost goldish hairs. Nothing silvery/white yet. I've never colored my hair, but I've been thinking of lightening lately, or getting some kind of highlights, so I'm guessing that when I do start to get greys, that's probably going to be the push to start me coloring. I don't think I will like getting greys.

Not sure if that helps you any!! But I think I will color

[adrianka]

Originally Posted by glumirk

I've never dyed my hair and hope to never dye it. As a natural red, I'm not a huge fan of the fakes (no offense, it's just not for me).

I also think it's silly how much we worry about age (it's bad in my family. My mom and grandma still claim to be 29) when all it is is a number and hopefully a bit more wisdom/experience. I turn 28 next week, so we will see how I feel in 10 years.

If you rock a stylish cut, still wear fashionable makeup, jewelry, and clothes, I don't see why gray should age you. We've just all been raised to believe that it does.

And as far as course ness goes, I wonder if protein or deep conditioning would help. Healthy hair is happy hair.


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Wouldn't say it's so much worrying about age in many cases as it's about liking how you look. I'm 38 and I actually enjoy getting older, no panic from the 40s or anything. I think age comes hand in hand with the ability to be happy. :-) But I look horrid with grey hair, so I dye. That's all there is to it. :-)

[Lindsay]

37 here and I've had to do caramel highlights over auburn for the last five years to help blend in between salon visits. Otherwise, my hair is near-black so they really stand out if I don't dye it.

[lovely1m]

I think you should do whatever you are comfortable with. I do not see myself allowing my hair to go gray ever though. On a man, I am ok with it going gray in their late 30s. It can be very handsome then.

[IntenseMagic]

I am 48 and have only 2 or 3 grey hairs here and there. My hair is naturally a kind of ugly brown, so I've had it highlighted for years on top (with my one red streak) and the underneath is natural just because I think I look better with it lighter around my face. I have no problem with going grey. I think I am going to look at it as my natural highlights I told my hairdresser that if it would ever start really going grey, we could just start blending it in. My DH is 5 years younger than I am and is almost totally grey. He has that great salt and pepper look going on, with a pinch more salt these days ha.

[Sherri Tierney]

I had highlights put in my hair, once, 5 years ago. I am debating now whether to have highlights done again or to dye it. I'm a natural redhead and I've learned to embrace my hair color over the years. I am starting to get some good patches of whites though. They come in right at my part and they really do age me. If I part my hair differently so that they aren't as apparent I look younger than I do if I let my hair part naturally, where those stubborn white hairs are. Not just older, I feel like they make me look tired. I don't need that. I haven't decided whether to just try highlights to blend in the whites or whether to color all over. I did order a custom color blend from eSalon. I'm not sure if I will be brave enough to try it or not though. I usually chicken out!

[MissKim]

I don't mind aging at all. I love being 43. I just don't want to go gray and look like I'm 63... know what I mean? I don't want my students to call me grandma. Which is why I'll probably continue to color. I just think it's a little too early to let it go.

[nietis]

I'll be 30 in November and I have few whites since I was little, so I really don't mind it very much, since it's not so obvious. I did colour my hair several times when I was in 20s, just because I was following the trend and wanted to look cool LOL! But now, I'll stay with my natural colours, since I'm happy with it. Mine is dark brown at the outside and darker brown almost black in the inside.

[staciahall]

I'm about 90% gray (says the hairdresser) and have been for about 8 years or so now. We agreed that we were going to keep coloring it for a few more years. She said she would let me know when it's time. My problem is that I can't really do any other color very well. My skin coloring fights really badly with other colors (and trust me I tried several in my younger days). My son who is 20 already has a few hundred gray hairs. Their father was quite gray in his 20's, fully gray in his 30's and both my kids have inherited it. At least, my son seems okay with it. As for me, I'm not sure how we're going to do it when I go gray, I guess we'll have to grow it out until I can't stand it, REALLY highlight it gray and cut it off super short. Maybe about 5 years or so...

