If you could turn back time...

[scrapperjade]

Do you ever wish you could? Just to do 1 thing differently?

I have a huge regret. I wanted SO badly to have newborn pictures taken of Avalynne, and looked all over the net to find a photographer to do them. I found a couple I liked, but they were about $400 for the session (and only included a few actual prints - the extras were like $20 a piece), and we could not afford it (trust me, I really tried). I looked for a good couple months with no luck. So we didn't do them.

Now I find I can't look at newborn photos, as much as I love them, because I feel SO broken-hearted about not having any. When we have baby #2 (not expecting yet), I definitely want to have some done. I've found a photographer (now... 2 years later!). But now I have mommy guilt. That I will have them for baby #2, but not for my firstborn. Especially because I wanted them SO bad.

I'm thinking that a compromise would be to have a family session done when the 2nd (unconcieved, lol) baby comes, and getting just a couple newborn shots, and the rest focus on us as a family. That way it won't be like I had a "special" session for one, but not the other.

But, oh, do I wish I could go back and just splurge on that session. They would have been amazing.

[Sharon Kay]

You mean like the ones they take in the hospital...or come home and drive out to a photographer for a pro session? I didn't buy the ones in the hospital (they were so expensive and looked like YKW) ... and I didn't get any pro ones done ... never even thought about it ... I was trying to recover all 3 times and wasn't up to driving any where. I have photos dh took and that is it....I'm happy with those.

It was probably 3 months before I had any pics taken by someone (if that early) ... I'll have to go back and look. I had a c-section with 2 of the kids so I wasn't driving for a couple of months ... and with the middle one I had a separated pelvic bone and didn't drive for over 3 months ... so no newborn pro photos for me.

Thinking on how much that would cost ... I'd rather put the money into a really good camera for MYSELF and/or a nice lens ... then you can continue to take really cool shots of any and all of your children.

[Megan Turnidge]

I hear ya! My one thing I wish I could do over was to hire a professional to take our wedding photos. Ours were done for free from someone who didn't know what he was doing... and shot it all in auto. Sometimes it makes me so sad to look at my pics with my teal looking dress and horribly underexposed faces.... and there was only so much I could do to improve them (our wedding photos were the reason I got PSE in the first place... so I could try and fix them).

I really want to do a trash the dress session sometime with hubby.... it wouldn't be the same, but I think it'd make up for it a little bit and could be really fun!

[nun69]

if I could turn backtime I would have kept up with college and finished, but that is water under the bridge and I am lucky enough to be able to pass my GIBill on to my kids

funny you mention the newborn photo stuff because my oldest DD was the only one I had newborn shots taken of and I have 4 kids if I could go back and spurge I probably would have done it, but since I didn't do it then I just splurged and had family potraits taken back in April and was super pleased...even though I spent roughly $600 for 15 digital prints {I can print up to 8x10 as many times as I want} a family collage and a few other big potraits {16x20} and since she let me do a payment plan of $100 every 2 weeks, so I don't feel as guilty

[jessica31876]

yes...it is really depressing and just an awful story. I plan on doing a layout someday about it. Basically there were issues as a child where my mom lost custody of me and my sister because of things that happened to us (my sister and me). Because of this she blamed us and she burned all of the pictures of me and my siblings so I dont really have any pictures from about the time I was 15 and younger. I think I have two school photos of me. The sad thing is my real father was a photographer so there were lots of pictures of all of us kids (there were five of us). So really if I could I would try to save some of them from being destroyed.

[LenaGardner]

I understand

I only have a professional newborn shoot with Parker. I felt guilty doing it for him when I didn't have it for the others but I also knew he was my last and it was my only chance to have those precious pics. Think of it this way...it's what I had to do: With Nathan, I took a lot of video, which was what I was into at the time...(the other kids have little or no video)...with Naomi...I did weekly layouts for the 1st six months...the other kids, not so much...so each child is different--loved and documented as equally as I can-- though not exactly the same. Try not to feel guilty chickie!

