just a heads up

[junebug]

if you're in La's ct you already know all this. i'll make it short and sweet.

DH and i are getting separated. he doesn't feel like he loves me anymore and needs some time on his own to sort out things. we might end up back together or we might not. i'm going to hopefully get some low income housing and a job at some point i hope. don't know at this point if i'll be able to afford internet but i hope so. i'm completely heartbroken at this point. my face and eyes are all puffy and red from crying. i went and go milk and i must look awful; people kept looking twice at me, lol. we aren't fighting. we are civil to each other, but its almost like he's excited. at moving on and maybe finding someone else. and here i sit still loving him and feel like he ripped out my heart and ran over it with his truck. meanwhile his mom blames me cause i don't keep the house spotless but yet doesn't think he should have to help me. he should get to sit on the computer all day but yet i shouldn't be on it cause i have a house to keep clean and kids to take care of. i mean, yah i do have those responsibilities but i didnt have these kids by myself. he should help out too. i hate her. i'd like 'accidently' run over her. i think she is hoping i'll not get the kids so she can have them. or else she'll turn me in to welfare herself and claim i'm unfit. which i really scared she'll do.

so yah, if i'm not around much you know why. i'll keep everyone posted.