[Stacey42]

I'm 47. I have a lot of grey on the underside of my head and what I consider to be a cool white streak right up front where I part my hair. It started when I was about 40. My mom did the 'frosted' look from the mid-70s until recently (she's 73) so I have no idea when she actually went mostly grey.

I'm pro natural look. I'm way too lazy (and cheap) to do the work of coloring my hair with any regularity. Did it for the hell of it in my 20s and know I cannot manage to keep up with it.

[origami]

I'm with Sherri on this one and for the same reasons. It's a personal choice. I have mine professionally done but it's like the one "me" thing that I do.

[DawnMarch]

I started getting greys in my early 20s and so started highlighting in my late 20s. After highlighting, and then full head highlights and lowlights, for a long time, I switched to coloring it myself at home which saves a huge amount of time and $. I just consider it one of those basic maintenance things so I doubt I will let it go grey for many years yet. Maybe when I'm in my 60s? I'm 48 now. There must be an age where your general appearance catches up to your grey hair so that the grey hair isn't so "aging" anymore??

[jesskab]

Originally Posted by nesser1981

I'm a natural red head, Strawberry Blonde, and I've never dyed my hair, ever! But, I am getting a lot of white hairs, I'm only 33. My Granny's hair turned white when she was pretty young too, I think.

Having red hair has always been my thing, so I can't see myself going all white until I'm much older, probably 60's, at least! LOL! I am nervous about dying my hair when the time comes, I'll probably start with blond highlights and see how long I can get away with that before I dye it all together.

I'm a natural redhead too. I'm 37. I have a horrid thick white streak in my right part. Think Cruella. The white just doesn't go well with the pale skin & freckles. I've found the red dyes can't put back what is natural. I've settled for "light reddish brown". I really miss my natural copper & gold colors.

[ashersmommy]

So glad I'm not alone! I started noticing silver hairs right before I became pregnant with my 1.5 year old. I'm 31 and still look pretty young and I don't want these hairs to age me anymore than I am. I'm probably less than 1% silver but they are all bunched up underneath in two areas near my temples. I'm nursing still so I don't want to use hair color until she's fully weaned so now I refuse to put my hair up unless I'm at home and staying home because I don't want other's to see it. It's summer and HOT so I'm a bit loony I guess.

[ashersmommy]

Originally Posted by jesskab

I'm a natural redhead too. I'm 37. I have a horrid thick white streak in my right part. Think Cruella. The white just doesn't go well with the pale skin & freckles. I've found the red dyes can't put back what is natural. I've settled for "light reddish brown". I really miss my natural copper & gold colors.

YES! I used to use the Natural Instincts medium auburn dye when I was younger but it had a funky maroon/purplish effect on my hair. I'm not a redhead but I have medium brown hair with natural auburn and copper highlights that are considerably lighter in the summer. My daughter has seemed to inherit the same color but I can't even find a hair dye that comes close to my natural color. I might have to settle for a copperish brown instead and give up the auburn which is sad because I love it. Can they make custom hair color lol? Not that I would waste money on it but if they don't, they should!

[adrianka]

Originally Posted by ashersmommy

YES! I used to use the Natural Instincts medium auburn dye when I was younger but it had a funky maroon/purplish effect on my hair. I'm not a redhead but I have medium brown hair with natural auburn and copper highlights that are considerably lighter in the summer. My daughter has seemed to inherit the same color but I can't even find a hair dye that comes close to my natural color. I might have to settle for a copperish brown instead and give up the auburn which is sad because I love it. Can they make custom hair color lol? Not that I would waste money on it but if they don't, they should!

A good hairdresser can mix any colour.

[Sherri Tierney]

ESalon is supposed to be able to give you a custom color based on pictures and such. I'm not sure how much they can *really* tell from a picture, but I'm going to give it a shot. I want to stay as close to my natural color as possible for as long as possible. My great, great grandmother died in her 90's with hair the same color as mine. She never had a single white hair. I find that shocking as I started getting them so young myself, but it is nice to know that I'm not necessarily doomed to be all white at 45 or something.