Don't even get me started on wedding photography Boy is it expensive (! rates have gone up quite a bit since I last hired one 11 years ago for $700!) but yes, SO worth it. I'm spending half our wedding budget on the photography and feeding people sandwiches

[amandabarugh]

I wish like heck I had gotten the birth photography done this time around. Maybe if I have a fourth, I'll do it. We, again, didn't get as many pictures of those first precious moments like I wanted.

[clearskies]

Photography wise, I would hire a different wedding photographer. Our pics are ok...but to me your wedding pics should make you feel like you're the most gorgeous woman in the world.

Personally...I would have not dated one particular guy. I've been able to see how God has used that relationship for good, but yeah, not my greatest decision ever...

[Milmomma]

I took hundreds of photos the first day and second day and so on. I don't see the need for professional ones. I've always done their pictures at each year. Back drop, and then my DSLR and tripod, I'm super happy with it. I have had better luck than taking them places. If nothing else, look up some photographers and grab a sheet and take some yourself sweetie.

My biggest regret would probably be not hugging my dad, or telling him I love him enough.

[MamaBee]

We had a family friend who dabbles in photography to our photos of kiddo when he was a month old... but now I can't find the CD they are on!

Re: wedding photographer... I so wish I got a different one for this. I really hated the one we had... and there are like 5 photos that are good and we spend over $1500 6 years ago! I chose them because I know other people who had them... and I got a good vibe when we met with the photographer and she showed us work and I told her what I wanted... what I didn't know was that the lady we talked with would not be our photographer and the photos shown weren't her work! I was so p&^%!! Our photographer had this pained look on her face and her mother came and they were chitchatting when we were suppose to be doing family photos. I was also suppose to get sunset photo, part of the package... but she was gone by that time! They are also all on film (digi was still really new and I didn't know how long it would last)... and I can't get the rights to my own photos... ever! Just thinking of all this... just gets my blood boiling... I'm like you Jae, I can't look at wedding photos because it bothers me that I don't have those...

Personal regret... I wish we tried for number two earlier... now it's going on 1.5 years... and our drop dead date for trying is my 35th birthday which is only 3 months away...

[ariesfl326]

Wow, regrets huh?...

1. I regret not finishing college and am still trying (at 39 years old).
2. I regret not taking videos of my daughter when she was a baby although I had a video camera. No patience when it came to figuring out how to use the darn thing so I gave up.
3. I regret not being able to stay home with my daughter (being a single mom, I have to work). I've missed alot (including her first steps) but I know in my heart I've done my best and she has had her grandmother and great-grandparents there to love her as well. Even today, she spends more time away from me, during summer break, because I rely on others to care for her. I just wish we had more time together.

[scrapperjade]

Originally Posted by Milmomma

I took hundreds of photos the first day and second day and so on. I don't see the need for professional ones. I've always done their pictures at each year. Back drop, and then my DSLR and tripod, I'm super happy with it. I have had better luck than taking them places. If nothing else, look up some photographers and grab a sheet and take some yourself sweetie.

My biggest regret would probably be not hugging my dad, or telling him I love him enough.

Oh trust me, I tried, lol. I thought to myself that I would just take some newborn shots myself - it couldn't be that hard right?? Bwahhahahahah! I did get a couple cute ones though, so at least I have something. Too bad my camera was crap though - the pictures are very poor quality and if I want to scrap them I have to do some pretty complicated editting, lol. Oh well.

Lena - I love what you said about loving them just as much, just documenting them differently! I also have a gajillion videos of her... I have her first roll, her first steps, her first bath, etc. And you can hear the love and pride in my voice as I'm encouraging her, talking to her... Thats something, isn't it??

[AmberK]

If I could go back I would have hired a different wedding photographer. The person who did ours was a friend and now she is a fabulous photographer but not so good when she did our wedding. There are HARSH shadows in most of my pictures and she didnt get ANY photos of just me and DH at the front of the church right after the wedding.

The other thing I wish I had known about is when my son passed away at 3 days old, there is an organization called Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep and they come and take pictures for free for familes who have had a stillborn or a death shortly after birth. I do have a lot of pictures of Colin with the family before he passed but I would have loved to have some of the professional shots.

[ColleenSwerb]

I just wanted to say, that I feel so lucky to be a part of this community. I was at a baby shower this weekend and was oohing and aahing over all sorts of things. Part of me felt weird for not having a baby or being pregnant myself, but knowing about this sort of stuff from all of you guys. And the other part was so happy that I have so many women I can lean on and learn from and ask questions of.

I knew that the photography would be super important to me for the wedding day, so I really pushed for it. We spent $3500, but now I have a DVD full of images from the happiest day of my life, that I have the full rights to and can do whatever I please. (And I'm not trying to say that to rub it in, I promise!) Did I get every image I wanted, did everything go as planned? No, it never does. But I have so many wonderful images to cherish.

I doubt I'll be so lucky when it comes to newborn photography, but at least I know I *want* newborn photography. I don't think I would know that I want it without this hobby and this wonderful group of people that I'm surrounded by.

Just remember that every experience is or can be, a learning experience. Now you *know*, for sure, that you will do anything to have that newborn session (and really, I think you should do the newborn session - include the rest of the family for sure, but let that next little one be the focus or you might regret that too; you can get family sessions done ANY time, but they are only newborns for such a short period of time). Avalynne has TONS and tons and tons of memories preserved because you scrapbook. She won't begrudge the next little one getting to have some time in the spotlight. She knows it doesn't mean you love #2 more than her.

[HeatherKS]

For me, it's definitely not taking more pictures of myself when I was preggo with #1. I have like one picture of my baby belly and it was when I was about 9 months pregnant with her. I took more when I was preggo with #2 and even more when I was preggo with #3. When I was pregnant with #1 I was at my heaviest weight ever and I just didn't feel good about myself and so I stayed away from the camera as much as I could. Now I'd like to look back and remember that time and there's nothing documented.

[newfiemountiewife]

I wish that I had gone to college after I finished high school. At the time, coaching figure skating was a lucrative profession, and instead, I opted for that. Now, I'm untrained to do anything else, and it's become a difficult career to make money in year round. I'm so depressed about it right now, because I had planned to go back to school this year, and they cancelled the program I was going to take.

I feel so much regret, because I feel like I'm letting my family down in a big way, by not contributing financially through part of the year, and also myself, because I graduated with Honours, and could have done anything I wanted. Instead, I wasted it, and did nothing.

[Joana1n]

I'm so right there with you on the newborn photography thing. I'm a photographer and foolishly thought (TWICE) that I could shoot my own newborns. However, I have such a tough recovery from childbirth that I'm not physically really able to shoot until the babies are 3+ weeks old, which is not the best time to shoot newborn photos (within 10 days of birth is ideal).

We got some sweet ones of DS at 6 weeks old, but I wish wish wish I had pro newborn photos of both babies within their first few days of life. *iCry*

And DS is the last baby.

[scrapperjade]

After Britney commented about hanging up a sheet and doing some of their own, I went back in Ava's photos and found the shoot I did when she was 3 weeks old. She was only about 6 lbs when the photos were taken, and now that I know a bit more about photo editting & using actions, I have this:





I have a whole series of them, as well as some with her in a small basket (she could lay curled up in it, now I used it for some of her smaller toys - it's about the size to fit magazines)

I feel better now - at least I have *something* of her in her little newborn-ness, and I still have that cup, it reminds me of how tiny she was!

[lovely1m]

I wanted newbown photos, too, but couldn't afford a real photographer then, so we went to JCPenney's (where I actually worked as a photographer) and got some for a real reasonable price. They aren't as good as some of the photos I got later with a professional, but they are good.

My wedding photographer was the same as above, the person I talked to was not the one who came ot my wedding. The guy we had was terrible. We had a horse and carriage and he only took pictures of the horses rear end! No pictures of the whole thing. He also has a light pole instead of my last 3 bridesmaids in the ceremony photos, just real amueter issues. If I had know the person I talked to, the owner, would not have shot the wedding, I would have choose someone else.

My biggest regret, not moving that damn blanket off the floor so my kiddo wouldn't be sitting in a cast right now.

[carrie1977]

Originally Posted by mturnidge

I hear ya! My one thing I wish I could do over was to hire a professional to take our wedding photos. Ours were done for free from someone who didn't know what he was doing... and shot it all in auto. Sometimes it makes me so sad to look at my pics with my teal looking dress and horribly underexposed faces.... and there was only so much I could do to improve them (our wedding photos were the reason I got PSE in the first place... so I could try and fix them).

I really want to do a trash the dress session sometime with hubby.... it wouldn't be the same, but I think it'd make up for it a little bit and could be really fun!

I would do the same thing. We really just relied on the photos that all of our friends/family took. We just couldn't afford a photographer. We did most of the decorating and all of the cooking by ourselves. All our flowers were artificial except for my bouquet, my hubby's and the cake flowers......shoot I guess I would want to do my whole wedding all over again. LOL!

[scrapperjade]

Originally Posted by carrie1977

I would do the same thing. We really just relied on the photos that all of our friends/family took. We just couldn't afford a photographer. We did most of the decorating and all of the cooking by ourselves. All our flowers were artificial except for my bouquet, my hubby's and the cake flowers......shoot I guess I would want to do my whole wedding all over again. LOL!

Maybe you could someday - you could renew your vows at your 10th or 15th anniversary... have a re-do! Lots of people do it!

[mkcdaisy]

No kids yet but I am also lucky to have a friend who is a professional photography.

However for my wedding I gave her the choice - guest or photographer. She just wanted to be a guest so I hired one I worked for years ago. I can tell you that was a big portion of the wedding budget but I don't regret it all at. Other than the fact the marriage didn't last HAHA

[DawnMarch]

Do you ever wish you could? Just to do 1 thing differently?

I have a huge regret. I wanted SO badly to have newborn pictures taken of Avalynne

well, hon, all I can say is if this is your one and only regret in life, you must be a very good girl.

[scrapperjade]

Originally Posted by DawnMarch

well, hon, all I can say is if this is your one and only regret in life, you must be a very good girl.

LOL... you know - I really was! Even when I was a teenager I was a good girl, lol. And I was truly fortunate that my first boyfriend is now my husband, so I have no regrets there, lol.

Guess I've been lucky so far .

[sprauncey1]

Originally Posted by AmberK

The other thing I wish I had known about is when my son passed away at 3 days old, there is an organization called Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep and they come and take pictures for free for familes who have had a stillborn or a death shortly after birth. I do have a lot of pictures of Colin with the family before he passed but I would have loved to have some of the professional shots.

I have a friend that does this and we always tell her what a special blessing she is for those families. She says it is really hard but she knows that it is her calling as part of being blessed with photography skills. I'm surprised the hospital didn't know about them, or maybe they weren't very organized in your area. Anyway...sorry you had to go through this!

[AmberK]

Thanks! I dont know how long the organization has been around but my son passed 5 years ago so they may not have been well known at the time. I've had several friends who have lost babies shortly after birth and I have referred them to this organization and the pictures the photographers took were just amazing!

Originally Posted by sprauncey1

I have a friend that does this and we always tell her what a special blessing she is for those families. She says it is really hard but she knows that it is her calling as part of being blessed with photography skills. I'm surprised the hospital didn't know about them, or maybe they weren't very organized in your area. Anyway...sorry you had to go through this!

[chez]

I wish to this day that I had tried my dress on before I left for Vegas. It wasnt supposed to be altered just a bustle added. well needless to say it was altered and did not fit. long story, major panic attack 1 hour before show time!

[breakingbrie]

I think the big one for me, is not having a single pic of me when I was pregnant! I know my MIL took some at my baby shower, but never got them developed, and can't find the rolls of film. I wasn't into scrapping then, and wasn't really thinking that whatever I felt about seeing me in pictures would be way worth it to have pics of my pregnancy to show my girls when they get older, and to have photos for the storytelling/scrapping. I wish I had at least documented more. It sucks that I'll never get that time back, and my girls will never get to see pics of me pregnant with them. That makes me sad.

[rach3975]

I tend not to dwell on the past, so when I first read the question I thought, "I'm generally pretty happy with my life. I don't have a big regret." But thinking about it more, I do have a few.

1. I wouldn't have gone to grad school when I did. I went a few years before we had kids, and our thinking was that with my master's I could work part time and still earn enough after we had kids. But over those few years DH's salary went up enough that I was able to be a SAHM. By the time I go back to work, my degree will be old enough that it's no help given the time out of the work force. Thankfully I went part time while working, so I don't have any debt from it. Even so, I'd rather have saved the money and gone to update my skills before returning to work.

2. I wish I hadn't let so many friends slip away due to my shyness and the difficulty of maintaining long distance friendships.

3. I wish I hadn't gained so much weight after having kids. Taking it off and keeping it off is so much harder (and not happening )

As far as photography goes, the one thing I'd change was my wedding photographer. I was 23 when we got married, and since we were getting married in my hometown and lived 6 hours away I let my mother make most of the arrangements. She did a wonderful job with everything else, but she never takes photos and knows very little about photography. At the time I didn't think much about photography even though I'd always liked documenting my life by taking photos, so I let her pick the photographer and figured she'd do fine with that, too. I should have asked to meet with the photographer earlier in the process, but I didn't think to and by the time we did it was too late to change things. Our photos are all dark and she missed big moments like my inlaws walking my DH down the aisle. I'm still glad to have them, but they should have been better. She went out of business a few years ago and offered us all our negatives for a great price, but we didn't buy them. We already had an album, and there were very few photos we'd want to reprint.

[nesser1981]

I wish I'd have figured something different out for Cooper's newborn pictures. I went to kiddie kandids with Keira when she was just a week old, hers turned out really cute, of course not the newborn standard today. We were in Alaska and didn't have a ton of choices, so Coop got JcPenny's. Not great ones.

And, I would have watched what I was eating after I got married instead of gaining 25 pounds, just like last summer I've gained like 30 pounds, probably more. I wish I would have paid more attention to that.

[Milmomma]

Originally Posted by scrapperjade

After Britney commented about hanging up a sheet and doing some of their own, I went back in Ava's photos and found the shoot I did when she was 3 weeks old. She was only about 6 lbs when the photos were taken, and now that I know a bit more about photo editting & using actions, I have this:





I have a whole series of them, as well as some with her in a small basket (she could lay curled up in it, now I used it for some of her smaller toys - it's about the size to fit magazines)

I feel better now - at least I have *something* of her in her little newborn-ness, and I still have that cup, it reminds me of how tiny she was!

Awe, I'm freaking happy you found some, and they look great! I think the cup thing is just adorable!!!!

[littlekiwi]

I would have taken more science courses at high school rather than computer classes so that I would have a degree by now rather than 7/8 papers through a certificate yet to get into a degree at 23 years old - most of my high school classmates graduated this past April

[Ebony]

"My biggest regret would probably be not hugging my dad, or telling him I love him enough." Totally hearing ya.

[crecia27]

I don't have many regrets, mostly I regret gaining all my weight back and now having to fight to lose it again. I do wish I'd not hated my body so much and had more pictures taken documenting all 3 of my pregnancies. Aside from shower pictures I don't have any, meaning with my little girl I have NONE.

[AlliJ2008]

As far as photography regrets go I wish I had known about newborn photography when my son was born. I didn't even think to look into having a pro come to the house to do a photoshoot and just took him to Kiddie Kandids at about 6 wks old. They were only able to take 1 photo before he started screaming his head off so at least I got it free. If we were to have another baby I wouldn't think twice about hiring a pro to come do a formal newborn session. I think it is typical that each child's life gets documented differently (like Lena said) but doesn't make it less important.

[junebug]

it would have been nice to have a professional photographer at our wedding, but then again the wedding itself was so simple and kinda got messed up. the original date was supposed to be July 16th but because DH was still in Basic training and they changed his date to be done we had to move it to the 19th after we had invitations done and everything because they swore he'd be done in time too. i was so mad. it was a very simple wedding; at the time i don't think i really cared about the photos lol. i just wanted to get married. my friend and her mom made my bouquet (which turned out so pretty) our reception was in a friends backyard, and we served deli trays and punch lol. my mom and others took simple little photos. but now looking back it would have been nice to maybe have actually posed and had a session lol. oh well.

and i can relate to the newborn photos too; we had Chloe's pictures done when she was around 6 mos and again at 1. i never did it with my other two; but i started getting into photography when my second was born so atleast i have my own pictures